Reviews with content warning for Physical abuse - Expiation

Upon finishing this book, I have one thought: I am shook. This book really was a whirlwind, but so so good. The language was absolutely beautiful, I don't know how to describe it. It was also very imaginative and descriptive. This is the most slow paced book i have read recently, with a lot of the start being many character's perspective of the same event, helping to build a good visual. It also seems like the reader is a judge collecting evidence, to establish the scene of the crime. It felt like a fishbowl discussion, everyone sitting in a circle watching the same thing and telling their versions. Initially I didn't understand some parts, there were lots of inner monologue and no dialogue for a while. All of the perspectives in this book were female, except for a jarring male perspective twice in part one and the entire way through part two. I was at a loss to understand why the book was named Atonement, when for 42% of the book, I didn't know what Briony was atoning for. I could not perceive either how, as the blurb stated, all three of their lives would change. Initially I hated

Robbie. I mean it wasn't hard to, he seemed to think he owned Cecilia and that she owed him something. And the way he talked about her was vile. I wanted Briony's crime to be hurting Robbie in some way. And i got what I asked for...

. The book is especially imaginative through Briony's eyes, as she is a writer and sees the world a certain way. I really started to get hooked because of the beautiful writing. We as the readers see Briony growing up within days, and then over the years. I felt like it was an in-depth character study on her. I found every perspective so interesting, especially how the mother saw parts of Hermione in Lola. The dramatic irony was intense because as readers, we knew that Briony would commit a crime but they did not know that!! It was very tense and I was dying to know more. Part 2 was a complete shift as it turned into basically a WW2 diary. I didn't love this part and didn't know if it would have relevance in the final chapters. It did show how

Robbie's life had changed and how because of one small action, breaking a vase, he was now dying in the war. It really does show a long butterfly effect

. I also did guess what Briony's crime would be,

false accusation. I had to re-read this part a few times to understand what had happened but I eventually understood. Her realising what she had done and her repenting was very interesting

. I was also a little annoyed by the lack of chapters in part 2 and 3. Part 2 was a lot less imaginative and more recounting, and this is because it was told through Robbie's eyes, and Robbie, unlike Briony, is not a writer, seeing the world with imaginative detail. I was excited to see what came next despite not loving how it had turned into a ww2 novel.

Briony's change to become a nurse was very interesting because you could see how years of guilt stripped her away to a less imaginative version of herself. There was a line about how her diary was now where she kept her true self because she had to be Nurse Tallis. It was very beautiful. Also the inclusion of the anecdote about 'I'm B Tallis not N Tallis' was a funny pull back to reality

. Throughout the book I was always in awe of the beautiful language and how intrigued I was. When it was revealed that

Paul Marshall raped and hurt Lola, I was surprised a little and thought "ah, what a good ending". But it did not end there. That point when she went to the wedding was intense, it was the exact product of Briony's mistake. But Briony did not end at the wedding. I had to read the final page 3 times to understand what had happened - Briony never saw Cecilia and Robbie again, they had died of bombing and illness respectively. Briony never wrote to the judge and turned her accusation. She had dreamed up a happy ending for Cee and Robbie as her way, as a writer's way, of atoning. It was never obvious, you assumed Robbie got out at Dunkirk and that Cecilia never got bombed. But wow. That left me shook. In reality they were both dead, but in Briony's words, a writer writes to give the audience (Cee and Rob) what they want. And what they wouldve wanted was a nice happy ending that they DESERVED, but didn't get because of Briony. Some people hate Briony but I find it hard to, she was a child who did what any child would have done in that situation, and it changed her whole life. Of course she wasn't completely guiltless. And the rapist stupid Paul Marshall was still with his victim. I can't stop thinking about how Leon shouldn't have brought him home! But that would be victim blaming.

. And nothing in the book was just for fun. The trials of Arabella chapter had significance, as did Robbie's ww2 diary. It built me up to like Robbie again, to sympathise with him and understand his POV, to really get to know him before the end of the book. It was shocking, disturbing, but wonderful. I read this from the 7th-12 of Feb 2022, as part of the Dymocks reading challenge for 'book you've always meant to read'. My mother recommended it to me years ago. I am glad I didn't read it then because I feel like I would not have appreciated it as much then. 4.25 stars

Content Warnings