novella42's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful inspiring reflective medium-paced

5.0

Fantastic book! Lots of good stuff about sexuality, body images, breaking down gender role binaries, and how change works for people over time. (A whole chapter on "but I want my partner to change! Now!" and why it doesn't work that way.) I learned a lot but also felt like it was an accessible read. 

It builds on her first book Come As You Are, but you can start with this one first.

Though the book doesn't set out to explain polyamory, it does that on the way to get where it's going, and I truly appreciated the respectful, no-nonsense depictions of healthy relationships in that context. Lots of really good advice for both monogamous and nonmonogamous people. It does a good job of framing polyam as something that can take a lot of work, and offers great communication tips for both styles. I honestly think it's what I'm gonna recommend for people who ask me about polyam to fix their relationship problems. (Hint, if you have problems in your relationship, adding more people is not the solution you think it will be!)

At any rate, I loved this book. I originally got the hardcopy but ended up borrowing the audiobook from the library to make headway while life got busy. The audiobook is great, full of Nagoski's classic empathy and nonjudgmental hilarity. 

I'm so so grateful I read it!

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grace_b_3's review against another edition

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At the end of the day, the casual writing style just isn’t for me. I felt like I was trying to dig for something of substance and all this book had was fluff. If you’ve read Come as You Are, or any other books in that “your sexuality is normal” genre, you’ve read Come Together. It didn’t really have anything new to say, and it had more of the author’s personal antidotes than Come as You Are.      

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imstephtacular's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny informative medium-paced

4.0


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babyfacedoldsoul's review against another edition

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3.75

I have read all of Nagoski's work and enjoyed doing so. As I have read her other work I found the first part of this book fairly repetitive. I also didn't resonate with the emotional floor layout. I did like the second part of the book though and appreciated her attempts to make it more queer and trans inclusive. The story of Jamie and Rowan really stayed with me. 

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mandi_lea's review against another edition

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hopeful informative lighthearted reflective medium-paced

4.0


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onlyahopelessromantic's review against another edition

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informative inspiring reflective slow-paced

4.0


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helpelbowhittable's review against another edition

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4.5

Great book for people who want to improve their sex lives. It's written by someone who really knows what they are talking about an contains a mixture of science based facts and subjective methods/opinions (that are quite good). Very enlightening, this will change your sex life radically. 

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allisonplus's review against another edition

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informative medium-paced

5.0


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khymihr's review

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funny informative inspiring reflective medium-paced

4.5


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skudiklier's review against another edition

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5.0

I absolutely loved this book. I found it super interesting and I feel like it's helpful for people to read and think about even if you're not in the midst of an active problem you're trying to solve. Nagoski takes a radically open approach to things like sex, desire, and gender, and really breaks down a lot of the socially ingrained things people think they "should" feel or do with regard to sex. This is a perspective I think everyone needs to hear, and I took a lot of notes. Each chapter also helpfully has a tl;dr at the end so you can reference key points later.

Thank you to Netgalley and Ballantine Books for the chance to read and review this ARC.

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