Probably one of the books I recommend the most. I’ve read it something like five times in the last four years. It includes very accessible science and phenomenal strategies on how to process and release the stress that builds up in our bodies over years of repression. Introduced me to the concept of body language as in “learn to speak the language of your body” instead of just ignoring and hating it and wondering why it’s constantly rebelling against me. It helped me see emotions as information from my body and nervous system, and it helped me truly understand why the only way out is through—that emotions only feel like they last forever if we resist them.
"The quality of our lives is not measured by the amount of time we spend in a state of perfection."
"To be “well” is not to live in a state of perpetual safety and calm, but to move fluidly from a state of adversity, risk, adventure, or excitement, back to safety and calm, and out again. Stress is not bad for you; being stuck is bad for you."
“So how much rest is adequate? Science says: 42 percent. That’s the percentage of time your body and brain need you to spend resting. It’s about ten hours out of every twenty-four. It doesn’t have to be every day; it can average out over a week or a month or more. But yeah. That much. ‘That’s ridiculous! I don’t have that kind of time!’ you might protest—and we remind you that we predicted you might feel that way, back at the start of the chapter. We’re not saying you should take 42 percent of your time to rest; we’re saying that if you don’t take the 42 percent, the 42 percent will take you. It will grab you by the face, shove you to the ground, put its foot on your chest, and declare itself the victor.”
Read it for the chapters on fight/flight/freeze, on escaping the cycle of learned helplessness, and ESPECIALLY for the chapter on processing stress while laying in bed. (It’s not a perfect alternative to physical exercise, but a literal lifesaver when you’re disabled and struggling). I honestly don’t know who I would be if I hadn’t had these specific exercises during 2020-2024.
Graphic: Body shaming, Chronic illness, Fatphobia, Misogyny, and Sexism
Moderate: Ableism, Eating disorder, Mental illness, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Medical content, and Classism
Minor: Addiction, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Cursing, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Police brutality, Mass/school shootings, Gaslighting, and Alcohol