foreverinastory's review against another edition
emotional
tense
medium-paced
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
I picked this book up specifically because it deals with a boy who is intersex. My knowledge of intersex people is severely lacking, and books with this rep are as well. While overall, I did like this story, I'm not an own voices reviewer, so I cannot genuinely tell you how this portrayal of an intersex person is.
Okay first this book needs a HUGE CONTENT WARNING FOR GRAPHIC SEXUAL ASSAULT! Within the first 5-10%. Like holy shit, I was not prepared at all for this to happen. Rape and sexual assault are not one of my triggers, but holy fuck this scene was so detailed, I was so uncomfortable I debated DNF-ing this book because of it. I felt so much pain for Max during this scene, it was awful. Also, Karen, Max's mother, was pretty awful. She says many transphobic comments and I really hated being in her head. Also is intersexist a word? Is there a word like transphobic that applies specifically to intersex struggles? ( I did a quick google and did not see anything at this time)
Before I talk more about this book, let me define some terms for y'all because I am sure many of you are like wtf is intersex. "Intersex is an umbrella term used to describe a wide range of natural variations that affect genitals, gonads, hormones, chromosomes or reproductive organs. Sometimes these characteristics are visible at birth, sometimes they appear at puberty, and sometimes they are not physically apparent at all." This is from Amnesty international, on their page of intersex awareness day. There are several other outdated terms that have been used to describe intersex people and I will not be using any of them here, many if not all of them are degrading. Some of these terms do show up in this book, which I was not a huge fan of.
Intersex and transgender are separate things. Intersex deals with the actual sex of a person, because surprise sex is NOT binary. And neither is gender. A person can be both intersex and trans, but not all intersex people are trans, and not all trans people are intersex. Also, intersex people are not necessarily non-binary even if they have ambiguous genitalia. Again, gender identity and your physical sex are not the same thing.
Through this story Max is dealing with a lot: from the rape, to trying to understand what being intersex means to him, and navigating high school. A good part of the story deals with Max's burgeoning relationship with a classmate, Sylvie, and his family navigating the aftermath of Max's assault, while his father runs for MP. There was a lot going on in this book. I really loved seeing Max and Sylvie together, also Sylvie is loyal af and she doesn't let the mean girls at school try to spread rumors about Max. It was wonderful. One thing that bothered me though was how Max thought of romance and how tangled it was with having sex. It was excruciatingly aphobic. Listen romance does not equal sex and sex does not equal romance. You don't have to have sex to have a healthy and loving relationship.
I did like the family dynamic in this book, especially Max's father. Oh my god the support and love he has for Max just made me soft and I love him so much. This book has several different POVs and we bounce between Max, his brother, Daniel, the parents, Sylvie, and Max's doctor Archie. I don't know if Daniel was meant to be described with some stereotypical autism markers, but he definitely was and I am very much conflicted because I don't know if it was meant to come across this way and if it's even an accurate portrayal of autism. Or is my brain overthinking this?? Regardless, the bond between Max and Daniel was absolutely precious. Their friendship was the best, and even though they had their issues, the ending made me happy for these two.
This book also deals with pregnancy, abortion and intersex surgeries, but I will be putting my thoughts here in a spoiler.
Okay lastly, I want to discuss part of the ending, but it will all be in spoilers because there's no way not to get spoiler-y here. CW: suicide/attempted suicide, sexual assault
However, there is also the arrest of Hunter for rape of a minor after Karen comes rushing home after dragging the answer out of Archie (more a non-answer). Karen can't get over the fact her son is gay (which he's not) and never gives Max the space or time to try to tell her he was assaulted. Karen is awful. Max doesn't even tell his parents, Sylvie is there at the time and ends up telling them for him. Look, I'm all for the arrest of rapists, but I didn't really like how it wasn't Max's idea to press charges here. Also Karen was an absentee parent and not listening for a big portion of this book and after this she thinks she can come rushing back to "save" Max? No bitch.
Overall, I loved the characters besides fucking Karen who is awful. And the family bond between Max, Daniel and his dad was lovely. Intersex rep was questionable though and Max's thoughts were sadly very aphobic, sigh.
Okay first this book needs a HUGE CONTENT WARNING FOR GRAPHIC SEXUAL ASSAULT! Within the first 5-10%. Like holy shit, I was not prepared at all for this to happen. Rape and sexual assault are not one of my triggers, but holy fuck this scene was so detailed, I was so uncomfortable I debated DNF-ing this book because of it. I felt so much pain for Max during this scene, it was awful. Also, Karen, Max's mother, was pretty awful. She says many transphobic comments and I really hated being in her head. Also is intersexist a word? Is there a word like transphobic that applies specifically to intersex struggles? ( I did a quick google and did not see anything at this time)
Before I talk more about this book, let me define some terms for y'all because I am sure many of you are like wtf is intersex. "Intersex is an umbrella term used to describe a wide range of natural variations that affect genitals, gonads, hormones, chromosomes or reproductive organs. Sometimes these characteristics are visible at birth, sometimes they appear at puberty, and sometimes they are not physically apparent at all." This is from Amnesty international, on their page of intersex awareness day. There are several other outdated terms that have been used to describe intersex people and I will not be using any of them here, many if not all of them are degrading. Some of these terms do show up in this book, which I was not a huge fan of.
Intersex and transgender are separate things. Intersex deals with the actual sex of a person, because surprise sex is NOT binary. And neither is gender. A person can be both intersex and trans, but not all intersex people are trans, and not all trans people are intersex. Also, intersex people are not necessarily non-binary even if they have ambiguous genitalia. Again, gender identity and your physical sex are not the same thing.
Through this story Max is dealing with a lot: from the rape, to trying to understand what being intersex means to him, and navigating high school. A good part of the story deals with Max's burgeoning relationship with a classmate, Sylvie, and his family navigating the aftermath of Max's assault, while his father runs for MP. There was a lot going on in this book. I really loved seeing Max and Sylvie together, also Sylvie is loyal af and she doesn't let the mean girls at school try to spread rumors about Max. It was wonderful. One thing that bothered me though was how Max thought of romance and how tangled it was with having sex. It was excruciatingly aphobic. Listen romance does not equal sex and sex does not equal romance. You don't have to have sex to have a healthy and loving relationship.
I did like the family dynamic in this book, especially Max's father. Oh my god the support and love he has for Max just made me soft and I love him so much. This book has several different POVs and we bounce between Max, his brother, Daniel, the parents, Sylvie, and Max's doctor Archie. I don't know if Daniel was meant to be described with some stereotypical autism markers, but he definitely was and I am very much conflicted because I don't know if it was meant to come across this way and if it's even an accurate portrayal of autism. Or is my brain overthinking this?? Regardless, the bond between Max and Daniel was absolutely precious. Their friendship was the best, and even though they had their issues, the ending made me happy for these two.
This book also deals with pregnancy, abortion and intersex surgeries, but I will be putting my thoughts here in a spoiler.
Spoiler
Max becomes pregnant due to his assault, and this is where he meets Archie who ends up helping him sort through some of his confusion around being intersex. His parents never really talked about it, so Max doesn't understand what it means through a good portion of the book. He attempts to use a morning after pill which doesn't work. Then his parents decide for him that he'll get an abortion. And Karen starts going all commando parent and is like Max will also be getting rid of his female genitalia. Seriously, I hate Karen. When Max is finally going into the abortion, which he has agreed to at this point, he starts to panic as the operation begins. He begs his mom non-verbally to stop it. Guess what Karen does? She doesn't stop it. This bitch. She does end up cancelling the following surgeries that would've removed Max's uterus and ovary. Max's dad wasn't there until after the surgery and he is pissed at Karen, and so is Max, rightfully so.Okay lastly, I want to discuss part of the ending, but it will all be in spoilers because there's no way not to get spoiler-y here. CW: suicide/attempted suicide, sexual assault
Spoiler
Near the end, Max takes a very large dose of pain medication in an attempt to stop feeling, and he overdoses. He was also drunk when he did this, so it was a very tense scene. Right before this, he is cornered by his rapist, Hunter, who kisses him without his consent and tries to coerce Max into having sex with him. If Max had actually died, I would've rated this a 1 star or negative because I'm not here for the bury your intersex (gays) trope and I want queer characters to be happy and have happy endings, especially when they are the main queer character within the story. Max thankfully does not die, and begins going to therapy and talking with his family more.However, there is also the arrest of Hunter for rape of a minor after Karen comes rushing home after dragging the answer out of Archie (more a non-answer). Karen can't get over the fact her son is gay (which he's not) and never gives Max the space or time to try to tell her he was assaulted. Karen is awful. Max doesn't even tell his parents, Sylvie is there at the time and ends up telling them for him. Look, I'm all for the arrest of rapists, but I didn't really like how it wasn't Max's idea to press charges here. Also Karen was an absentee parent and not listening for a big portion of this book and after this she thinks she can come rushing back to "save" Max? No bitch.
Overall, I loved the characters besides fucking Karen who is awful. And the family bond between Max, Daniel and his dad was lovely. Intersex rep was questionable though and Max's thoughts were sadly very aphobic, sigh.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, and Sexual content
Moderate: Panic attacks/disorders, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, and Homophobia
Forced abortion
More...