Reviews with content warning for Alcohol - Yes, Daddy

This book was extremely depressing. Jonah simply wanted to have a roof over his hand, and what happened to him was truly awful to read.

Parks-Ramage managed to write realistic characters who go through SO much trauma, with a bittersweet ending that left me feeling… complicated.

My only critique would be that the book felt so depressing and hopeless that at times it was very hard to return to the story.

Other than that, the book is a grim cautionary tale about abusive relationships and sexual assault. It was very emotional and well written. I hope that Jonah is able to live happily after the books ends. That is all.

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ekeiser8's review against another edition

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dark emotional reflective sad tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.5

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freddybingsu's review against another edition

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dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

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mangofandango's review against another edition

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dark tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Loveable characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? N/A

3.0

I have mixed feelings about this one! I signed up for one thing and got sort of another, and I think that was intentional but it was less fun than I imagined it would be. Like, I expected dark, sexy gay thriller, and what it actually is is...dark, grim, sort of mysterious but not quite a thriller, not so much consensually sexy sex but definitely full of many rape scenes, with a main character that seems more like a symbol than an actual character somehow.

I read the discussion guide in the back because I found I finished the book somewhat unclear as to the author's intentions here. Like, it's a story about an ex-evangelical who was forced into conversion therapy, it's got lots of "you deserve this sexual assault, rape and abuse because you're gay" stuff going on because of that, it's trauma after trauma, and the specter of evangelicalism doesn't ever really leave - it gets a kinder re-brand toward the end. So I honestly couldn't tell if this book was operating on stereotypes, playing into some of the poison it represents, or intended to be an exploration of the ways spiritual, sexual, and emotional abuse plays out in these contexts. The author says he was trying to diversify the idea behind #MeToo and bring gay voices and an imperfect victim into it, so it's more the latter, but I didn't find that it was a very strong statement of anything because I couldn't quite tell which side he was on sometimes? Though now that I think about it, it is in some ways a sort of systematic way of telling the story of how someone might fall into an abusive situation, be traumatized, and find potential for healing afterwards.

Overall, I did like the book well enough and feel invested in the story. But I didn't love it. And if...any triggers around spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, rape, false reporting, relationship abuse, isolation etc etc. are an issue for you, I think you should steer clear of this one.

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dalmavatai's review against another edition

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Ah I usually don't dnf books this far into them but I'm just really not feeling this one. The idea behind the story is really solid: exploring the power dynamics between wealthy, successful, older gay men and young, aspiring, broke gay men and the exploitation and abuse that can happen within those relationships.

However, I think this book is just poorly executed. The characters and the relationships are not developed well enough for me to believe in them, and the dynamics of an abusive relationship are equally poorly written. It feels like the author read a blog post about Abuse 101 and clumsily inserted every point at random intervals throughout the story. Like, all the dynamics - Jonah gaslighting himself and his experience of abuse, Richard compensating with meaningless shopping sprees after something bad happens - feel disingenuous, insincere; I just wasn't convinced by the author that these characters and relationships are real. They feel very one-dimensional, pawns to illustrate the author's point but lacking in development and depth.

This is really my main issue with the story but I also wanted to mention that of course it's really important to shed light on how old men can coerce younger men into playing out their BDSM fantasies - but BDSM is not inherently abusive. I think Jonah's daddy issues stemming from his homophobic father and wanting to please both him and God in his deeply Christian family is really interesting and will no doubt resonate with a lot of people's experience, but I think it's important to note that wanting to be dominated in sex is not inherently 'pathological', and even if it stems from mommy/daddy issues, it's still a valid sexual preference and people can engage in BDSM and have it be a healthy dynamic (that doesn't mean that we can't or shouldn't interrogate cultural trends around daddy issues, but it does mean that we shouldn't pathologize individuals with these sexual preferences because that doesn't help anyone).

Also, if you still want to read this book, please please look into trigger warnings, this book covers very heavy subjects and all the things I listed under 'graphic' content warnings are indeed EXTREMELY graphic.

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foxmulders's review against another edition

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challenging dark tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

2.75

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shereadytoread's review against another edition

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dark tense fast-paced

1.5

Where this book really failed me was the classification as a "thriller" and in some places I've seen it categorized as "an erotic thriller". This book is a very specific delve into conversion therapy, sexual explotation of poor gay men, and conflicting religious beliefs.

First trigger warnings: this book is FILLED and very frequent sexual assault, rape, and sexual abuse. I would estimate there was 1.5/10+ sexual scenes that were openly consensual. It is the premise of almost the entire story. There is also exploration of conversion therapy, homophobic families/churches and financial abuse.

Those trigger warnings are why this story being marketed as a "thriller" is completely wrong to me. This book very explicitly explores how a man uses financial abuse to entrap a man that has already been sexually abused in the past. Nothing about this is "thrilling". There are no plot twists. It is a straightforward horrific story. There was nothing I didn't expect and spent time trying to figure out, other than how this terrible abuse would be resolved. I'm not sure how any of this is "thrilling". It is compelling, gritty, and it is fast-paced. I read it in one sitting (partially because if I put it down, I doubt I would have picked it up again). It makes callbacks to #MeToo in some ways I won't really explain because they are spoilers, but I think it missed the mark.

Disclaimer: I received a free finished copy from the publisher.

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bluehairedlibrarian's review against another edition

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dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.5

I'm still not sure how to feel about this book. It wasn't what I was expecting, and the foundation of the entire story is queer trauma. At times I felt like it leaned on negative tropes used to condemn gay men in the not-so-distant past, but at the same time, queer authors should be able to write about anything. In this book, the author explores the types of horrors that can come from a relationship that not only has a large age gap between partners, but also a large gap in authority and power.

With that said, this book is dark and traumatic, but the writing quality kept me reading despite the horrors on the page. Jonah is a compelling narrator and I sympathized with him while also thinking he was a complete idiot at times. The situations he got himself into could be excused by his naivete and Midwestern religious upbringing, but at the same time, he was incredibly naïve. He's also a very unreliable narrator, but I liked the framework that is revealed later on in the book. I thought it a bit strange for it suddenly to revolve around his non-relationship with a side character, and the ending felt strange and little forced.

I can't say I enjoyed this book, but I don't regret finishing it either. It's difficult and does not fall under the Gothic Horror trope at all. It's a difficult read, but a mostly well-written one.

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