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lisaam's review against another edition
funny
lighthearted
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
chalicotherex's review against another edition
4.0
Imagine someone told P.G. Wodehouse what sex was. I won't say it's funnier than Wodehouse, for one thing it's a play and it's meant to be seen, not read, so I can't tell. But maybe close. It might have more plot than Wodehouse. So much plot, many twists. There's a great coffee-laudanum-strychnine mix up, and the love triangle is closer to a love dodecagon (I lost count).
Good art joke:LUCIENNE: Oh yes! He’s having a tête à tête with a Corot. I’ll go and make sure he hasn’t got lost in the landscape and bring him back here.
MITZI: Ach, ja! Because I love you still! Ach, mein Gott, I have left Zürich to find you. I have crossed the Alps which made me ill as I suffer from vertigo. I was sick. I have thrown up… I have thrown up… How shall I put it?
VATELIN: I should leave it just where it is.
...
VATELIN: Yes, but I do! Please be sensible! I’m very touched, of course, but our little romance born in Zürich was never meant to have a future. How could it? We met in a cablecar. You were giddy. I was giddy. You were sick. I was sick. We were both ill. It was fate. What can happen did happen. Let’s content ourselves with the memory of that special time, not try and start it all over again. Besides I can’t make love to you here in Paris. There it was different: I had an excuse. There are things you can do on one side of the Alps which you can’t do on the other. So follow my example. Deny yourself as I do daily. And forget me. There must be other attractive men in Zürich.
MITZI: Nein, nein. I am a faithful woman. One husband. One lover. Full stop!
Manic:MITZI: Ach ja! My head… Straight in the lion’s beak!
VATELIN: Quite! (Exasperated again.) Only one says mouth, not beak. Lion’s mouth. A lion doesn’t have a beak. Just a small observation… en passant. (Hysterical.) What does it matter!! I can’t play the part you want. I simply can’t! And if you won’t be reasonable, then I must… on your behalf. Good-bye!
MITZI: Crépine! Crépine! Stay! Oh, do stay!
VATELIN: No. Let go. Let go of me!
MITZI: Nein.
VATELIN: No?
MITZI: Alright! I’ll kill myself!
VATELIN: Oh my God, not again! This is blackmail! Alright. Go ahead. Kill yourself and leave me in peace!
MITZI: Very well. First, eine tasse kaffee. Then einen kleinen kuchen. And then death! (She pours a cup of coffee.)
VATELIN: Well, go on then! Get on with it!
MITZI: Will you have a cup?
VATELIN: What?
MITZI: I said, will you have a cup? Of coffee.
VATELIN: Oh, alright then.
MITZI pours a cup and hands it to him.
MITZI: One lump? Or two?
VATELIN: Four.
MITZI: That’s quite a lot.
VATELIN: (Stirring his coffee.) So?
MITZI: (Taking a small flask from her pocket.) One drop? Or two?
VATELIN: I don’t know. Whatever you like. Give me a spoonful.
MITZI: Himmel! That really is a lot! (Pouring.) A spoonful. Enough to finish off a regiment.
VATELIN: Eh? What is it?
MITZI: Strychnine. (She puts the flask to her lips.)
VATELIN: (Trying to grab the flask.) Put that down!
MITZI: Nein! I want to drink the lot and die at your foot!
VATELIN: Mitzi! I beg you!
MITZI: (Trying to raise the flask to her lips.) Nein! Auf wiedersehen, Crépine!
An aunt/uncle joke worthy of Wodehouse:
EDILLON: I’m so sorry. He’s an old retainer. Part of the family. His mother was Papa’s wet-nurse. So we’re milk rather than blood relations.
ARMANDINE: Really.
REDILLON: He’s a sort of wet-uncle.
ARMANDINE: He’s much more familiar with you than you are with him.
REDILLON: Well, so I should think. He was present at my birth. I wasn’t at his. (Yawning.) Oh Lord, I’m so tired. (He stretches out on the sofa.)
REDILLON falls asleep. A pause.
LUCIENNE: Well?
REDILLON: (Stirring.) Well, what?
LUCIENNE: Is that all?
REDILLON: (Waking up.) What do you mean, is that all?
Oh, Lucienne, Lucienne…!
LUCIENNE: (Beginning to get angry.) Well what? Lucienne, Lucienne! Can’t you say anything else?
REDILLON: (Sitting up.) Lucienne, I don’t know if it’s the excitement… or the emotion… but I swear this is the first time this has ever happened to me.
LUCIENNE: Oh! You told me that you loved me.
REDILLON: But I do. I do love you. Only understand that I never ever expected… such happiness… such joy…
I’m overjoyed! That’s the trouble! Then add to that my scruples – the scruples of a decent man. They won’t last… but they have some justification nonetheless.
LUCIENNE: It’s a little late in the day for scruples, my friend.
REDILLON: No, no, they’ll pass, I tell you. But just give me a moment to reflect. Come back tomorrow! Come back tonight!
LUCIENNE: Tomorrow! Tonight! That’s out of the question. My husband will be here at any moment.
REDILLON: What?
LUCIENNE: I must have taken my revenge by the time he walks through the door.
LUCIENNE: Forgive me, Madame, but ‘Avenge me, I’m yours…?’ Aren’t you being a little forward?
MME PONTAGNAC: I don’t know what you mean, Madame. It’s all been agreed with Monsieur Rédillon.
LUCIENNE: Oh, but forgive me, Madame. I was here first!
I don't think this one will translate without context and build up, but it's the hardest I laughed:VATELIN, then LUCIENNE, PONTAGNAC, SOLDIGNAC.
VATELIN: Oh my God! I’m not really up to this. Jump in bed? I’d sooner jump in the river! (He sits on the bed, lost in thought. The bell under the mattress rings. A long pause while he listens.) Extraordinarily noisy bells in this hotel!
The door to Room 38 opens noiselessly and LUCIENNE puts her head round. Recognising her husband’s back, she raises her arms to heaven and opens her mouth. PONTAGNAC enters, puts his hand over her mouth and shakes his head – there is only one person there. He pulls her out and swiftly closes the door. The business is silent and speedy.
Good art joke:
VATELIN: I should leave it just where it is.
...
VATELIN: Yes, but I do! Please be sensible! I’m very touched, of course, but our little romance born in Zürich was never meant to have a future. How could it? We met in a cablecar. You were giddy. I was giddy. You were sick. I was sick. We were both ill. It was fate. What can happen did happen. Let’s content ourselves with the memory of that special time, not try and start it all over again. Besides I can’t make love to you here in Paris. There it was different: I had an excuse. There are things you can do on one side of the Alps which you can’t do on the other. So follow my example. Deny yourself as I do daily. And forget me. There must be other attractive men in Zürich.
MITZI: Nein, nein. I am a faithful woman. One husband. One lover. Full stop!
Manic:
VATELIN: Quite! (Exasperated again.) Only one says mouth, not beak. Lion’s mouth. A lion doesn’t have a beak. Just a small observation… en passant. (Hysterical.) What does it matter!! I can’t play the part you want. I simply can’t! And if you won’t be reasonable, then I must… on your behalf. Good-bye!
MITZI: Crépine! Crépine! Stay! Oh, do stay!
VATELIN: No. Let go. Let go of me!
MITZI: Nein.
VATELIN: No?
MITZI: Alright! I’ll kill myself!
VATELIN: Oh my God, not again! This is blackmail! Alright. Go ahead. Kill yourself and leave me in peace!
MITZI: Very well. First, eine tasse kaffee. Then einen kleinen kuchen. And then death! (She pours a cup of coffee.)
VATELIN: Well, go on then! Get on with it!
MITZI: Will you have a cup?
VATELIN: What?
MITZI: I said, will you have a cup? Of coffee.
VATELIN: Oh, alright then.
MITZI pours a cup and hands it to him.
MITZI: One lump? Or two?
VATELIN: Four.
MITZI: That’s quite a lot.
VATELIN: (Stirring his coffee.) So?
MITZI: (Taking a small flask from her pocket.) One drop? Or two?
VATELIN: I don’t know. Whatever you like. Give me a spoonful.
MITZI: Himmel! That really is a lot! (Pouring.) A spoonful. Enough to finish off a regiment.
VATELIN: Eh? What is it?
MITZI: Strychnine. (She puts the flask to her lips.)
VATELIN: (Trying to grab the flask.) Put that down!
MITZI: Nein! I want to drink the lot and die at your foot!
VATELIN: Mitzi! I beg you!
MITZI: (Trying to raise the flask to her lips.) Nein! Auf wiedersehen, Crépine!
An aunt/uncle joke worthy of Wodehouse:
EDILLON: I’m so sorry. He’s an old retainer. Part of the family. His mother was Papa’s wet-nurse. So we’re milk rather than blood relations.
ARMANDINE: Really.
REDILLON: He’s a sort of wet-uncle.
ARMANDINE: He’s much more familiar with you than you are with him.
REDILLON: Well, so I should think. He was present at my birth. I wasn’t at his. (Yawning.) Oh Lord, I’m so tired. (He stretches out on the sofa.)
LUCIENNE: Well?
REDILLON: (Stirring.) Well, what?
LUCIENNE: Is that all?
REDILLON: (Waking up.) What do you mean, is that all?
Oh, Lucienne, Lucienne…!
LUCIENNE: (Beginning to get angry.) Well what? Lucienne, Lucienne! Can’t you say anything else?
REDILLON: (Sitting up.) Lucienne, I don’t know if it’s the excitement… or the emotion… but I swear this is the first time this has ever happened to me.
LUCIENNE: Oh! You told me that you loved me.
REDILLON: But I do. I do love you. Only understand that I never ever expected… such happiness… such joy…
I’m overjoyed! That’s the trouble! Then add to that my scruples – the scruples of a decent man. They won’t last… but they have some justification nonetheless.
LUCIENNE: It’s a little late in the day for scruples, my friend.
REDILLON: No, no, they’ll pass, I tell you. But just give me a moment to reflect. Come back tomorrow! Come back tonight!
LUCIENNE: Tomorrow! Tonight! That’s out of the question. My husband will be here at any moment.
REDILLON: What?
LUCIENNE: I must have taken my revenge by the time he walks through the door.
MME PONTAGNAC: I don’t know what you mean, Madame. It’s all been agreed with Monsieur Rédillon.
LUCIENNE: Oh, but forgive me, Madame. I was here first!
I don't think this one will translate without context and build up, but it's the hardest I laughed:
VATELIN: Oh my God! I’m not really up to this. Jump in bed? I’d sooner jump in the river! (He sits on the bed, lost in thought. The bell under the mattress rings. A long pause while he listens.) Extraordinarily noisy bells in this hotel!
The door to Room 38 opens noiselessly and LUCIENNE puts her head round. Recognising her husband’s back, she raises her arms to heaven and opens her mouth. PONTAGNAC enters, puts his hand over her mouth and shakes his head – there is only one person there. He pulls her out and swiftly closes the door. The business is silent and speedy.
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