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I'm sorry, mama Aimu sōrī, mama, by Natsuo Kirino, 桐野 夏生

meeners's review

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3.0

rather than give a plot description in the conventional way, i'm going to describe a snippet from a scene that occurs fairly early on. it's a bit of a spoiler, but not a huge one, and i think it'll give potential readers a much better sense of what they're getting into when they start this strange, dark, and unremorsefully sensationalist crime novel.

in the grand tradition of noir fiction, kirino natsuo centers her story of murder and twisted revenge around the criminal, a woman named aiko. (this is not a spoiler, btw; all this is on the back cover.) here's how the scene starts: fresh from a double murder in tokyo (also revealed on the back cover), aiko has fled to yokosuka to seek shelter with an old acquaintance named emiko (a former prostitute and aiko's erstwhile pimp - but that's a whole 'nother story). she's brought with her all the possessions she can carry or cart: clothes, makeup, a one-person rice cooker, her mother's old shoes (which she's carried with her since childhood, and talks to when she thinks no one is around - again, a whole 'nother story...), and a huge 5kg frozen hunk of premium sirloin steak stolen from the yakiniku restaurant that employs her. the sirloin steak is (of course!) an omiyage gift for emiko, because god help you if you turn up at an acquaintance's house without anything in hand, never mind the murders and the thefts and the other acts of moral depravity.

when aiko rings the doorbell, however, an unkempt strange answers the door. when aiko demands to know where emiko is, the stranger, who calls himself "adam" (it turns out he is a member of a cult called 太陽神会), insists that emiko is letting him stay in her living room while she's away. where emiko is and how long she's been there he refuses to say, and it's strongly implied that he probably killed emiko and buried her in the garden. aiko forces herself into the house and discovers that adam has built himself a tent-like thing right in the middle of the living room, built out of used disposable chopsticks and toothpicks. this, he proudly declares, is his home.

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE. out of the whole possible range of human emotion available to her, aiko decides to shrug the whole thing off (presumably because she has seen and done things even more bizarre????) and eat the meat herself. she and adam get into a conversation about the meat, and the constant repetition of the word (肉) gets them both hot and bothered. they proceed to have wild violent sex right on the kitchen floor, with the slab of meat sandwiched between them and all the bloody juices soaking into their skin. when they're done having wild violent sex naturally they find themselves hungry, so they eat the meat that had previously acted as their impromptu sex toy. (NATURALLY.)

some more things happen in that house, but i think i will stop here. this is the kind of book you are in for. i suppose it's a bit like out, in that its characters are mostly people on the fringes/underbelly of society. (side note: what i like about kirino is that she is very much aware of how they are constitutive members of that society but made invisible to it - also that she depicts the various intricate, interconnected groups of people and systems that make up the so-called underbelly.) but i'm sorry, mama lacks the critical edge and nuanced perspective of out, making it a bit too uncomfortably voyeuristic and sensationalist for me. it's certainly gripping, though, and very deftly structured. an easy read, broken down into short, distinct chapters - a good subway commuter book, in other words. but not the first book i'd recommend of hers.
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