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theinstabookworm's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
First and foremost, if you have been impacted by suicide, approach this book with caution, or maybe skip it.
I've had this book on my shelf for a year and a half. I got in in my Book of the Month box the same month Stephen 'tWitch' Boss died by suicide, but it was too soon to read it then. I've tried to pick it up a few times over the past 18 months, but it's never been the right time. Until now, I guess.
Although I've never lost someone to suicide, I have lost a loved one young (20s) suddenly and unexpectedly. The way Eve's family and friends wanted to be sympathetic, but didn't truly understand her grief, was accurate to when someone dies young. I've also seen how relatives can act like Quentin's mother did and place blame and then how messy things can get when trying to go through the legal process. Grief makes people act in unpredictable ways.
This story was confronting and detailed. The way Quentin took his own life was never specified, but it is alluded to later in the book and the author doesn't hold back. The way feelings of guilt and shame were described added another layer to this story because I think loved ones do blame themselves for missing the signs that their person was struggling. For the most part, I loved Eve's family and friends because even though they didn't understand what she was going through, they still showed up for her in their imperfect, yet consistent, ways.
I regretted that I didn't annotate this from the beginning and have gone back and annotated the lines and quotes that spoke to me. The writing throughout this whole book was beautiful. I'm glad I finally picked this up and stuck with it.
I've had this book on my shelf for a year and a half. I got in in my Book of the Month box the same month Stephen 'tWitch' Boss died by suicide, but it was too soon to read it then. I've tried to pick it up a few times over the past 18 months, but it's never been the right time. Until now, I guess.
Although I've never lost someone to suicide, I have lost a loved one young (20s) suddenly and unexpectedly. The way Eve's family and friends wanted to be sympathetic, but didn't truly understand her grief, was accurate to when someone dies young. I've also seen how relatives can act like Quentin's mother did and place blame and then how messy things can get when trying to go through the legal process. Grief makes people act in unpredictable ways.
This story was confronting and detailed. The way Quentin took his own life was never specified, but it is alluded to later in the book and the author doesn't hold back. The way feelings of guilt and shame were described added another layer to this story because I think loved ones do blame themselves for missing the signs that their person was struggling. For the most part, I loved Eve's family and friends because even though they didn't understand what she was going through, they still showed up for her in their imperfect, yet consistent, ways.
I regretted that I didn't annotate this from the beginning and have gone back and annotated the lines and quotes that spoke to me. The writing throughout this whole book was beautiful. I'm glad I finally picked this up and stuck with it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Suicidal thoughts and Suicide
Moderate: Child death, Racism, Blood, Vomit, Grief, and Death of parent
Minor: Cancer and Car accident
badmom's review against another edition
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Simply put - this is a deeply beautiful account of the vast range of emotional reactions to suicide, and the disparate forms love & support & grief might take. Our narrator is understandably distraught over her husband’s death; his mother’s response, extreme in its ugly vindictiveness, is also shown to be understandable, in a way. Everyone in Q’s orbit is shaken by his death but shows their sorrow in different ways, leaving his widow feeling even more unmoored as she tries (or doesn’t) to find a path forward.
We are treated to the sweet and sometimes bittersweet history of this couple and with that we see the unfolding of characters that reveals layers of relationships. Nwabineli’s writing is subtly astute in the ways it shows growth in even the slightest of characters - she makes us notice everyone and compels us consider their stories within our own stories while allowing connections we might otherwise resist.
We are treated to the sweet and sometimes bittersweet history of this couple and with that we see the unfolding of characters that reveals layers of relationships. Nwabineli’s writing is subtly astute in the ways it shows growth in even the slightest of characters - she makes us notice everyone and compels us consider their stories within our own stories while allowing connections we might otherwise resist.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Emotional abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicide, Blood, Grief, Medical trauma, and Classism
Moderate: Drug use, Vomit, Abandonment, and Alcohol
Minor: Suicidal thoughts, Car accident, Death of parent, Pregnancy, and Gaslighting
soobooksalot's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Someday, Maybe is an amazing debut from Onyi Nwabineli.
Eve has lost her beloved husband, Quentin, to suicide. She found him. There was no note.
We are taken through her agony and grief, and get to know her family and friends as they struggle to keep her above water.
Eve goes through all the reactions from missing Q, to feeling abandoned and guilty for not knowing the "why", and reminiscing about their life together. All the while dealing with one of the more contentious inlaw relationships put to page.
"Closure is not promised. It is a gift, and my husband chose to keep it from me."
Despite the subject matter, Someday, Maybe is also darkly wry.
It's also a look into the different cultures that made up Eve and Quentin's relationship, with Eve's close-knit Nigerian family contrasting Quentin's aloof and unsupportive dynamic.
To sum up, Nwabineli's writing feels absolutely effortless and the characters are brilliantly created. So pleased to have made this my first BOTM pick. Recommended!
Eve has lost her beloved husband, Quentin, to suicide. She found him. There was no note.
We are taken through her agony and grief, and get to know her family and friends as they struggle to keep her above water.
Eve goes through all the reactions from missing Q, to feeling abandoned and guilty for not knowing the "why", and reminiscing about their life together. All the while dealing with one of the more contentious inlaw relationships put to page.
"Closure is not promised. It is a gift, and my husband chose to keep it from me."
Despite the subject matter, Someday, Maybe is also darkly wry.
It's also a look into the different cultures that made up Eve and Quentin's relationship, with Eve's close-knit Nigerian family contrasting Quentin's aloof and unsupportive dynamic.
To sum up, Nwabineli's writing feels absolutely effortless and the characters are brilliantly created. So pleased to have made this my first BOTM pick. Recommended!
Content Warnings
Moderate: Death, Drug use, Racial slurs, Racism, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Blood, Grief, Car accident, Death of parent, Pregnancy, and Alcohol