Reviews tagging 'Deadnaming'

Good Morning, Monster: A Therapist Shares Five Heroic Stories of Emotional Recovery by Catherine Gildiner

11 reviews

mxfrog's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective sad tense medium-paced

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Cancer, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Incest, Infertility, Mental illness, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Terminal illness, Violence, Grief, Religious bigotry, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Murder, and Gaslighting

throwback682's review against another edition

dark reflective medium-paced

2.75

As others have mentioned, this book has lots of problems, including the audiobook narrator putting on Chinese and First Nations accents, deadnaming and other transphobic comments, among others. There were just so many times that I cringed. The author at times seemed self aware but often was just painfully out of touch. The book did feel rather exploitative, and often felt fake. I felt like it was particularly insensitive about sexual abuse, for example the way the author distinguished between “violent” sexual abuse and… what?? It’s all violent! I think I agree with other people who called the book trauma porn. I did (enjoy doesn’t seem like the right word) parts of the book. I did gain some understanding into how childhood trauma can impact people, and felt hopeful at times that I and people I love can heal from difficult things. But overall the book felt pretty icky. I’m kind of shocked how many people uncritically loved it. Definitely read with caution especially if you’re a survivor of abuse, especially sexual abuse or child abuse generally. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Confinement, Deadnaming, Eating disorder, Genocide, Incest, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Transphobia, Religious bigotry, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Gaslighting, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Dysphoria

Moderate: Adult/minor relationship, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Cancer, Drug use, Infidelity, Excrement, Suicide attempt, and Murder

Minor: Sexual content, Vomit, and Dementia

This book is all about people who have overcome HORRIFIC things, mostly in their childhoods. It is very very difficult to read.

serinehart's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful medium-paced

4.5

I think people's use of the label "trauma porn" is an expression of their own personal sensitivities and morality more than a helpful descriptor. This book is ultimately optimistic in showing therapeutic case studies of individuals who improved into better circumstances, which I found to be an emotional bolster, personally. The author does characterize these stories as those overcoming adversity. But I wonder if the public reception is positive because of the analytic lens to the detailed horrors of these individuals' lives of that of a health care worker. I'm thinking in contrast to Hanya Yanigahara's A Little Life, a work of fiction that describes a character's life details that are entirely similar to Gildiner's clients real lives. Is "trauma porn," i.e., the fear that we or others may get some perverse pleasure in the torture of others, only applicable to stories that are not real, that have a happy ending, or that are perceived to be handled by an author with good intent to serve some (read: higher) purpose? This was something I was thinking about while reading, due to it's obvious similarities to A Little Life and how the content of that book was received by the public as controversial. Which is not to defend "trauma porn" as a genre, but as a label, since it strikes me as entirely subjective. Or possibly symptomatic of a societal squeamishness with the details of trauma, and therefore a lack of understanding or being able to address it properly when it happens in our communities. And my moral sense personally is suspicious of censorship, which doesn't leave room for differences in reading experience or interpretation. But of course be mindful of your own sensitivities.

I've currently been reading and listening to podcasts on therapy cases and transcripts for their optimism and demonstrated conflict resolution in action, especially with how therapists honor people's emotional inner worlds and respond to most everything with compassion and respect, even when disagreeing. This one was challenging to read, but also reassuring in its level-headed approach to lived horrors and plotted progression of clients' improvements, suggesting that no one is so broken that their life cannot be improved. Of course this is an oversimplification, but something I hold on to to counteract my own depression.

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Animal cruelty, Child abuse, Confinement, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Incest, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Transphobia, Vomit, Trafficking, Religious bigotry, and Abandonment

adrianna_0623's review against another edition

dark emotional informative sad tense medium-paced

3.0

massive tw, proceed with caution and if you choose to read this take it slow

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Animal death, Child abuse, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Abandonment, and Alcohol

jojobdot's review against another edition

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Deadnaming and Transphobia

In the section on Alana, the author starts out deadnaming the subject's partner and clumsily discussing her transition, and later describes

Alana's choice of a trans partner as fulfilling her desire for parental care from her mother AND father in one person.

Gross, inappropriate, and frankly it makes me wonder if the author got permission from this woman to be included in the book.

michellebub's review against another edition

emotional informative inspiring slow-paced

2.75

CHECK THE TRIGGER WARININGS

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Confinement, Deadnaming, Eating disorder, Incest, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Xenophobia, Religious bigotry, Suicide attempt, and Abandonment

Moderate: Vomit

Minor: Transphobia

tessazwaan's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective fast-paced

3.0

Okay tbh I loved this book for its readability - easy to read (tbf very intense traumatic stories so look at the trigger warnings first), very interesting and the cases so extreme that you want to  keep reading. However, to me it was problematic too, which is why I give this only three stars. 

First and foremost, I hate the emphasis on being “strong” (read: cope with excessive working, shutting off feelings and function “normally” in a kapitalist society). The sentence “She had to be tough, otherwise she would have formed a disorder” perfectly describes the tone of the book. 

Secondly, as a therapist, I feel like you should refrain from labelling people’s feeling as “whiny” or “needy”, especially since the people being called whiny and needy were severely abused. Sentences along the lines of “I wish people could hear this story when they are in my office complaining about insignificant childhood events” just don’t sit right with me. It’s disrespectful and lacks empathy, especially coming from a clinical psychologist. 

Third, there is some transphobia in this book. There’s deadnaming someone, only referring to her as a her after her surgeries and seeing a transgender woman explicitly as someone who could fulfill both a male and female role. I could have really done without that part, it also felt super unnecessary to add, since she wasn’t even a main character. 

Last but not least, how do you get consent to publish a life story from a dead man? Especially one from an Indigenous culture where keeping low profile is key? And this story was detailled as fuck? It felt just like she picked the most extreme stories to put in her book so her book could get as much shock effect as possible. 

So yeah, for me those issues took this from a five star review to three. I would recommend to read Maybe You Should Talk To Someone by Lori Gottlieb over this book any day. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Bullying, Child abuse, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Incest, Mental illness, Grief, Death of parent, and Abandonment

botanicalprofanity's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective sad tense

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Body horror, Body shaming, Bullying, Cancer, Child abuse, Confinement, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Incest, Mental illness, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Kidnapping, Grief, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Abandonment, and Colonisation

greatu's review against another edition

dark emotional inspiring reflective

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Body horror, Body shaming, Cancer, Child abuse, Child death, Confinement, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Genocide, Incest, Infertility, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Torture, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Vomit, Medical content, Grief, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Gaslighting, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment

grannyweatherwax's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring reflective sad medium-paced

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Animal death, Child abuse, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Incest, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Transphobia, Violence, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Gaslighting, and Abandonment

Moderate: Addiction, Alcoholism, Vomit, Abandonment, and Alcohol