novemah's review against another edition
4.0
I really like this book because it fully embraces intersectionality, and not enough of the feminist books I've read talk about the ways that race, gender, sexuality, and class intersect (which might mean I need to dig harder to look for them). There were so many quotable quotes that I like so here are just a few:
"When feminism falls short of our expectations, we decide the problem is with feminism rather than the flawed people who act in the name of the movement."
"Some women being empowered does not prove the patriarchy is dead. It proves that some of us are lucky."
"Western opinions on the hijab or burkas are rather irrelevant. We don't get to decide for Muslim women what does or does not oppress them, no matter how highly we think of ourselves." <-- I really like this one. I feel like telling Muslim women not to wear the hijab or burkas is like telling western women to stop wearing high heels and make up because it "oppresses" them. It's really patronizing.
This analogy: "Fifty Shades:BDSM :: McDonald's:Food"
"The thing is, I am not at all sure that feminism has ever suggested women can have it all. This notion of being able to have it all is always misattributed to feminism when really, it's human nature to want it all---to have cake and eat it too without necessarily focusing on how we can get there and how we can make 'having it all' possible for a wider range of people and not just the lucky ones."
In addition to the quotable quotes, there's a recurring theme in her essays about how many TV/movies starring women or people of color have this problem of "having to be everything for everyone". Her essay about the TV show Girls is spot on. Neither Gay nor I is the target audience for Girls, and that's okay. We don't have to like the show just to prove that we're "good" feminists. Also, why aren't people complaining about the lack of diversity in TV shows like Entourage the same way they complain about Girls? I agree with her that Girls (along with many TV shows) is "an uncomfortable reminder of how many people lead lives segregated by race and class."
Out of all the essays, my favorite is "The Last Day of a Young Black Man." It's about Oscar Grant and the movie Fruitvale Station, and it's heartbreaking that essay is still relevant today. I haven't watched the movie yet because I was worried it would just make me curl up in a ball of despair, but based on her essay, I think I might have to give it (and movies like it) a try. Box office success matters for movies like this. They're not like male-centric action movies where flopping at the box office seems to make no difference at all (e.g., Judge Dredd and its equally terrible sequel Dredd). Movies that star multiple women or multiple people of color *have* to do well because otherwise no one will fund the next one.
It brings home the idea that media and pop culture matters. Dissecting and analyzing media and pop culture is important because like it or not, they reflect and have the power to change culture. Representation of LGBT characters on TV and movies has skyrocketed in the past couple of decades, and that cultural shift is not something to take lightly. It's important to pay attention to how women and people of color are represented in the media, and I'm glad that Gay gets that.
"When feminism falls short of our expectations, we decide the problem is with feminism rather than the flawed people who act in the name of the movement."
"Some women being empowered does not prove the patriarchy is dead. It proves that some of us are lucky."
"Western opinions on the hijab or burkas are rather irrelevant. We don't get to decide for Muslim women what does or does not oppress them, no matter how highly we think of ourselves." <-- I really like this one. I feel like telling Muslim women not to wear the hijab or burkas is like telling western women to stop wearing high heels and make up because it "oppresses" them. It's really patronizing.
This analogy: "Fifty Shades:BDSM :: McDonald's:Food"
"The thing is, I am not at all sure that feminism has ever suggested women can have it all. This notion of being able to have it all is always misattributed to feminism when really, it's human nature to want it all---to have cake and eat it too without necessarily focusing on how we can get there and how we can make 'having it all' possible for a wider range of people and not just the lucky ones."
In addition to the quotable quotes, there's a recurring theme in her essays about how many TV/movies starring women or people of color have this problem of "having to be everything for everyone". Her essay about the TV show Girls is spot on. Neither Gay nor I is the target audience for Girls, and that's okay. We don't have to like the show just to prove that we're "good" feminists. Also, why aren't people complaining about the lack of diversity in TV shows like Entourage the same way they complain about Girls? I agree with her that Girls (along with many TV shows) is "an uncomfortable reminder of how many people lead lives segregated by race and class."
Out of all the essays, my favorite is "The Last Day of a Young Black Man." It's about Oscar Grant and the movie Fruitvale Station, and it's heartbreaking that essay is still relevant today. I haven't watched the movie yet because I was worried it would just make me curl up in a ball of despair, but based on her essay, I think I might have to give it (and movies like it) a try. Box office success matters for movies like this. They're not like male-centric action movies where flopping at the box office seems to make no difference at all (e.g., Judge Dredd and its equally terrible sequel Dredd). Movies that star multiple women or multiple people of color *have* to do well because otherwise no one will fund the next one.
It brings home the idea that media and pop culture matters. Dissecting and analyzing media and pop culture is important because like it or not, they reflect and have the power to change culture. Representation of LGBT characters on TV and movies has skyrocketed in the past couple of decades, and that cultural shift is not something to take lightly. It's important to pay attention to how women and people of color are represented in the media, and I'm glad that Gay gets that.
hanjords's review against another edition
4.0
4.5 stars.
‘Like most people, I’m full of contradictions, but I also don’t want to be treated like shit for being a woman’.
An essential read.
‘Like most people, I’m full of contradictions, but I also don’t want to be treated like shit for being a woman’.
An essential read.
jennu__u's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
There's something special about reading a piece of feminist literature almost a decade past its publication. We're able to celebrate small triumphs, like frequency in which we see strong and flawed female characters in entertainment. Like how we hold more people responsible for their actions and their words.
But we can also feel frustration on what hasn't changed. This is the first book I've read involving intersectional feminism - specifically around race. And Gay's arguments are still so extremely current today. While feminism has progressed, I constantly feel like us BIPOC women are still being left behind.
The section that hit the hardest for me was around abortion. This is one of those cases where I don't want to be the one "seeing into the future". Gay celebrates the successful defence of basic abortion rights in America, and I was overcome by the need to protect her and all the women in 2014 from the future we're currently living now. I'm not even American and the overturn of Roe v. Wade felt like a punch in the guts.
Overall, these essays were vulnerable, honest, educational, and incredibly validating. Reading these essays in 2023 only add to their impacts.
But we can also feel frustration on what hasn't changed. This is the first book I've read involving intersectional feminism - specifically around race. And Gay's arguments are still so extremely current today. While feminism has progressed, I constantly feel like us BIPOC women are still being left behind.
The section that hit the hardest for me was around abortion. This is one of those cases where I don't want to be the one "seeing into the future". Gay celebrates the successful defence of basic abortion rights in America, and I was overcome by the need to protect her and all the women in 2014 from the future we're currently living now. I'm not even American and the overturn of Roe v. Wade felt like a punch in the guts.
Overall, these essays were vulnerable, honest, educational, and incredibly validating. Reading these essays in 2023 only add to their impacts.
brynnmcgrail's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
chelseamoretz's review against another edition
emotional
funny
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
dweebess87's review against another edition
informative
reflective
slow-paced
2.0
Mid, not what I was expecting
gcullman's review against another edition
4.0
Incisive critiques of salient popular culture (the movies the help and Django unchained as well as the book lean in) interspersed with some memoir. A bit disjointed all together because the essays were collected from disparate sources. I really appreciate her framing of bad feminist. No one should have to live up to all those standards. I loved her voice: smart suffering no fools and completely irreverent.
alicia88's review against another edition
I wasn’t getting anything from these essays. A lot of them were very surface level and most had to do with topics I was unfamiliar or uninterested in.