marinaschulz's review
dark
emotional
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
0.5
Like many people who read this book I was drawn in by the really cool premise; and, until just about the last 30 pages, I was drawn in by the author's really amazing and captivating style. The author chose a very relatable subject, and I could certainly empathize with a foreigner from a comparatively less developed background being thrown into the deep end of a foreign culture with barely any language skills. Furthermore, the way that the author uses the narrator’s inner monologue to express the emotions and the language progression is truly engrossing, realistic, and often funny.
So why did I rate this book just a stars, when the style and the premise kept me drawn in almost until the end? Because the characters FUCKING SUCK!
So essentially "A concise Chinese-English Dictionary for Lovers" is the story of Z, a 20-something Chinese girl who moves to England, knowing just the rudimentary basics of English. Z had a peasant upbringing, although her family was fortunate enough to somewhere along the way make a large fortune by opening a show factory, and her (rural Chinese) background is the source of much conflict and cultural clash through out the novel.
The reason for the move is barely alluded to in the beginning, at which point we only knew her parents sent her, and the full explanation is only given in the very last chapters, at which a very banal explanation is provided. Honestly, it reads like laziness on the author's part: Guo was so preocuppied with setting up a mood for her novel, that she didn't bother to check whether the set-up made sense or not.
The hook for each chapter is that it starts with the description of some English word that is appropriate to what's happening in the narrative, and which Z doesn't know right away. I actually really enjoyed this device, and the first few chapters are really good, as they describe her experience in a foreign country, her difficulty finding a place to stay and her difficulty making new given the language barrier. Again, very relatable to many people.
The book gets bad once Z’s love interest comes in. The love interest in this particular novel is totally toxic, and, from the moment he shows up, he absolutely dominates the story which should have been about Z. Whay I mean is that almost every single damned paragraph from page 30 onwards involves some variation of "I think of you"; "I wish I could understand you"; "I wonder about your thoughts". It's like Z literally lives for this man, and the novel absolutely lets the ball drop to Hades regarding character development: Z doesn't even have a single friend, or any storyline that doesn't involve this man, or even a part-time job to keep her entertained while he isn't around.
Even the way Z met this man (does he even have a name? I can't remember), is a complete red-flags fiesta. She meets him at the movie-house, and within something like one-week later moves in with him! What?? And the worst thing is that this isn't portrayed as a cautinary tale or creepyness, or even as satire; it's played 100% straight and like he's the love of her life, even though they've only known eachother days!
Making matters worse, on top of them barely knowing eachother, the Man is LITERALLY TWICE HER AGE (he's 40+, she's barely 20), which makes it extra creepy and weird, adds a weird power/money dynamic to the relationship (he makes money, she is inexperienced and lives of her parents). It honestly reads like he is taking advantage of a lonely, young, foreign girl who can't really speak the language. I love romances, and I love when romances grow naturally, but this was just weird. And I haven’t even mentioned the fact that the night they move in, is the night he takes her virginity .
Now, before I get into why I think their relationship is totally toxic, I just want to get into why I think the male love interest is a loser. I have nothing against hippies, and have utmost respect for principled people, even if I don't always agree with said principles. Now, the problem here is that the way that Dude “lives of the edge” and “renounces society” is essentially by refusing to buy at major supermarkets or brands. And that’s fine, but how does that fit into him being a delivery guy for weddings, which are essentially the most capitalist thing ever? So basically, he spends the book being cynical, mean, and putting down Z and the other characters for being consumeristic bad people, but he won't do the very basics of putting his money were his mouth is - by getting a less capitalist job, or even volunteering in his spare time at a non-profit or whatever he desired! In addition, his other core principle appears to be free love, which is also fine. But he uses it as a pretext to live a hedonist lifestyle and using people and treating them poorly aftwewards, which is
not fine . The conclusion of his storyline at the end of the book also made me feel inexplicably angry, since it felt so fake and like he was pretending he had some kind of moral high-ground - after he spent the bulk of the book just being a mean, cynical person. it's also hinted that he got fired from a previous job as a social worker in Asia for fucking someone underaged, which is just gross and adds to the ickyness .
Okay, now that I’ve gotten off my chest how much I hate The Guy and think he is a sleezeball, I can now get into why the relationship dynamic between him and Z is awful. To be fair, some of it is Z’s fault, namely her insistence on refusing to have other friends in general, which makes her partner feel claustrophobic, and her inability to understand some customs, like 50/50 bills between men and women. But then there are clear signs that theirs isn’t a very healthy relationship. For instance, the Man makes everything about him, and takes total control of all the decisions, even if this means backing out of promises at the last minute. Another example: he makes fun of her Is and Rs and mimics her English, which is just hurtful and uncalled-for, given how hard she’s trying and the fact that he hasn’t learnt her language or culture at all.
(pp. 177):
Z: “So you not want to talk to me?”
Dude: “No”
Z: “Why not?”
Dude: “I just want to be on my own to think. (…)”
Z: “Why you not happy? What have I do wrong to you?”
Dude: “I just feel tired of you . Always asking me words, how to spell them (…) It is too tiring to live «like this. I cannot spend my whole time explaining the meaning of words (…) It is so hard for me, I don’t have time and space to think, (…) I don’t have time to be on my own. Now when I talk to other people, I become slower and slower. I am losing my words”.
Well, wtf with blaming other people and being mean??? Seriously, you are blaming the girl for your own lack of intelligence?
And here is another passage I hated, after he complains Z doesn’t do enough at home (because even though she cooks and cleans, she doesn’t vacuum as it's not a piece of equipment she gew up with and thus finds uncomfortable to use).
Dude: Come now! You like a big cock, don’t you, so why don’t you like a big hoover!”
Ugh. Then obviously there is the big contrast between what Z wants, and often brings up (marriage, children in the future, knowing he is committed), and his reluctance on giving her a straight answer. Usually he says something like, “we don’t know what the future holds”, “I can’t tell you what will happen” – which while true, is also annoying. It wouldn’t be hard for him to give her a straight answer, one way or the other, instead of leaving her with false hope. Which like I said, is a power imbalance and emotional manipulation 101 of a lonely, and relationship inexperienced foreign woman.
On to why I hate Z! Well, essentially, it’s aforementioned: she is one of the most passive characters I’ve had the displeasure of reading about in my life. She only makes one decision for herself, and that’s at the end of the book, even if it is a big one. And she still regrets it somewhat, as she appears to have the other (less personally fulfilling) option as a big “what if” moment in her life, even if it was driven by her finally realizing she should choose growth for herself rather than depending on super uncommitted Hippie Dude .
In the meantime, she commits a bunch of bad decisions, most of which boil down to having no ounce of self-preservation and being overly infatuated with men with big cocks and ready to use them. This is most notable during her Interrail across Europe alone, where she magically has sexual connections with at least one man in each city she visits - and hanging out with them is the only thing she does in her Interrail, therefore woefully wasting the trip and not seeing cultural, historic, and fun spots in each place. From the second city onwards, in each place she visits she foregoes staying at a hostel in favour of spending the night SLEEPING IN HER UNDERWEAR in the bed of a man she met the same day. After complaining so much about wanting a serious relationship, she is disappointed when the hot guy in Amsterdam doesn’t want to fuck her, and disgusted that the ugly one in Italy does. Note that she never makes females friends, and appears to have no interest in platonic relationships. The only females mentioned in this book other than Z are two classmates (in passing), her mother (who is abusive and mean), and the English teacher.
Reach the final country, she finally manages to fuck someone!! But then it goes quite horribly, and this plays especially close to my heart as it is literally set in my home land of Portugal. So Z meets a man at a café, who is clearly trying to get into her pants and she is aware of it (pp. 249). She accepts that he give her a tour of Faro, and he then promises to take her to a “special spot on the beach”. There, “pp. 251” “He leads me against the tree, and hugs me and kisses my neck (…) I don’t refuse him. Maybe I also want him (…) I say: “I think I want to have sex with you”.
But then she soon changes her mind, right in the middle of receiving cunninglingus :
pp. 252 “”But no plugging in. Please.” I don’t know how to say that. And I am suddenly scared by what we are doing “No. I don’t want that. Just using sucking me”. .
And like, I don’t even know where to start here! First of all, obviously the guy shouldn’t have kept going after she said no – that’s rape. But she totally knew what she was getting into, she had agreed to sex and knew ahead of time she didn’t have the language skills to back out if she wanted to. Furthermore, in my opinion, “I am just using you for oral sex, and I will be the only one to get off” is also a pretty weird and selfish thing to say when you're in the middle of a consensual hook-up, and it would be weird regardless of if the person who said this was a man or a woman. And if that's where your bounderies are, fine, but let's be honest that not all guys are respectfully, and you are literally putting yourself in danger by saying one thing to a hook-up and then backing out WHILE you are already hooking up.
Other icky moments set in Portugal include the objectification of a young backpacker in a tight T-shirt, as viewed by old men oggling her (which Z describes as: pp. 241 Her young lively breasts drag those local man’s eyes. As she disappears into the end of the street, two old mans withdrawn back their eyes. It must be a pleasure for them, seeing a young active breast under the lemon T-shirt”. ) Also, the moment when Z masturbates in public in a beach in the Algarve was disgusting to me and sends a very unappealing message. The moment is meant to be empowering: her getting in tune with her own body, “becoming the master of her own orgasms” (albeit that this precedes fucking the Portuguese guy, which makes that moment all the more baffling) but its really gross considering how it’s a family preferred destination with many many children…
In short, maybe the author has other books that are better. Her style is good and captivating, and the language hook was really interesting to read. But all of that sexism, as well as some racism, made it an impossible read for me. I seriously think that rather than “A Concise Chinese-English Dictionary for Lovers” this could be called “A Book about a Chinese Girl with no Will-Power getting into an Abusive Relationship and Becoming Addicted to Sex”.
So why did I rate this book just a stars, when the style and the premise kept me drawn in almost until the end? Because the characters FUCKING SUCK!
So essentially "A concise Chinese-English Dictionary for Lovers" is the story of Z, a 20-something Chinese girl who moves to England, knowing just the rudimentary basics of English. Z had a peasant upbringing, although her family was fortunate enough to somewhere along the way make a large fortune by opening a show factory, and her (rural Chinese) background is the source of much conflict and cultural clash through out the novel.
The reason for the move is barely alluded to in the beginning, at which point we only knew her parents sent her, and the full explanation is only given in the very last chapters, at which a very banal explanation is provided. Honestly, it reads like laziness on the author's part: Guo was so preocuppied with setting up a mood for her novel, that she didn't bother to check whether the set-up made sense or not.
The hook for each chapter is that it starts with the description of some English word that is appropriate to what's happening in the narrative, and which Z doesn't know right away. I actually really enjoyed this device, and the first few chapters are really good, as they describe her experience in a foreign country, her difficulty finding a place to stay and her difficulty making new given the language barrier. Again, very relatable to many people.
The book gets bad once Z’s love interest comes in. The love interest in this particular novel is totally toxic, and, from the moment he shows up, he absolutely dominates the story which should have been about Z. Whay I mean is that almost every single damned paragraph from page 30 onwards involves some variation of "I think of you"; "I wish I could understand you"; "I wonder about your thoughts". It's like Z literally lives for this man, and the novel absolutely lets the ball drop to Hades regarding character development: Z doesn't even have a single friend, or any storyline that doesn't involve this man, or even a part-time job to keep her entertained while he isn't around.
Even the way Z met this man (does he even have a name? I can't remember), is a complete red-flags fiesta. She meets him at the movie-house, and within something like one-week later moves in with him! What?? And the worst thing is that this isn't portrayed as a cautinary tale or creepyness, or even as satire; it's played 100% straight and like he's the love of her life, even though they've only known eachother days!
Making matters worse, on top of them barely knowing eachother, the Man is LITERALLY TWICE HER AGE (he's 40+, she's barely 20), which makes it extra creepy and weird, adds a weird power/money dynamic to the relationship (he makes money, she is inexperienced and lives of her parents). It honestly reads like he is taking advantage of a lonely, young, foreign girl who can't really speak the language. I love romances, and I love when romances grow naturally, but this was just weird. And I haven’t even mentioned the fact that the night they move in, is the night he takes her virginity .
Now, before I get into why I think their relationship is totally toxic, I just want to get into why I think the male love interest is a loser. I have nothing against hippies, and have utmost respect for principled people, even if I don't always agree with said principles. Now, the problem here is that the way that Dude “lives of the edge” and “renounces society” is essentially by refusing to buy at major supermarkets or brands. And that’s fine, but how does that fit into him being a delivery guy for weddings, which are essentially the most capitalist thing ever? So basically, he spends the book being cynical, mean, and putting down Z and the other characters for being consumeristic bad people, but he won't do the very basics of putting his money were his mouth is - by getting a less capitalist job, or even volunteering in his spare time at a non-profit or whatever he desired! In addition, his other core principle appears to be free love, which is also fine. But he uses it as a pretext to live a hedonist lifestyle and using people and treating them poorly aftwewards, which is
not fine . The conclusion of his storyline at the end of the book also made me feel inexplicably angry, since it felt so fake and like he was pretending he had some kind of moral high-ground - after he spent the bulk of the book just being a mean, cynical person. it's also hinted that he got fired from a previous job as a social worker in Asia for fucking someone underaged, which is just gross and adds to the ickyness .
Okay, now that I’ve gotten off my chest how much I hate The Guy and think he is a sleezeball, I can now get into why the relationship dynamic between him and Z is awful. To be fair, some of it is Z’s fault, namely her insistence on refusing to have other friends in general, which makes her partner feel claustrophobic, and her inability to understand some customs, like 50/50 bills between men and women. But then there are clear signs that theirs isn’t a very healthy relationship. For instance, the Man makes everything about him, and takes total control of all the decisions, even if this means backing out of promises at the last minute. Another example: he makes fun of her Is and Rs and mimics her English, which is just hurtful and uncalled-for, given how hard she’s trying and the fact that he hasn’t learnt her language or culture at all.
(pp. 177):
Z: “So you not want to talk to me?”
Dude: “No”
Z: “Why not?”
Dude: “I just want to be on my own to think. (…)”
Z: “Why you not happy? What have I do wrong to you?”
Dude: “I just feel tired of you . Always asking me words, how to spell them (…) It is too tiring to live «like this. I cannot spend my whole time explaining the meaning of words (…) It is so hard for me, I don’t have time and space to think, (…) I don’t have time to be on my own. Now when I talk to other people, I become slower and slower. I am losing my words”.
Well, wtf with blaming other people and being mean??? Seriously, you are blaming the girl for your own lack of intelligence?
And here is another passage I hated, after he complains Z doesn’t do enough at home (because even though she cooks and cleans, she doesn’t vacuum as it's not a piece of equipment she gew up with and thus finds uncomfortable to use).
Dude: Come now! You like a big cock, don’t you, so why don’t you like a big hoover!”
Ugh. Then obviously there is the big contrast between what Z wants, and often brings up (marriage, children in the future, knowing he is committed), and his reluctance on giving her a straight answer. Usually he says something like, “we don’t know what the future holds”, “I can’t tell you what will happen” – which while true, is also annoying. It wouldn’t be hard for him to give her a straight answer, one way or the other, instead of leaving her with false hope. Which like I said, is a power imbalance and emotional manipulation 101 of a lonely, and relationship inexperienced foreign woman.
On to why I hate Z! Well, essentially, it’s aforementioned: she is one of the most passive characters I’ve had the displeasure of reading about in my life. She only makes one decision for herself, and that’s at the end of the book, even if it is a big one. And she still regrets it somewhat, as she appears to have the other (less personally fulfilling) option as a big “what if” moment in her life, even if it was driven by her finally realizing she should choose growth for herself rather than depending on super uncommitted Hippie Dude .
In the meantime, she commits a bunch of bad decisions, most of which boil down to having no ounce of self-preservation and being overly infatuated with men with big cocks and ready to use them. This is most notable during her Interrail across Europe alone, where she magically has sexual connections with at least one man in each city she visits - and hanging out with them is the only thing she does in her Interrail, therefore woefully wasting the trip and not seeing cultural, historic, and fun spots in each place. From the second city onwards, in each place she visits she foregoes staying at a hostel in favour of spending the night SLEEPING IN HER UNDERWEAR in the bed of a man she met the same day. After complaining so much about wanting a serious relationship, she is disappointed when the hot guy in Amsterdam doesn’t want to fuck her, and disgusted that the ugly one in Italy does. Note that she never makes females friends, and appears to have no interest in platonic relationships. The only females mentioned in this book other than Z are two classmates (in passing), her mother (who is abusive and mean), and the English teacher.
Reach the final country, she finally manages to fuck someone!! But then it goes quite horribly, and this plays especially close to my heart as it is literally set in my home land of Portugal. So Z meets a man at a café, who is clearly trying to get into her pants and she is aware of it (pp. 249). She accepts that he give her a tour of Faro, and he then promises to take her to a “special spot on the beach”. There, “pp. 251” “He leads me against the tree, and hugs me and kisses my neck (…) I don’t refuse him. Maybe I also want him (…) I say: “I think I want to have sex with you”.
But then she soon changes her mind, right in the middle of receiving cunninglingus :
pp. 252 “”But no plugging in. Please.” I don’t know how to say that. And I am suddenly scared by what we are doing “No. I don’t want that. Just using sucking me”. .
And like, I don’t even know where to start here! First of all, obviously the guy shouldn’t have kept going after she said no – that’s rape. But she totally knew what she was getting into, she had agreed to sex and knew ahead of time she didn’t have the language skills to back out if she wanted to. Furthermore, in my opinion, “I am just using you for oral sex, and I will be the only one to get off” is also a pretty weird and selfish thing to say when you're in the middle of a consensual hook-up, and it would be weird regardless of if the person who said this was a man or a woman. And if that's where your bounderies are, fine, but let's be honest that not all guys are respectfully, and you are literally putting yourself in danger by saying one thing to a hook-up and then backing out WHILE you are already hooking up.
Other icky moments set in Portugal include the objectification of a young backpacker in a tight T-shirt, as viewed by old men oggling her (which Z describes as: pp. 241 Her young lively breasts drag those local man’s eyes. As she disappears into the end of the street, two old mans withdrawn back their eyes. It must be a pleasure for them, seeing a young active breast under the lemon T-shirt”. ) Also, the moment when Z masturbates in public in a beach in the Algarve was disgusting to me and sends a very unappealing message. The moment is meant to be empowering: her getting in tune with her own body, “becoming the master of her own orgasms” (albeit that this precedes fucking the Portuguese guy, which makes that moment all the more baffling) but its really gross considering how it’s a family preferred destination with many many children…
In short, maybe the author has other books that are better. Her style is good and captivating, and the language hook was really interesting to read. But all of that sexism, as well as some racism, made it an impossible read for me. I seriously think that rather than “A Concise Chinese-English Dictionary for Lovers” this could be called “A Book about a Chinese Girl with no Will-Power getting into an Abusive Relationship and Becoming Addicted to Sex”.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexism
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