Reviews with content warning for Adult/minor relationship - Kings Rising

I'm going to assume if you're reading a review of the third book in a trilogy, you understand the content warnings and I can dispense with the spoiler-hiding at this point. This is also by far the longest review I've ever written or probably ever will write. It's both a review of Kings Rising and closing thoughts on the trilogy, as it really is just one long, non-stop story. It is, on the surface, the story of Damianos of Akielos, but Laurent of Vere is the character who gradually takes shape, who gradually won my heart while Damen had it easily already from the prologue.

I knew shit was about to get real when we got our first-ever Laurent POV. Naturally, Laurent immediately broke my heart when he spent that POV being tortured, expecting to die, expecting Damen to believe him a betrayer, talking to his captor about this man he was supposed to meet who has all these ideas about honor and fairness, and then when they finally make it back to each other… well. Laurent is still Laurent. As badly as I ached for him to fall against Damen and tell him everything and accept care and tenderness, he genuinely didn’t know how at this point. The farce of everything having gone to his cold, calculated plan is the only way he knew to stay safe and alive.

Laurent is in love with the man who killed Auguste, and there’s a way to look at what happened and see that Auguste and a young Damianos were both doing what they believed wholeheartedly was right. There’s a way to love both of them without losing himself, but he doesn’t know how yet, early in this third volume. He only knows how to use his love for Damen as a sharp object to hurt himself and Damen both. It’s the same way he binds himself painfully tightly into his past. The boy he was, so profoundly alone after Marlas, would have been desperate for love and attention, and the man he is now blames himself, locks his whole heart and soul down into austerity, for the way his uncle twisted those emotions so he could use Laurent.

Damen has told Laurent before that he makes mistakes when he loses control. What Damen means in those situations is, when Laurent loses control and lashes out, hurting others. I think what Laurent hears and believes is he has to keep control and never feel any emotion at all, because all emotion will be a mistake. As far as his life has taught him, needing another person has only ever brought him pain.

As the painful beginning gave way to their wary partnership, I felt a strange combination of pride and ache to watch Laurent, Prince of Vere and Damianos, King of Akielos publicly join forces and work together - working carefully, in private, to be only that to each other.

Laurent getting staggering drunk with Makedon was lovely. Damen pouring Laurent into bed after was painfully sweet. Yes, uncle made me cry and have to stop reading for a while and do something else. I hate being right about awful things.

Pacat’s writing mastery shows itself in the layering of Laurent’s past into his personality and actions, and that is more evident than ever in this third installment. In every precious, stolen moment he and Damen have to really talk to each other (before war or whatever unimportant political nonsense interrupts their obviously more important feelings-having), Laurent says or does things that stab right through my heart and simultaneously sail right over Damen’s sweet, oblivious head. Especially in the conversation where Damen talks about having hurt Laurent by killing Auguste, telling him that he didn’t deserve what he went through, it’s achingly clear that Damen is referring to losing a brother and Laurent is hearing something more.

And then at last, Laurent lets out a few measured truths about his experiences of Damen to Jokaste, only realizing after the fact that Damen has heard him. That, and their shared reaction to her other news, finally knocks out a little of that cautious control, and it’s glorious. When you make love to me like that, I can't think, and I don't toy with you, and so much more. It's just perfect. They're perfect together.

There are always details when they get physical that make it clear what was done to Laurent when he was young, and those details stab me right in my soul and sail, once again, right over Damen’s head. In spite of those details, and sometimes even because of them, it's just intensely joyful to see these two together. Laurent learning to love and be loved for the first time in his life, and Damen taking that experience on with confident delight as his own pleasure and privilege, take my breath away. It’s wild to think back to Captive Prince, when I was positive this series was miscategorized as romance. I remember reading that book and hating Laurent so much that I thought I had made a mistake in buying it, thinking I could never like this man even a little, until I finally started to really see him and see his deepest hurts take shape. The road was rough, but I'm so glad Damen made it here with him.

From there, it’s a mad rush barreling to a conclusion that, as I suspected for some time, made me want to tear the Regent’s various organs out with my bare hands, and then feed them to him. Slowly. I don’t know if I’ve ever been so furious and disgusted with a fictional character, or as protective of one as I am of Laurent. As I have been throughout the series, I’m right there with Damen, sharing all of his emotions and joys and desires to see the Regent die badly on the end of his sword. I felt you were dead the moment you laid hands on him in my bones. Me too, Damen. Me fucking too.

The conclusion of the whole trilogy’s story arc is incredibly satisfying, from the gathering of forces behind the golden prince who believed himself forever alone, to the ghostly symmetry in Kastor’s defeat. I wanted to stand up and cheer in my house at because Laurent wasn’t Auguste.

And, yeah. It was one kingdom, once. Yes. It was.

✨ 👑 🦁

When I had finished this final volume, I had to go back and read some of the passages again where we see Laurent finally start to show himself, piece by piece. One of the most harrowing and telling scenes for me is in Prince's Gambit, when he verbally shreds Aimeric to bits. Laurent is a master of bloodless violence, and this scene is the verbal equivalent of having Damen whipped on the cross - but why? Aimeric didn't kill Auguste, or unknowingly put a young and helpless Laurent in the hands of the Regent.

The problem with Aimeric is that he still clings to the fantasy. Laurent can try to befriend and allow himself to feel compassion for Nicaise, for example, because Nicaise has no illusions of tenderness between himself and the Regent; he understands his position and its approaching expiration date for what they are. Laurent's behavior toward Aimeric is much more like that of Nicaise's behavior toward everyone else. It's representative of the hard, cynical fourteen-year-old Laurent became, full of sharp hurts and spiked pitfalls ready to stab anyone who believed the Regent capable of feeling, the way he had probably believed it in the days, weeks, months after Marlas.

There would have been a period of time when Laurent was being horrifically abused and still trying to find love and solace in it, and I would bet he hasn't stopped blaming or punishing himself for that since. There's even a frisson of jealousy here because he remembers his uncle's absence during the time he had spent with Aimeric in their youth, and Laurent wants to punish himself for caring about that too. It's that same punishment that we see him level with unbelievable viciousness against Aimeric in this scene: you sad, pathetic child, you still want to believe he loves you. I can only imagine what he was about to unleash on Jord for loving and defending this young man so desperate to have the Regent's love.

And then Damen, who once again adeptly observes what's in front of him without needing to know the full context, stops him short. He protects Jord, Aimeric, Laurent from himself, and says go ahead and take a shot at me, if you need to, but you know I'll defend myself. Laurent stands there and seethes, hating Damen for seeing him so clearly, and also loving him for it, and hating that he loves him for it. Probably also desperate to speak the truth to someone, finally just let it all out like lancing a boil, cry, scream, but he can't, except - he does, just a little.

It's shocking to see Laurent let out a burst of emotion enough to sweep everything off the table, an uncharacteristic release of fury at the shattering waves of damage his uncle has caused, and then he does admit that memory to Damen, of the time when his uncle had been away at Aimeric's family home. Damen doesn't know enough about Laurent's past yet to understand it, and it might be a very long time before he thinks back on all of this and puts the pieces together, but this felt like an even more intimate moment than their first kiss.

And now that we've mentioned that kiss... The other things I had to reread were the scenes of intimacy and Laurent's Herculean struggles to let go of his control, to give himself to Damen. Going back through these scenes with the full picture of Laurent as a young man who has only ever had sex as something used against him, for someone else to get off, is overwhelming. His actions carry a desperate want for this kind, good looking man to show him how different it can be, but also so much fear. You can just read how much and how often Laurent has been hurt. It breaks my heart wide open. I love Damen for his drive to give as much pleasure as he takes (I think I nearly, actually swooned at I want you to come in my arms, good LORD), and he clearly and quickly gets the idea that whatever Laurent's prior experiences have been, they were not positive. I love him for finding a line to walk between prying too much, and steamrolling over raw hurts so they can both get laid.

I paid special attention to the two sections in which Laurent ventures to figure out what he even likes in lovemaking - because he has no way of knowing, because he is painfully familiar with the mechanics of sex acts, having been used for all of them, but never a willing or equal participant in them. I know I keep beating that horse, but it just yanks right on the core of my heart and doesn't let go. It's skillful how Pacat shows us so much of what Laurent lived through, just through his words and behavior, even though it's only one single, vile act that gets confirmed outright in the story.

In both of those scenes, Laurent begins by telling Damen, Don't touch me, and I have to assume that he expects the wrong touch at the wrong time to cause a fear response. As I read those scenes again, I would remind myself: this is probably the first time he's touched another person because he wants to, for pleasure; when Damen kissed him on the battlement earlier that might have been his first kiss; this seems like the first time someone has kissed his neck and made him feel beautiful. The reason for it is gut-wrenching, but in the moment, it's just the sweetest thing I've ever read, to witness those firsts. (Note from Future Me: Damen happens to mention later, in the short story The Summer Palace, that he likes how Laurent kisses him - as if Damen is the only person he's ever kissed or ever wants to kiss. Honestly, Damen, that might be the case, dude.)

And Damen, for all that he doesn't understand the reasons for it, he listens and sees and he meets Laurent where he is and loves him there, openly and honestly. It would be natural for him to have questions, or to do something innocuous that could hurt someone in that vulnerable of a moment, but he doesn't - he is content to be a safe, solid presence for Laurent to love on and experience as he wrestles with his own mind.

What an intense ride it’s been. I will definitely follow this with up the Summer Palace short story collection, but I’m about to be very sad to say goodbye to these characters. Laurent has a permanent home in my heart, and as he can't be stopped from following Laurent everywhere, so does Damen.

✨ 💕 🦁

Favorite quotes, which I will try and fail to keep from being half of the book:

"There was a man I was supposed to meet. He's got all these ideas about honour and fair play, and he tries to keep me from doing the wrong thing. But he's not here right now. Unfortunately for you."

Nikandros held his gaze, then let out a breath and passed his hand over his face, massaging it briefly. He said, "The Prince of Vere." When he looked at Damen again, it was a sidelong glance under his raised brows, and for a moment they were boys again, on the sawdust, throwing spears that fell six feet short of the men's hide targets.
"Can you imagine," said Nikandros, "what your father would say if he knew?"
"Yes," said Damen. "Which girl from the village was called Kyra?"
"They all were. Damianos. You can't trust him."
"I know that." He finished the wine. Outside, there were hours of daylight left, and work to be done. "You've spent a morning with him and you're warning me off. Just wait," said Damen, "until you've spent a full day with him."
"You mean that he improves with time?"
"Not exactly," said Damen.

"I know you're not cold," said Damen. "You weren't cold when you ordered me tied to the post. You weren't cold when you pushed me down on your bed."

Laurent acted without hesitation. He released his reins - and as Damen watched, as the spear flew right for him - he jumped, not out of the way, but into the path of the spear, leaping from his horse to Pallas's, dragging them both to the left. Pallas swayed, shocked, and Laurent bodily kept him down low in the saddle. The spear sailed past them and landed in the tufted grass like a javelin.
The crowd went wild.
Laurent ignored it. Laurent reached down and neatly filched Pallas's last spear for himself. And, keeping Pallas's horse at a gallop - as the sounds of the crowd swelled to a crescendo - he threw it, sending it flying right into the centre of the final target.
Completing the okton one spear ahead of Pallas and of Damen, Laurent drew his horse up in a little circle, and met Damen's gaze, his pale brows rising, as if to say, "Well?"
Damen grinned. He hefted the spear he had caught, and from where he was on the far side of the course, threw; let it go sailing over the full, impossible length of the field, to thunk into the target alongside Laurent's spear, where it rested, quivering.
Pandemonium.

"You have the mind of a snake," Makedon said.
"You have the mind of an old bull," said Laurent.
They stared at one another.
After a long moment, Makedon waved at the slave, who came forward with a fat-bellied bottle of Akielon spirits and two shallow cups.
"I will drink with you," said Makedon.

"I tried to kill you. I can't seem to go through with it. You keep overturning all my plans."

"One cup of griva and you slept like the dead," said Makedon. He clapped Laurent's shoulder again. "This one had six! Can you doubt the power of his will? The steadiness of his arm in the hunt?"
"Not your uncle's griva," said a horrified voice.
"With two such as us on the ride, there won't be a chamois left in the mountains." Another shoulder clap. "We go now to Karthas to prove our worth in battle."
This provoked a wave of soldierly camaraderie. Laurent did not typically engage in soldierly camaraderie, and did not know what to do.

"Did I," Laurent said. It took him a long time to push the words out. "Say anything."
Laurent held himself taut, as if for flight. He lifted his eyes to meet Damen's.
"You said you missed me," said Damen.
Laurent flushed, hard, the change in colour startling.
"I see. Thank you for-" He could see Laurent taste the edges of the statement. "-resisting my advances."
In the silence, he could hear voices beyond the door that had nothing to do with the two of them, or the honesty of the moment that almost hurt, as if they stood again in Laurent's chambers by the bed.
"I miss you too," he said. "I'm jealous of Isander."
"Isander's a slave."
"I was a slave."
The moment ached. Laurent met his gaze, his eyes too clear.
"You were never a slave, Damianos. You were born to rule, as I was."

To have his people mistrust him, to have his friends turn from him, to have the thing that had been most dear and good in his life twisted into a weapon to hurt-
He turned. Laurent was standing alone, against the backdrop of the hall.
With sudden double vision, Damen saw Laurent as he was, the true isolation. The Regent had done this to Laurent, had whittled away his support, had turned his people against him. He remembered trying to convince Laurent of the Regent's benevolence in Arles, as naive as Estienne. Laurent had had a lifetime of this.

When he made himself look at Laurent, Laurent's eyes on him were very dark, his voice quiet.
"How can you trust me, after what your own brother did to you?"
"Because he was false," said Damen, "and you are true. I have never known a truer man." He said, into the stillness, "I think if I gave you my heart, you would treat it tenderly."
Laurent turned his head, denying Damen his face. Damen could see his breathing. After a moment he said in a low voice, "When you make love to me like that, I can't think."
"Don't think," said Damen.

"Don't," said Laurent, "toy with me. I—have not the means to—defend against this."
"I don't toy with you."

“It’s me," said Damen. "It’s me, here with you. Say my name."
"Damianos."

"I would court you," said Damen, "with all the grace and courtesy that you deserve."
He undid the first lace on Laurent's shirt, and the fabric began to open, a glimpse of the hollow of his throat. Laurent's lips were parted, his breath hardly stirring.
Damen said, "There'd be no lies between us."
He opened the second lace, felt the low throb of his own pulse, the warmth of Laurent's skin as his fingers moved to the third.
"We'd have time," Damen said, "to be together."
And in the warm flame light, he lifted his hand and cupped Laurent's cheek, and then leaned in, and kissed him on the lips, gently.

He looked at Laurent, and he understood now what he had not understood then: that Laurent had known who he was that night. Laurent had known who he was and had still protected him, out of a sense of fairness that had somehow survived what had happened to him.

"There's a lot of blood," said Laurent.
"Luckily," said Damen, "I brought a physician."

Laurent said, "Our men have the gates and the halls. Ios is yours."
"And you," said Damen. "With your uncle gone, there won't be resistance. You have Vere."
Laurent was very still, and the moment seemed to draw out, the space between them private in the hushed baths.
"And the centre. We both hold the centre," said Laurent. And then: "It was one kingdom, once."
Laurent wasn't looking at him when he said it, and it was a long moment before he lifted his eyes to Damen's waiting ones, and Damen's breath caught at what he saw there, the odd shyness of it, as though Laurent was asking instead of answering.
"Yes," said Damen, feeling light-headed at the question.
And then he really did feel light-headed, because Laurent's face was so transformed by the new light in his eyes that Damen almost didn't recognize him, the expression full of joy.

Content Warnings

cindythenerd's review against another edition

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medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

Best out of the three. It’s not horrible like the first but isn’t the best. I hated how everything is brushed off of the previous books. I was only invested in the side characters.

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mirandyli's review against another edition

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adventurous dark tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.25

This series was ok. Before you read it take note of all the content warnings. Content warning: everything. I like the world building but the relationships are super toxic.

Damen and Laurent's relationship is especially yikes. They both lie to each other constantly for their own gain. Because Damen killed Laurent's brother a few years ago, Laurent orders Damen to be whipped 50 times in the first book and is miffed that he didn't die from it. Yet SOMEHOW... they still fall in love after that??? Because Damen is obsessed with pale skin and blonde hair (excuse me while I go vomit).

The series basically ends with Laurent killing Damen's brother and saying, "We've killed each other's brothers so we're even now. I no longer hate you and we can rule peacefully. Kiss kiss." Excuse me sirs, go to therapy.

And now that Damen has been a slave, he's now going to advocate for the end of slavery, despite being in support of it before? That's just a whole bag of yikes.

There were also a bunch of predictable moments (like that Laurent knew Damen's identity the whole time, Laurent was raped by his uncle and Jokaste would claim that her baby was Damen's).

Still a fast-paced decent read and I was able to finish the series in a week. I haven't read a fantasy book in a while and this series was a pretty good start to getting back into the fantasy genre.

Content Warnings

aeori's review against another edition

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slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? N/A
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

1.0

Content Warnings

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Reviews tagging 'Adult/minor relationship'

Kings Rising by C.S. Pacat

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