emilieonthemove's review
3.0
3.5 stars. Compelling and frustrating, while I enjoyed reading this book I didn't come away from it with any encouraging pearls of wisdom... We must balance! You can't have it all (or at least be good at everything). Make sure you pick a job you love or you'll be more likely to quit when you have babies. If you do quit your job be ready to pick it back up again when you get divorced in your forties. Bottom line, this is a depressing, confusing time and there's not much to be done about it.
ansella's review
2.0
Well, this book just made me terrified of getting old and convinced that I am going to get divorced and live a miserable lonely life. It spent maybe 8 chapters going over the history of everything, marriage, babies, women in the workplace, but I felt like it didn't really tie all together. In Lean In, I felt like I gained real valuable knowledge from Sheryl Sandberg, but this book just left me a little empty. In the end I felt she didn't quite get to the point of "can women have a fulfilling career while being a mother?" she danced around the issue a lot and used the phrase "men are not the same as women. not better, not worse, just different" a lot and I found it irritating. In the end I think she was trying to placate everyone by not actually giving any opinions on anything, so I felt like I was just reading a dry history book. I gave it two stars because it did make me think about some things but really not much. I found the book underwhelming. Lean In was a MUCH better book.
mmichellemoore's review
3.0
Mixed bag with some good points but some over generalized hand waving instead of analysis in others. The first half was much stronger than the ending
kittarlin's review
3.0
I read books like this in the hopes that someone has some ideas on how to fix or combat the notion that women should actually do it all, and do it all well, now that doing anything is an accepted option. The The author gets there eventually, but spends a lot of time detailing how women pursue perfection. If you're already aware of that cultural expectation, skip to the end. The short version: just stop it already.
mandileighh's review
4.0
Really insightful, lots of interesting feminist history, and doesn't pretend to have easy answers.
sighants's review
I kind of cheated. I read the prologue, the first chapter, along with chapters 7 and 8. I realized that this hit to close too close to home, this is my life right now and I just can't read it...I need some distance. I want to come back, when this year isn't so fresh and my wounds aren't so new from leaving a fellowship behind so that my family could have a solid and sound life.
kristendom's review
3.0
Although there were some great points in this book, I felt as though they were clouded over by the author's very narrow view of what "all women want." In other words, all women want children, a college education, a career, and a man. I don't even know where to start breaking down the flawed perspective it's written from - how about lesbians? Women who don't want children? Women who don't want or have the chance for a college education? The list goes on. And don't get me started on the chapter where she reminisces for the "good old days" when sex gave women power. While it was worth a read as a feminist, it was also highly disappointing and frustrating.
loribeth1961's review
4.0
I wish I had the funds to hand a copy of "WonderWomen: Sex, Power & the Quest for Perfection" by Debora L. Spar to every young woman I know, and to every naysayer who wonders whether feminism is still relevant or needed.
It's not that this book brings any hugely revolutionary ideas or insights to the table -- but it is a readable and well researched summary about how women's lives have evolved over the past 50 years, where we still have work to do and some possible solutions. My copy is full of dog-eared pages.
Spar is President of Barnard College (a prominent American women's college). She is roughly a year or two younger than I am, so her cultural references are mostly quite familiar to me -- e.g., the iconic ad for the 1970s perfume, Charlie (a huge bottle of which once adorned my dresser top). Her book is essentially a tour of the stages of her life -- and my life, and most women's lives of the past 50 years -- from childhood through establishing careers, marriages and families to aging -- and what lessons young women today can & should draw from our experiences.
"Somehow -- without meaning to -- we became convinced... that having it all meant doing it all... And that being good meant being perfect," she says near the beginning of her book. (p. 50) The inflation of expectations, and the quest for perfection and control (versus the promise of liberation) is a running theme throughout the book (thus explaining the subtitle).
Spar is the author of a previous book on reproductive technologies ("The Baby Business: How Money, Science, and Politics Drive the Commerce of Conception," which I have not read) who has experienced birth, pregnancy loss and adoption. She believes that pregnancy, birth and children remain central to most women's lives and are a core issue that make women's lives essentially different from men's -- and that we need to recognize and deal with this difference. As a result, the book includes some interesting discussions about the quest for conception, including ARTs, infertility and pregnancy loss, "pregnancy pornography" and the modern motherhood.
You may not agree with all of her prescriptions, but hers is a thoughtful and welcome voice in the ongoing conversation.
It's not that this book brings any hugely revolutionary ideas or insights to the table -- but it is a readable and well researched summary about how women's lives have evolved over the past 50 years, where we still have work to do and some possible solutions. My copy is full of dog-eared pages.
Spar is President of Barnard College (a prominent American women's college). She is roughly a year or two younger than I am, so her cultural references are mostly quite familiar to me -- e.g., the iconic ad for the 1970s perfume, Charlie (a huge bottle of which once adorned my dresser top). Her book is essentially a tour of the stages of her life -- and my life, and most women's lives of the past 50 years -- from childhood through establishing careers, marriages and families to aging -- and what lessons young women today can & should draw from our experiences.
"Somehow -- without meaning to -- we became convinced... that having it all meant doing it all... And that being good meant being perfect," she says near the beginning of her book. (p. 50) The inflation of expectations, and the quest for perfection and control (versus the promise of liberation) is a running theme throughout the book (thus explaining the subtitle).
Spar is the author of a previous book on reproductive technologies ("The Baby Business: How Money, Science, and Politics Drive the Commerce of Conception," which I have not read) who has experienced birth, pregnancy loss and adoption. She believes that pregnancy, birth and children remain central to most women's lives and are a core issue that make women's lives essentially different from men's -- and that we need to recognize and deal with this difference. As a result, the book includes some interesting discussions about the quest for conception, including ARTs, infertility and pregnancy loss, "pregnancy pornography" and the modern motherhood.
You may not agree with all of her prescriptions, but hers is a thoughtful and welcome voice in the ongoing conversation.