teriboop's review
4.0
This is a very poignant story of a Japanese woman, Shoko, who comes of age during WWII. Her family expect her to marry well, even an American, if necessary, much to her brother's chagrin. But she loved an Eta, an untouchable. Decisions are made, the family is torn apart, and a secret follows her to America. Told through the eyes of Shoko and her daughter Sue, How to Be an American Housewife is about family and forgiveness.
This story is very loosely based on author Margaret Dilloway's mother. I enjoyed the writing and was sucked into the story quickly and throughout. It is thought-provoking, yet cheerful, leaving the reader on a hopeful note at the end.
This story is very loosely based on author Margaret Dilloway's mother. I enjoyed the writing and was sucked into the story quickly and throughout. It is thought-provoking, yet cheerful, leaving the reader on a hopeful note at the end.
kblincoln's review
4.0
I went into reading this book with very mixed feelings. On one hand, I really wanted to read about what it would have been like for a Japanese wife one generation earlier than my generation in the United States written by somebody, like Margaret Dilloway, who had first hand knowledge (through her mother.)
On the other hand, I cringe alot at books that address certain stereotypes without providing the detailed depth of knowledge about a situation.
And in some ways, I think this book is both successful and not-so-successful at addressing certain stereotypes about Japan and the Japanese filtered through American-colored glasses.
Each chapter of the book starts out with a chapter from a fictional book with advice about "how to be an American housewife" written supposedly by Japanese women married to Americans. The advice I think rightly reflects the mores of those times, with advice about making sure your children speak only English and to not question the husband to closely about where he goes after work.
And one of the main characters, Shoko (a Japanese girl who left her own country post-WWII and married an American GI) is a living version of this advice. She labors an entire day to make spaghetti sauce, she pampers her son (as it says to do in the book, going with the Japanese way over the American) and tries to make sure her daughter is never embarassed over her potluck casseroles.
And this is one place where the book suceeds. We get the stereotypical "be a demure housewife" advice one would expect from a Japanese-written book of that time, but we get Shoko trying her hardest to fulfill that advice while silently rebelling at the same time, and failing to make friends with the Americans around her.
The book does a great job of showing both Shoko's constant nagging to her daughter, Sue, from both sides of the equation: Sue's feelings of failure and Shoko's loving concern for her daughter.
It is the other parts of the book that don't suceed as well for me. Both Shoko's memories of her life before marrying her husband and then afterwards when her daughter, Sue, travels to Japan to make peace with Shoko's estranged brother.
Sue and her daughter travel to Japan for the first time. And while many of their observations about southern Japan resonated with the ways I experienced Japan for the first time, what it didn't get into were the juicy layers of emotional difficulty, of being an outsider in a culture where that is a very different thing than in the US.
Sue meets up with her gay cousin, another missed opportunity of exploring outsiderness, stays at his house with him (whoa there, hard for me to believe a gay japanese man would just blithely invite his never-before-seen cousin over to his house where it would be impossible to ignore his husband!) and then travels to see her uncle who has for all of Sue's life repudiated and ignored Shoko because of her marriage choices.
And the uncle, Taro, caves, just like that. Again, another missed opportunity for juciy emotional conflict and for Sue to experience what it means to be half-Japanese and not know Japanese culture or language well enough. Missed. Everything works out like a fairy tale.
I felt that the story missed out on many opportunities to give detailed layers to the Japanese-American experience that would help explore the difficulties faced by people of mixed heritage in making a place for themselves in either culture.
However, I realize this is an dissatisfaction based on rather personal reasons, including my own situation as a parent of Japanese-American children. For many Americans without "first-hand" knowledge, I believe the parts about how Shoko struggled to fit in US society would be an eye opener about some less desirable aspects of US culture.
This Book's Food Designation Rating: Niku jagga (Japanese meat and potato stew cooked with miso but based on Western stews) for the different viewpoints of Japanese in America, but that doesn't quite go all the way into the juicy, spicy bits of outsiderness that a full blown Japanese curry would.
On the other hand, I cringe alot at books that address certain stereotypes without providing the detailed depth of knowledge about a situation.
And in some ways, I think this book is both successful and not-so-successful at addressing certain stereotypes about Japan and the Japanese filtered through American-colored glasses.
Each chapter of the book starts out with a chapter from a fictional book with advice about "how to be an American housewife" written supposedly by Japanese women married to Americans. The advice I think rightly reflects the mores of those times, with advice about making sure your children speak only English and to not question the husband to closely about where he goes after work.
And one of the main characters, Shoko (a Japanese girl who left her own country post-WWII and married an American GI) is a living version of this advice. She labors an entire day to make spaghetti sauce, she pampers her son (as it says to do in the book, going with the Japanese way over the American) and tries to make sure her daughter is never embarassed over her potluck casseroles.
And this is one place where the book suceeds. We get the stereotypical "be a demure housewife" advice one would expect from a Japanese-written book of that time, but we get Shoko trying her hardest to fulfill that advice while silently rebelling at the same time, and failing to make friends with the Americans around her.
The book does a great job of showing both Shoko's constant nagging to her daughter, Sue, from both sides of the equation: Sue's feelings of failure and Shoko's loving concern for her daughter.
It is the other parts of the book that don't suceed as well for me. Both Shoko's memories of her life before marrying her husband and then afterwards when her daughter, Sue, travels to Japan to make peace with Shoko's estranged brother.
Sue and her daughter travel to Japan for the first time. And while many of their observations about southern Japan resonated with the ways I experienced Japan for the first time, what it didn't get into were the juicy layers of emotional difficulty, of being an outsider in a culture where that is a very different thing than in the US.
Sue meets up with her gay cousin, another missed opportunity of exploring outsiderness, stays at his house with him (whoa there, hard for me to believe a gay japanese man would just blithely invite his never-before-seen cousin over to his house where it would be impossible to ignore his husband!) and then travels to see her uncle who has for all of Sue's life repudiated and ignored Shoko because of her marriage choices.
And the uncle, Taro, caves, just like that. Again, another missed opportunity for juciy emotional conflict and for Sue to experience what it means to be half-Japanese and not know Japanese culture or language well enough. Missed. Everything works out like a fairy tale.
I felt that the story missed out on many opportunities to give detailed layers to the Japanese-American experience that would help explore the difficulties faced by people of mixed heritage in making a place for themselves in either culture.
However, I realize this is an dissatisfaction based on rather personal reasons, including my own situation as a parent of Japanese-American children. For many Americans without "first-hand" knowledge, I believe the parts about how Shoko struggled to fit in US society would be an eye opener about some less desirable aspects of US culture.
This Book's Food Designation Rating: Niku jagga (Japanese meat and potato stew cooked with miso but based on Western stews) for the different viewpoints of Japanese in America, but that doesn't quite go all the way into the juicy, spicy bits of outsiderness that a full blown Japanese curry would.
books_melissa's review against another edition
adventurous
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
jsh626's review
4.0
I was very pleasantly surprised by this random library pick of mine, because my random picks usually turn out poorly. How to Be an American Housewife is an engaging and poignant story about a Japanese woman who marries an American soldier at the end of WWII and her silent struggle to be accepted by the cultures of both their families. Based loosely on the author's own mother and her experiences, I was drawn into this story right from the start. I love how each chapter starts with snippets from a fictional book (but again, based on an actual book) that gives Japanese wives step by step instructions on how to assimilate. Wonderful details about Japan and the relationship between an American raised daughter and her very traditional Japanese mother. The story gets a little bogged down toward the end, but still a great read.
plaidpladd's review
3.0
I liked the way the narrative jumped around in time, especially the parts centered on World War II-era Japan. It's a perspective I haven't read much from, which is a shame
cook_memorial_public_library's review
4.0
Recommended by Jenny B.
Check our catalog: http://encore.cooklib.org/iii/encore/search/C__Show+to+be+an+american+housewife+dilloway__Orightresult__U1?lang=eng&suite=pearl
Check our catalog: http://encore.cooklib.org/iii/encore/search/C__Show+to+be+an+american+housewife+dilloway__Orightresult__U1?lang=eng&suite=pearl
sharppointysticks's review
3.0
I am fascinate with the traditions and beliefs of other cultures and I love a book that gives me some insight into the lives of others. I enjoyed this book very much. The first half of the book is from the perspective of an old woman looking back on her life. The second half is from her daughter's point of view. Though some parts were a bit predictable it was a quick and enjoyable read. I particularly liked the author's note at the end. When ever a read historical fiction I wonder how much of the story is actually true, I liked that the author gave us some insight into her inspiration.
tobyyy's review
3.0
I will admit, I did read some of the other reviews that people have posted of How to Be an American Housewife prior to writing this review.
I think if you go into this book expecting it to be exciting or suspenseful, then you're going to be disappointed. For me, it was a break from the constant tension innate in the other books that I'm currently reading.
The main thing that made no sense to me was how Shoko still spoke in broken Pidgin English after spending 40+ years in America, with an American husband, raising two children who speak perfectly fine English. I mean, I guess there are people like that...? but it did require me to suspend my disbelief -- especially when Suiko's relatives in Japan spoke flawless English.
I liked the discussion of Nagasaki/Hiroshima and how it affected the people living within the radiation's radius. However, when Suiko says that Nagasaki was "always something that interested her" (paraphrasing) -- that made no sense. Um, okay, but we've only just heard about your interest right now, as you are walking into the park that was created around the site of the explosion in Nagasaki?...
Overall, for me, this was a quiet, relaxing read. I didn't spend a lot of time focusing on what I disliked about it since I wasn't planning on writing a critique of the book. It was interesting enough -- not a 5/5 star absolutely WONDERFUL read -- but nor do I feel like it deserves lower than 3/5 stars from me. I enjoyed reading it, and while I never felt as though I absolutely had to continue reading, it was like an old friend when I picked it back up again.
I would recommend this to anyone, as long as you don't try to compare it to Amy Tan's writing, or as long as you aren't expecting a suspenseful, edge-of-your-seat ride. :)
I think if you go into this book expecting it to be exciting or suspenseful, then you're going to be disappointed. For me, it was a break from the constant tension innate in the other books that I'm currently reading.
The main thing that made no sense to me was how Shoko still spoke in broken Pidgin English after spending 40+ years in America, with an American husband, raising two children who speak perfectly fine English. I mean, I guess there are people like that...? but it did require me to suspend my disbelief -- especially when Suiko's relatives in Japan spoke flawless English.
I liked the discussion of Nagasaki/Hiroshima and how it affected the people living within the radiation's radius. However, when Suiko says that Nagasaki was "always something that interested her" (paraphrasing) -- that made no sense. Um, okay, but we've only just heard about your interest right now, as you are walking into the park that was created around the site of the explosion in Nagasaki?...
Overall, for me, this was a quiet, relaxing read. I didn't spend a lot of time focusing on what I disliked about it since I wasn't planning on writing a critique of the book. It was interesting enough -- not a 5/5 star absolutely WONDERFUL read -- but nor do I feel like it deserves lower than 3/5 stars from me. I enjoyed reading it, and while I never felt as though I absolutely had to continue reading, it was like an old friend when I picked it back up again.
I would recommend this to anyone, as long as you don't try to compare it to Amy Tan's writing, or as long as you aren't expecting a suspenseful, edge-of-your-seat ride. :)
starrburst112's review
3.0
This story was interesting. A mother daughter story about a Japanese woman who moved to America. Definitely readable.
yma718's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
3.25