Reviews with content warning for Suicide - Heaven

This book genuinely changed parts of how I view my life. Its so real and raw and the author isnt afraid to make violent scenes vivid. Everything about this book from the structure to the way it presents itself is amazing. At first look, you'll think its a "them vs. us" story where theres a clear black and white villain and hero. Mieko shows that bullying is much more complicated than that, and by showing that even our main characters aren't all that likeable, the idea of it being a "good vs. bad" book gets thrown out the window. Each character has their own belief system, and life outside of the book. The unfinished ending adds to its rawness as it leaves us with more questions than answers, but thats just it – we will never truly get the full story of someones life. We merely looked into our nameless main character's life and stepped out of it. Will the bullying continue? How is he?, we will never know however we do know that life for these characters will continue on despite everything. There is no closure.

Content Warnings

asurasantosha's review against another edition

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adventurous challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

This book is fantastic but really not for the faint of heart. Please check out the content warnings before reading.

Content Warnings

sweetsxrrxw's review against another edition

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dark emotional reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

this was both my first kieko kawakmi book and the first book i've read after a very long slump. to avoid falling back into a slump, i kinda overstimulated myself and i decided to read the english edition (while listening to the audiobook) and also the spanish one. and yeah i feel like this hyperstimulation made me understand the book better

although i noticed a couple differences between the editions which me feel like ??? the most jarring one was by the end of the book: while in the spanish edition the narrator has seen his biological mother and, therefore, knows she had a lazy eye too, in the english edition he doesn't. and i thought that's such a small but important detail because it can build or destroy a solid reason to explain his choices.

anyway, have i enjoyed reading this? pretty much! would i reccomend the book? hmmm, it depends; not to everyone, that's for sure. and, of course, check the trigger warnings, because most of them are pretty graphic.

i believe on the main points of the story was to show us a somewhat flat character surrounded by differing opinions on what to do or how to cope with his situation and which one was better to settle for. personally, i like reading stories about characters facing hardships and their choping mechanisms to deal with them and i don't dislike stories that talk about bullying. and i really enjoyed the premise of two hurt people bonding over fear. their friendship was beautiful and, even though it didn't suffer huge changes, it was nice to see how it evolved with time and how they found a safe space in each other's company.

it's a shame that by the end of the book they never got to meet again

but definitely my favorite part was the second half of the book.

i just felt so many emotions while reading it. the volleyball bullying scene was totally the most devastating one in the book and i felt a knot in my stomach while reading it (i even had to take a little pause before i kept reading). however that same gut-wrenching scene led to many outstanding scenes such as the portrayal of the kids' philosophies. while i did not specially agree with their ways, i understood kojima and momose's opposed ideals. i mean, they both made good points at some part of their monologues.
oh and i think one of my favorite relationships in the book was the one the narrator had with his stepmom. at first she seemed like a distant person but by the end of the book both mother and son could find some kind of comfort in each other. and trust me, i was so so happy when he finally told her about the bullying and she made him change schools and later also supported him in the surgery process.

as for the last scene, it was a perfect bittersweet ending to the story.

once again i felt so happy that the main character was healed and saw the beauty of some parts of the city he used to hate so much. but at the same time it was heartbreaking to realize he didn't have anyone to share that beauty with :(

i feel like this could have been a 4 star read if it wasn't for a couple reasons:

the two scenes where we get a fairly detailed description of the narrator, a 14 year old, masturbating.
like yeah i understand how he does it only to calm down when he is feeling super tense and distressed
but they could have totally been black out scenes.
i know i said the philosophy of some characters was interesting (and so is the polarity between them) but.. they're 14. i think at that age one might be able to think of some of those points, but it would have felt more truthful if they were, at least, two years older.

but yeah, overall, i think it's a worthy read!

Content Warnings

rivergrid's review against another edition

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dark emotional hopeful reflective sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

Content Warnings

leanne_who_reads's review against another edition

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dark emotional sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Trigger warning - This book centers around bullying and mentions suicide and suicidal ideation. One particular chapter in this book is quite hard to get through and you'll have to consider if you feeling mentally able to digest this book or choose to read something else.

The characters in this book are well developed and the writing style is easy to digest. I felt triggered by Momose when the protagonist confronts him outside the hospital because he has zero empathy for the protagonist and Kojima in that scene, even so, it added to the story and made it more nuanced. At the same time, I can see how Momose could think that way.

You learn to feel so much empathy towards the protagonist as the story progresses and I quite enjoyed the ending because the protagonist got to experience some joy and beauty in the world after everything he had gone through.

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