kupid's review against another edition
2.0
“I made a fatal error thinking he could save me.”
I have mixed feelings about this book, I didn't think it was life changing or incredibly fascinating, but I also didn't hate it, the characters had interesting dynamics that I wish were talked about more and you're given insight on to how somebody with a terminal illness may think.
I didn't rate this book lower than 3 stars because it felt wrong, I still learned new things about terminal illness and how this can affect somebody's life, as well as those around them. For the informative side I gave it the 3 stars.
I have mixed feelings about this book, I didn't think it was life changing or incredibly fascinating, but I also didn't hate it, the characters had interesting dynamics that I wish were talked about more and you're given insight on to how somebody with a terminal illness may think.
I didn't rate this book lower than 3 stars because it felt wrong, I still learned new things about terminal illness and how this can affect somebody's life, as well as those around them. For the informative side I gave it the 3 stars.
thetomatowriter's review against another edition
4.0
I liked the way the chapters were framed kind of like "moments," tying into that theme at the end. I like that Tessa didn't deal with her illness with this saintly grace that served as a lesson of goodness to those around her, but rather like an actual human teenager would. I LOVED her relationship with each member of her family, and her family as a whole. I also thought it was good at the end the way the chapters became scattered and confused, hard to read, because she was close to dying. The brief moments of chapters, however, make it a read with a lot of stops and starts, and it took me a little while longer to read this than it might usually for a book of similar size. It also didn't really GRAB me the way some books do. I didn't really feel that ache of wanting to actually know these characters in real life. It didn't make me as sad as the story probably should have. I really liked it, and I think it's one of the better "cancer books" out there (for what it's worth coming from a person who does not actually have cancer, so not much). But it didn't really wow me.
missprint_'s review against another edition
3.0
Pre review disclaimer: This book was recommended to me by "Amy" with the caveat that she'd heard it was excruciatingly sad and she knew readers who actually cried when they were talking about it. My morbid curiosity peaked, I decided to give the book a go after making provisions (though not really enough) for after-sad-book-reading with some funny books. Even with that buffer, I found myself feeling deeply melancholy while reading almost the entire second half of the novel. I don't really know what to say about this book because while it was good, it's just not my style to recommend sad books to people. So, I guess just read the review and if your interest is also peaked, give it a go. Just keep my little warnings in mind. So, if I haven't scared all of my readers off by now, onward to the review:
Before I Die (2007: David Fickling Books) is Jenny Downham's first novel (she trained as an actor and worked in alternative theater before writing according to her back flap bio). It is simultaneously life affirming and tragic.
Tessa Scott was diagnosed with cancer when she was twelve. Now sixteen, Tess is facing the unfathomable : her own death, much too soon and far too fast.
When the novel opens, Tess is in the midst of a self-imposed exile in her bedroom as she contemplates what dying really means when you haven't had much time to live and when your family tries to keep you optimistic and your best friend insists on acting like she understands.
But she can't. How can she possibly, when she has her whole life left? I hide under my hat again, just for a bit, because I'm going to miss breathing. And talking. And windows. I'm going to miss cake. And fish. I like fish. I like their little mouths going, open, shut, open.
And where I'm going, you can't take anything with you.
Then an idea forms. Tess has a list, ten things to do before she dies. Given the choice between dying quietly and taking this one last chance to live, Tess decides to go for it--asking her best friend Zoey to help her do it all.
The list starts with sex. When things don't go the way she had thought and she doesn't feel the way she had hoped, Tess considers giving up on the list altogether until she receives a new diagnosis.
How long can I stave it off? I don't know. All I know is that I have two choices--stay wrapped in blankets and get on with dying, or get the list back together and get on with living.
So that's exactly what Tess does. The items on the list range from the whimsical, like saying yes to everything for a day, to the poignant, like fame. The novel follows Tess as she completes the items on her list with varying levels of success and then through, literally, to the end.
Before I Die also spends a lot of time looking at Tessa's relationships with her family and her friends. It's interesting to see how her father and younger brother interact with Tess as well as how her absent mother tries to fit into the picture.
Tessa's friend Zoey, however, probably gets more page time than the family. Dealing with her own problems in the story, Zoey offers an interesting foil to Tess' situation. At the same time, their friendship provides the rather sobering reminder that, when someone is dying, it doesn't mean everyone else's lives can stop.
To borrow an old cliche, it's the relationship between Tess and her neighbor Adam that really pulls at a reader's heartstrings. As Tess and Adam try to connect, first as friends and then as something more, it's kind of heartbreaking to realize they can't always be together.
A lot of recently published novels are written in the present tense. That conceit is particularly appropriate in Before I Die since Tess can truly only live in the present. As I mentioned before, this novel doesn't end happily. But that doesn't make it less brilliant. Downham handles Tessa's death, narrated like the rest of the book in Tessa's voice, in a truly original way. I don't know that this book would be something to give someone who is already depressed over a death, but it does offer an interesting perspective on loss from a radically new perspective.
Before I Die (2007: David Fickling Books) is Jenny Downham's first novel (she trained as an actor and worked in alternative theater before writing according to her back flap bio). It is simultaneously life affirming and tragic.
Tessa Scott was diagnosed with cancer when she was twelve. Now sixteen, Tess is facing the unfathomable : her own death, much too soon and far too fast.
When the novel opens, Tess is in the midst of a self-imposed exile in her bedroom as she contemplates what dying really means when you haven't had much time to live and when your family tries to keep you optimistic and your best friend insists on acting like she understands.
But she can't. How can she possibly, when she has her whole life left? I hide under my hat again, just for a bit, because I'm going to miss breathing. And talking. And windows. I'm going to miss cake. And fish. I like fish. I like their little mouths going, open, shut, open.
And where I'm going, you can't take anything with you.
Then an idea forms. Tess has a list, ten things to do before she dies. Given the choice between dying quietly and taking this one last chance to live, Tess decides to go for it--asking her best friend Zoey to help her do it all.
The list starts with sex. When things don't go the way she had thought and she doesn't feel the way she had hoped, Tess considers giving up on the list altogether until she receives a new diagnosis.
How long can I stave it off? I don't know. All I know is that I have two choices--stay wrapped in blankets and get on with dying, or get the list back together and get on with living.
So that's exactly what Tess does. The items on the list range from the whimsical, like saying yes to everything for a day, to the poignant, like fame. The novel follows Tess as she completes the items on her list with varying levels of success and then through, literally, to the end.
Before I Die also spends a lot of time looking at Tessa's relationships with her family and her friends. It's interesting to see how her father and younger brother interact with Tess as well as how her absent mother tries to fit into the picture.
Tessa's friend Zoey, however, probably gets more page time than the family. Dealing with her own problems in the story, Zoey offers an interesting foil to Tess' situation. At the same time, their friendship provides the rather sobering reminder that, when someone is dying, it doesn't mean everyone else's lives can stop.
To borrow an old cliche, it's the relationship between Tess and her neighbor Adam that really pulls at a reader's heartstrings. As Tess and Adam try to connect, first as friends and then as something more, it's kind of heartbreaking to realize they can't always be together.
A lot of recently published novels are written in the present tense. That conceit is particularly appropriate in Before I Die since Tess can truly only live in the present. As I mentioned before, this novel doesn't end happily. But that doesn't make it less brilliant. Downham handles Tessa's death, narrated like the rest of the book in Tessa's voice, in a truly original way. I don't know that this book would be something to give someone who is already depressed over a death, but it does offer an interesting perspective on loss from a radically new perspective.
mehsi's review against another edition
4.0
Tessa en meisje van 16 die nog maar een paar maanden te leven heeft. En wat doe je als je nog maar een paar maanden hebt en nog heel veel wil doen? Je maakt een lijstje, je neemt je beste vriendin en gaat met haar het lijstje af.
Ook het feit dat ondanks dat haar ouders (nou ja voornamelijk haar vader) zich heel veel zorgen maakte en alles voor haar deed(lijkt me aan de ene kant verstikkend voor haar, aan de andere kant moet ze er ook heel blij mee zijn), ging ze toch vaak gewoon weg, verdween, of nam gewoon de auto ondanks dat ze niet kan rijden. Gevolg was dat ze thuis helemaal kapot was, zieker werd en haar vader en haar omgeving helemaal in de stress zaten.
Later in het boek begon ik meer te geven om Tessa. Ik zag haar minder als een egoïstische tiener en meer als iemand die dapper was, bang was en toch probeerde dingen te doen. Ik las hoe haar ziekte haar aantastte, hoe ze steeds zwakker werd, op een gegeven moment ook gewoon boos was om alles. De scene dat ze alles in haar kamer kapotmaakt, haar kleren scheurt, knipt en alles vervolgens uit haar raam gooit vond ik erg krachtig en liet ook zien dat ze het gewoon niet meer uithield.
Ik vond het triest voor haar dat ze zoveel dingen zou gaan missen, ook de geboorte van haar vriendins kindje, waar ze zo graag bij wilde zijn.
Het mooiste, en liefste van het boek van ik dat ze een vriend kreeg, een jongen die van haar hield, met haar sex had, haar lief had en zelfs tot het einde haar mooi vond. Een jongen die niet wegrende toen het teveel werd.
Alles werd ook goed verteld, over de loop van haar ziekte, hoe het begon, wat ze allemaal hebben geprobeerd en ook hoe alles op een gegeven moment niet meer werkte. Over dat ze nu al een tijd in de laatste fase zit en hoe ze zich voelt erover.
Vooral het einde is mooi beschreven, hoe ze langzaam wegzakt, langzaam verdwijnt. Hoe je iedereen om haar heen hoort, ze de laatste dingen zeggen. Het afscheid, hoe Tessa klonk, hoe ze verder en verder afzakte. En hoe het dan, opeens eindigt. Echt heel treurig.
Een laatste ding, ondanks het mooie einde. Ik zou graag een soort extra hoofdstuk willen hebben, een soort van 1 jaar na dato, om te zien hoe het gaat met Adam, met Zoey en haar kindje, maar ook zien hoe het met de familie gaat. Zijn de ouders weer terug bij elkaar? Hoe staat het met haar broertje?
Prachtig boek, een aanrader voor iedereen. Sommige stukjes zijn wat lastiger of minder leuk, maar voor de rest vlieg je door het boek heen. :)
Spoiler
Nou wat vond ik er van. Laten we beginnen bij het begin, het begon goed, het prikkelde me en ik wilde meer lezen. De paginas vlogen voorbij. Tot ze die lijst noemde, de lijst met dingen die ze nog wilde doen voordat ze over een paar maanden doodging. Dingen als sex, drugs, winkeldiefstal/illegale dingen doen, maar ook een dag ja zeggen, of dat haar ouders bij elkaar kwamen. Goede dingen maar ook dingen die niet zo goed zijn. Ergens kan ik me het sex willen best voorstellen.. Maar moet dat met iemand die je niet kent, die alleen maar wilt voor de makkelijke sex?Ook het feit dat ondanks dat haar ouders (nou ja voornamelijk haar vader) zich heel veel zorgen maakte en alles voor haar deed(lijkt me aan de ene kant verstikkend voor haar, aan de andere kant moet ze er ook heel blij mee zijn), ging ze toch vaak gewoon weg, verdween, of nam gewoon de auto ondanks dat ze niet kan rijden. Gevolg was dat ze thuis helemaal kapot was, zieker werd en haar vader en haar omgeving helemaal in de stress zaten.
Later in het boek begon ik meer te geven om Tessa. Ik zag haar minder als een egoïstische tiener en meer als iemand die dapper was, bang was en toch probeerde dingen te doen. Ik las hoe haar ziekte haar aantastte, hoe ze steeds zwakker werd, op een gegeven moment ook gewoon boos was om alles. De scene dat ze alles in haar kamer kapotmaakt, haar kleren scheurt, knipt en alles vervolgens uit haar raam gooit vond ik erg krachtig en liet ook zien dat ze het gewoon niet meer uithield.
Ik vond het triest voor haar dat ze zoveel dingen zou gaan missen, ook de geboorte van haar vriendins kindje, waar ze zo graag bij wilde zijn.
Het mooiste, en liefste van het boek van ik dat ze een vriend kreeg, een jongen die van haar hield, met haar sex had, haar lief had en zelfs tot het einde haar mooi vond. Een jongen die niet wegrende toen het teveel werd.
Alles werd ook goed verteld, over de loop van haar ziekte, hoe het begon, wat ze allemaal hebben geprobeerd en ook hoe alles op een gegeven moment niet meer werkte. Over dat ze nu al een tijd in de laatste fase zit en hoe ze zich voelt erover.
Vooral het einde is mooi beschreven, hoe ze langzaam wegzakt, langzaam verdwijnt. Hoe je iedereen om haar heen hoort, ze de laatste dingen zeggen. Het afscheid, hoe Tessa klonk, hoe ze verder en verder afzakte. En hoe het dan, opeens eindigt. Echt heel treurig.
Een laatste ding, ondanks het mooie einde. Ik zou graag een soort extra hoofdstuk willen hebben, een soort van 1 jaar na dato, om te zien hoe het gaat met Adam, met Zoey en haar kindje, maar ook zien hoe het met de familie gaat. Zijn de ouders weer terug bij elkaar? Hoe staat het met haar broertje?
Prachtig boek, een aanrader voor iedereen. Sommige stukjes zijn wat lastiger of minder leuk, maar voor de rest vlieg je door het boek heen. :)
llawlor's review against another edition
2.0
There were just too many parts of this book that were hard to believe. Not many 16 year olds have college aged friends. Not many dads let their 16 year have a live in boyfriend, even if they are dying. Too many times the story got off track of the true story. Not worth reading.
maitai55's review against another edition
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
4.25
connie_flower's review against another edition
5.0
This book is incredible bittersweet and takes you to a place inside yourself that you don't often let yourself go to - that place where you reflect on your own mortality. But it's profoudly life altering. Tessa's anger and sorrow and grief, and desire to make the most of what she jas really drive you to do the same. Within minutes of her getting through the first of her wish list i was calling my best friend and vowing we live like we have weeks left. This all sounds very morbid, and towards the end it is. Through the final chapter my cheeks were constantly covered in tears, and i sobbed like a baby for at least 5 minutes aafter I'd finished the book. But the story is so beautiful, so unjust and completely perfect tjat it's a must read book. I'm amazed that the author was able to put herself in a position that she has nevrr had to be in, and has had not even a similar experiance to compare it to. Pure talent i think
loulud21's review against another edition
3.0
I wasn't keen on this book until the ending. I did cry though.
valeriianavarr's review against another edition
4.0
Jesus.
Nearly bawled in the middle of the library
Nearly bawled in the middle of the library
taika_tuuli's review against another edition
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.25