Reviews tagging 'Gore'

Byłam Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh

25 reviews

bugcollector's review against another edition

challenging dark tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

0.75

At last, I'm done with this book, and it only took me 12 months! 

Eileen starts off funny and cunning. A bit suicidal, but mainly stuck in her place craving an escape:
▫️ "Icicles hung from the rafter over the front door, and I stood there imagining them cracking and darting through my breasts, slicing through the thick gristle of my shoulder like bullets or cleaving my brain into pieces."   (p. 3)
▫️ "If my daydreams from back then cane true, one day I'd have found him splayed out at the bottom of the stairs, neck broken but still breathing. 'It's about time', I'd say with the most bored affect I could master, peering over his dying body." (p. 5)
▫️ "He was a cruel character. Imagining his parents beating him as a child is the only path to forgiveness that I have found so far. It isn't perfect but it does the trick." (p. 6)
▫️ "I could be very dramatic with my self assessments." (p. 8)
▫️ "I imagined what relief I might feel if I could lie on Dr. Frye's couch just once and confess like some sort of fallen hero that my life was simply intolerable. But, in fact it was tolerable. I'd been tolerating it after all." (p. 22) 

As I read on (until about p. 50) Nothing made me want to pick this book again for a long while. I Ended up reading Moshfegh's newest book from this year, Lapnovka, and regretted it dearly, which put me off from this one even more. Determined to cut down my currently reading list before the new year, I found myself working hard to read through it this weekend. 

My problem with Eileen is that she stays stuck in the place for most of the book. Near the very end something interesting happens, but by then you have fallen asleep.
Her routine isn't unique, and there's so much you can read about her hating everything, her repeating that she's a new girl now and those things happened in the past, her saying it's the last time she went to the prison, the last time she saw her father, the last time she saw an icicle drop, yada yada yada.
Eileen ends being relatable relatively fast. She is deeply disterbing, pretty vile, and endulged with some hard topics (Moshpeg loves bringing poop and masterbation to the conversation)

I think the plot sounds promising, centering a young girl seeking an escape. 
But you won't get an escape with it, you'd end up wanting to escape from it. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Body shaming, Child abuse, Cursing, Death, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Gun violence, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Torture, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Kidnapping, Grief, Death of parent, Murder, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment

ameliasbooks's review against another edition

dark mysterious tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

The story had huge potential, but made me feel uncomfortable, unfortunately for the wrong reasons most of the time.
Telling the story retrospectivly was a weird decision and made the book less suspenseful. It also could have been definitely shorter, which was mainly caused by the author underestimating the reader and over explaining every single characteristic or situation important for the story. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Body shaming, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Gore, Forced institutionalization, and Alcohol

Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexism, Sexual violence, Violence, Vomit, Religious bigotry, and Death of parent

ardour's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

i legit felt reborn as the novel ended

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Child abuse, Death, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Incest, Mental illness, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Forced institutionalization, Excrement, Vomit, Police brutality, Death of parent, Murder, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Alcohol, Sexual harassment, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Body horror, Confinement, Gore, Gun violence, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Terminal illness, Violence, Xenophobia, Antisemitism, Grief, Stalking, Lesbophobia, and Sexual harassment

Minor: Animal death and Blood

Extra content warning for the existential dread that’s portrayed for the most part of the novel (I’m thinking of others with existential OCD like me)—HOWEVER important to note that everything changes for Eileen at a certain point in the book and she undergoes a paradigm shift where one (seemingly insignificant thing) makes her realise that her life can have meaning. I found it SUPER cathartic in this way so I’m glad I kept going even though up until then her existential angst was hard to read. ~~~ Why there’s so many TWs - read to get a more accurate perspective on whether it’s the kind of book for you (spoiler free): This book is written from the perspective of Eileen writing about her young adulthood—as an elderly person. A lot of her dark thoughts & xenophobia come from the time when she grew up and the lack of love/care she received as a child. In this way I found it somewhat easier to suspend my reaction to some of the awful things she said. Additionally, Eileen, at the age she is writing the story, wants to portray what kind of person she was back then—warts and all—without trying to distract from what she feels are negative & toxic traits by inspiring sympathy. In this way it’s aggressively honest and Eileen doesn’t want to shield her past self from the judgement she feels she deserves.

nabila99's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional mysterious reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Body shaming, Child abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Mental illness, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Death of parent, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis

Moderate: Bullying, Chronic illness, Death, Gore, Incest, Rape, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Violence, Blood, Excrement, Vomit, Grief, Stalking, Murder, and Sexual harassment

Minor: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Confinement, Drug use, Racism, Toxic relationship, Police brutality, Abortion, and Classism

readingwithrickwood's review against another edition

dark slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Child abuse, Death, Fatphobia, Gore, Gun violence, Incest, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Blood, Kidnapping, Grief, Death of parent, Toxic friendship, and Alcohol

hannahlouise_'s review against another edition

dark mysterious sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

not my favourite moshfegh book but a dark, intense read and i was genuinely surprised at points. definitely preferred to death in her hands but nowhere near myorar at least to me 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Animal death, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Confinement, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Gun violence, Incest, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Terminal illness, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Excrement, Police brutality, Kidnapping, Grief, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Fire/Fire injury, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Alcohol, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Abortion

lcyarnall1's review against another edition

challenging dark funny tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Eating disorder, Fatphobia, Gore, Incest, Pedophilia, Sexual content, Excrement, and Kidnapping

bookishgoob's review against another edition

dark tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? N/A
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

An older Eileen details her last few days in her home town as a 24 year old. 

Sometimes disgusting and outrightly human, Eileen delved deep into the mind of a woman of the 1960’s. It makes you think “can I admit these things about myself when i’m alone?” The way that Eileen willingly admits that she has an obsession with bowel movements, the way that she looks at the teenage boys in the prison while maintaining that she isn’t a pedophile, and her unhealthy obsession with Randy is something so wrong that it is actually right. It’s these deep thoughts that some people have that they will never ever admit. the way she fantasizes about dying, and even killing her father may make you think she is actively insane; but are these not things we think about often? Thinking of how the people around us would react if we disappeared. How we would feel if our parents who abused us just one day dropped dead? I don’t necessarily think Eileen is “unhinged”, we as a culture just don’t view “femininity” to be anything more or less than dainty, submissive, cutesy, quiet, and agreeable. Eileen is none of those things and because of that, the mind automatically jumps to her being unhinged. I feel like this story really encapsulated the human experience and the human brain when we’re left alone. completely. It explores the idea “are these feelings platonic or romantic” when it comes to your first same sex crush. I’m not sure if she really knew or ever figured it out, but it’s something i myself and many other people have gone through. Feeling as though we’d do anything for this person to like us a little bit more, trust us, need us, WANT us. It’s an ostracizing feeling. The way that Eileen was so easily manipulated by Rachel set off alarm bells in my brain. Eileen is so perfectly an adultified person. Someone who was a victim of emotional incest in her youth. forced to be her parents caretakers when she was still learning how to care for herself. The fact that she is so “vulgar” and “disgusting” is so scarily the way an adult who was a victim of adultification would act. 

The plot twist was so mind boggling. I thought for sure I had figured out what the plot twist was going to be, but i didn’t and that was exciting. Eileen was such a complicated and real person. An unreliable narrator at its best. I don’t think i’ll ever revisit this book, though. It left me feeling the way requiem for a dream (2000) did. It was off putting, nausea inducing, and downright uncomfortable. The fat shaming/fat phobia really sucked to read, but it was also very telling of Eileen’s no filter personality. The way that she looked at others is no doubt how her parents saw others and forced her to have that same rhetoric as they forced her to care for them. It’s seen especially in the way that Eileen talks about herself, and how near the end she talks about her mom buying her clothes a size too small so she would try and fit normal into those clothes. This book details so greatly the effect that adultification abuse has on children as they turn into adults. The inability to form long lasting, healthy, and real relationships. The inability to decipher right from wrong. The way that they see the world. It’s scary how well it was depicted. Eileen was a really great read. Slow at first, it doesn’t truly pick up until the last chapter “Christmas Eve” but, the foreshadowing is so incredibly important that even though it was slow paced, it had a reason to be slow paced. The pacing wasn’t an issue like it is in other slow paced books. I really enjoyed this read, but I feel like i have to go cleanse my brain to feel normal again. 

Triggers: Child Abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, pedophilic thoughts, confinement, fat phobia, death, death of a parent, vomit, feces, incest, murder, suicidal thoughts, homicidal thoughts, miscarriage, toxic friendship, toxic family, abuse, alcoholism, drug use, graphic descriptions of bodily functions (bowel movements, sweat, masturbation, menstruation, not washing hands after the bathroom, etc) 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Child abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Violence, and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Animal death, Body horror, Confinement, Eating disorder, Fatphobia, Gore, Gun violence, Homophobia, Incest, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Racial slurs, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Excrement, Vomit, Kidnapping, Grief, Death of parent, Murder, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

raelong12's review against another edition

dark mysterious sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Eating disorder, Gore, Misogyny, Rape, Self harm, Violence, Vomit, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Body horror, Body shaming, Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Physical abuse, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Death of parent, Murder, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis

jillybooks's review against another edition

dark mysterious tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

It took me a while to fully enjoy this book. The pacing was slow at the beginning and I wish there was a bit more to the ending. Otherwise I loved the writing (as to be expected) and was completely absorbed by the latter half of the story. I definitely liked My Year of Rest and Relaxation better, just because it felt more fleshy. Still, a great read.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Gore, Gun violence, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexual violence, and Violence