Reviews tagging 'Panic attacks/disorders'

Glitterland by Alexis Hall

61 reviews

granny_rae's review against another edition

dark emotional funny hopeful inspiring sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, and Suicide attempt

amaldae's review against another edition

emotional hopeful medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

I read this despite having taken it off my TBR years ago, because I happened to want a romance with depression rep. This came highly recommend.

And I... liked it more than I thought I would, but ultimately not as much as I might have. Ash is rude and immature and avoids introspection, which makes him an occasionally-frustrating main character. For the most part, I enjoyed the dynamic between him and Darian in that both of them did make me laugh. However, Ash consistently treats Darian poorly, which keeps the relationship fairly shallow.

I dislike it when the plot mainly progresses through things happening to the central couple instead of developing naturally between them. I felt like the two crucial plot points being driven by the actions of side characters kept Ash from growing. (The scene where his mental illness gets outed was properly upsetting. What an awful idea that people, let alone someone calling themselves your friend, sees you that way, gives you that little agency.) And so, when at the end they finally do decide to become an item, I didn't quite believe him even though he said all the right things. There was just a lot of character development I'd rather have seen on-page. A lot of hard moments that we all know are in the horizon, but that we never see the couple tackle together.

Those missing scenes were kind of why I read the book in the first place. I wanted to see someone actually living with their mental illness and fill their life with meaning again. What I got was yet another glittering tale of falling in love, but I wanted it to be so much more. It seemed to really get its characters and had all the ingredients to be more.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, and Outing

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts and Toxic friendship

Minor: Biphobia, Drug use, Self harm, Forced institutionalization, Suicide attempt, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , and Alcohol

catsteaandabook's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful

• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness and Panic attacks/disorders

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts and Suicide attempt

Minor: Biphobia, Fatphobia, and Homophobia

jdasilva's review against another edition

challenging emotional funny hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness

Moderate: Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Suicide attempt, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis

Minor: Cursing, Fatphobia, Homophobia, and Alcohol

adrianas65's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny lighthearted sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Forced institutionalization, Suicide attempt, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Addiction, Biphobia, Alcohol, and Classism

jei_reads_sometimes's review against another edition

emotional hopeful lighthearted medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, and Toxic friendship

booksthatburn's review against another edition

emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Ash Winters is frequently a mess and thinks he's unlovable. With BPD driving a mix of depression and anxiety, he's given up on actually feeling emotions and being interested in anyone longer than a one-night stand. Some guy from Essex was supposed to be such a one-night stand, it wasn't supposed to matter that he has a name (Darian), or that he is annoyingly upbeat, or that he's from Essex, because it was supposed to be over. But it's not. Ash runs into Darian again and wants that spark of some emotion again, because he's pretty sure it was a good emotion.

Ash and Darian genuinely work well together, I love how their relationship develops. Ash is just as much of an asshole by the end of the book as the start, but he's more sure of himself and more willing to take risks for Darian than it seems like he was for his other friends. Due to his high anxiety, "taking risks" includes, in this case, going to the store, spending the night in the same bed, and being emotionally vulnerable. Neither of them are people it's necessarily easy to be around (Ash moreso than Darian), and that shows up in many different ways.

The ending caught me off guard, especially the incident which precedes it. I was pleasantly surprised by how things end up, but the story lingers in an uncomfortable situation for far longer than I can normally handle reading. Part of what helped is the way the narrative had handled anxiety and tension up until that point, I had built up enough trust in the author that I was able to wait for how things shook out.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, Toxic friendship, and Classism

Moderate: Biphobia, Drug use, Fatphobia, Infidelity, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Forced institutionalization, Grief, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Death, Suicide, Medical content, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, and Death of parent

elliott_the_clementine's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful reflective sad tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

As always, I feel incredibly seen. Alexis Hall has a talent for writing books that excellently represent mental illness but are still bearable to read for folks (like me) who struggle with similar issues as his characters. I do not have the words to fully express how much I adored Glitterland - so much so that I devoured it in an evening. Stunning, as all of Hall’s books are. 

Also, Darian is an angel. A seriously awesome guy. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Medical trauma, and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Ableism, Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Suicide attempt, and Alcohol

Minor: Abandonment

sonygaystation's review against another edition

dark emotional funny reflective sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, and Suicidal thoughts

Moderate: Suicide, Grief, Suicide attempt, and Toxic friendship

Minor: Biphobia, Drug use, Homophobia, Infidelity, Forced institutionalization, Gaslighting, and Alcohol

galleytrot's review against another edition

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

FIRST READ: Sep 2022

SECOND READ: Feb 2024 

FORMAT: Digital, Audio

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE: 3.75 / 5⭐ 

TECHNICAL / PRODUCTION: 4 / 5⭐ 

FINAL – OVERALL: 3.75 / 5⭐ 

In this book, Ash’s history with mania, depression, and anxiety leave him questioning every choice he makes and any right he has to health or happiness – to say nothing of his inability to provide someone else with such things. When a fabulous, glam’d up, spray-tanned, glorious mess of a man enthusiastically inserts himself into Ash’s life, he is happy to take a night of fun so long as they can forget each other in the morning. Darian isn’t quite as keen on letting go of a beautiful thing though, and while he represents everything Ash should stay far away from, maybe it’d be okay to have some fun and live a little wild before it all has to come crashing down. 

Writing that summary paragraph was an exercise in frustration because reducing the massive breadth of emotional complexity within these pages to a handful of sentences is unfairly reductive. The crushing mountain of insecurity that comes from years of shaky mental health mixed with terrible self esteem and a broken system of support (one which might bring you down just as often as build you up or advocate for you) makes it a Sisyphean struggle to escape from under. This is something I connect with all too strongly. Darian does an excellent job at pushing Ash to do better and make the difficult choices while never babying him, whereas Nash treats Ash with embittered frustration and Max juts waits and hopes Ash will come to him in time. 

It's been nearly a year and a half since my first read-through of this book, and I was compelled to revisit it after seeing a number of the Spires books getting facelifts and re-releases. I wasn’t sure if the stories themselves would be reworked, but as far as I could recall, there were no significant changes. The two major additions to the book come as bonus content: a short story detailing Nile’s encounter with Max on the night of the stag, plus a peek into what Ash’s pulp fiction crime novel might look like. The former left me agitated and with an even less flattering view of Nile’s character, and the latter was a beautifully over-the-top trainwreck of cliches and grit that had me snickering. 

This book has representation for gays and bisexuals. It features a character who struggles with bipolar depression. Beyond that, there is little else in the way of diversity. 

The following elaborates on my content warnings. These may be interpreted as spoilers, but I do not go into deep detail.

This book contains:

alcohol use; implication of infidelity; biphobia; mentions of past self-harm; past suicide attempt; mental illness (bipolar depression); mentions of drug use (ecstasy); bipolar lows, episodes of deep depression; suicidal thoughts; mention of past successful suicide; eating disorder used as the punchline of a joke; classism; panic attacks, anxiety; past toxic relationship (you cannot love the bipolar out of someone, y’all); fatphobia; and, past child abandonment.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Panic attacks/disorders and Sexual content

Moderate: Biphobia, Cursing, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, Grief, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, and Classism

Minor: Death, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Infidelity, Self harm, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Suicide attempt, Abandonment, and Injury/Injury detail