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jrc2011's review against another edition
3.0
The title of this book is entirely deceptive: I was expecting more information about the benefits or advantages. The early chapters describe the historical rise of solo living in parallel with the industrial age and the entry of women into the workforce. The information about the availability of housing for single dwellers was interesting -- from hotels to apartments to SROs and smaller houses.
Ultimately, this book essentially an overly long attempt to validate data in a study with anecdotal interviews claimed as "qualitative" research. The author keeps throwing in things about our obsession with the "cult of individuality." He routinely describes the benefits but then tears down the same. The overall tone of the book is rather like a series of blog posts or lifestyle magazine articles that seem to draw from the same handful of studies. The repeated use of description of the interview subjects doesn't increase the credibility -- just seems pseudo-journalistic.
Ultimately, this book essentially an overly long attempt to validate data in a study with anecdotal interviews claimed as "qualitative" research. The author keeps throwing in things about our obsession with the "cult of individuality." He routinely describes the benefits but then tears down the same. The overall tone of the book is rather like a series of blog posts or lifestyle magazine articles that seem to draw from the same handful of studies. The repeated use of description of the interview subjects doesn't increase the credibility -- just seems pseudo-journalistic.
teaandlibri's review against another edition
3.0
An interesting book about people who live alone by choice or not and why. They range from the elderly to young people. It was an interesting look at a rising phenomenon and has been on my to-read list for a while.
The author can occasionally get repetitive and doesn't do much to dress up the stats and drier parts of the book. But it was compelling to read why people choose to live alone--in terms of keeping drama out of their lives, enjoying space, not wanting to be tied down, forced to via divorce/children moving out/death of a spouse, etc. On occasion the book can get quite sad: some people who choose to live alone and apparently have no close ties, either by family or friends or their community. One of the most interesting aspects for me was reading about the death of one woman who lived alone and had no close family. An investigator is assigned to figure out who is the closest living relative to deal with the deceased's estate.
It also can hit nerves in some places: some people are bitter over divorces, don't want to marry so as not to care for an aging spouse, they had a long-term relationship that ended badly. Or by the changes of their city around them, their friends die off or move away, and the children who once grew up there move on and out.
Yet a lot of people seem to relish living alone, despite the possible negatives. The ability to come and go and to have one's own space without having to answer to anyone. Being alone forced some in the book to go out and interact with the community, strengthening their ties. Others "found" themselves when they didn't have to be in a relationship or deal with other people.
I'd say the book seems to focus more on the dark side of living alone, despite discussing the appeal of it on the cover. Maybe it just stuck with me more. Overall I'd say it's worth a read if you have any interest in this at all.
The author can occasionally get repetitive and doesn't do much to dress up the stats and drier parts of the book. But it was compelling to read why people choose to live alone--in terms of keeping drama out of their lives, enjoying space, not wanting to be tied down, forced to via divorce/children moving out/death of a spouse, etc. On occasion the book can get quite sad: some people who choose to live alone and apparently have no close ties, either by family or friends or their community. One of the most interesting aspects for me was reading about the death of one woman who lived alone and had no close family. An investigator is assigned to figure out who is the closest living relative to deal with the deceased's estate.
It also can hit nerves in some places: some people are bitter over divorces, don't want to marry so as not to care for an aging spouse, they had a long-term relationship that ended badly. Or by the changes of their city around them, their friends die off or move away, and the children who once grew up there move on and out.
Yet a lot of people seem to relish living alone, despite the possible negatives. The ability to come and go and to have one's own space without having to answer to anyone. Being alone forced some in the book to go out and interact with the community, strengthening their ties. Others "found" themselves when they didn't have to be in a relationship or deal with other people.
I'd say the book seems to focus more on the dark side of living alone, despite discussing the appeal of it on the cover. Maybe it just stuck with me more. Overall I'd say it's worth a read if you have any interest in this at all.
ashlleya's review against another edition
3.0
Very neutral analysis of the demographic shift the world is experiencing
Uplifting to know I am not alone in my desire to be alone
Uplifting to know I am not alone in my desire to be alone
tamarahala's review against another edition
4.0
I thought this book would make me feel good about my Solo life but somehow it made me feel more depressed?
shibosan's review against another edition
3.0
Не ждал многого от этой книги, казалось - ну о чем тут писать можно? И поначалу так и было - занимательные, но не более, статистика и исторические экскурсы. Но автор довольно интересно рассказывает о том, как различна жизнь одиночек разных возрастов, полов, национальностей и социального положения. О тех, кто выбрал одинокую жизнь сам и о тех, кто живет так вынужденно. Кто пришел к жизни соло, и кто уходит, устав о нее. О проблемах, с которыми сталкиваются одиночки и даже о дискриминации одиноких, как бы чуднО это не звучало.Дочитывал книгу с большим интересом, заставило задуматься о будущем. :)
lohanesian's review against another edition
4.0
I picked this book up because I chose to live alone a few years ago but am now at the point where I don’t want to be alone for various reasons, and wanted to read more about other people’s thinking on the matter. The author makes a convincing argument that this the trend of people living alone is here to stay, but wisely avoids making any value judgments about this trend. Certainly the people who make this choice at earlier stages in their lives report more advantages than disadvantages, but the people who make this choice at the end of their lives seem to be in a rather precarious state due to failing health, despite their desire to maintain their dignity by living independently. To the extent that this author has an agenda it is that the various social ills associated with the rise of people living alone (poverty, isolation in old age) are not a result of living alone per se but the result of an inadequate social safety net. If I do choose to be married, I am statistically likely to outlive my husband. Ending up alone as I age is therefore not necessarily a matter of choice, but an inevitability. And possibly one that our society should provide for.
hreed7's review against another edition
3.0
I was drawn to this (audio)book because I thought modern romance, which aziz ansari did with eric klinenberg was terrific, and moreover I personally live alone and I figured that this would resonate with me.
Sadly nothing out of this book made me get up from my chair with excitement. Most of the book was simply a long, qualitative recapitulation of things I expected: younger people are more connected by social media and such than ever, and they have more money. Meanwhile adults are divorcing and old people don't want to live with their kids anymore. If you want to hear stories of people with lived experiences like these you'll enjoy this book.
the parts of the book that may in fact stick with me longer are these:
1. there was a brief sketch of the Swedish tradition of moving out of the house and into an apartment of one's own, which I found to be a fascinating contrast to the (typical) American experience of moving in with others after college. Apparently it was a big swedish social democratic policy initiative to create lots of singleton housing and it has created a collectivized cultural experience that I found fascinating.
2. the role that urban development plays in encouraging--or more accurately, reacting to--the rise of singleton living, and I thought it was so interesting that even as there is a greater need for housing for singletons, they do not present as cohesive a voting bloc as families so their needs are not reflected in policy choices. I couldn't help but think of a 99% invisible episode called "the sunshine hotel" about a single room occupancy hotel in the bowery that was home to men with all kinds of situations, and then it was demolished like so many other places that provide essential housing functions.
So, some interesting tidbits, but generally not one for the record books.
Sadly nothing out of this book made me get up from my chair with excitement. Most of the book was simply a long, qualitative recapitulation of things I expected: younger people are more connected by social media and such than ever, and they have more money. Meanwhile adults are divorcing and old people don't want to live with their kids anymore. If you want to hear stories of people with lived experiences like these you'll enjoy this book.
the parts of the book that may in fact stick with me longer are these:
1. there was a brief sketch of the Swedish tradition of moving out of the house and into an apartment of one's own, which I found to be a fascinating contrast to the (typical) American experience of moving in with others after college. Apparently it was a big swedish social democratic policy initiative to create lots of singleton housing and it has created a collectivized cultural experience that I found fascinating.
2. the role that urban development plays in encouraging--or more accurately, reacting to--the rise of singleton living, and I thought it was so interesting that even as there is a greater need for housing for singletons, they do not present as cohesive a voting bloc as families so their needs are not reflected in policy choices. I couldn't help but think of a 99% invisible episode called "the sunshine hotel" about a single room occupancy hotel in the bowery that was home to men with all kinds of situations, and then it was demolished like so many other places that provide essential housing functions.
So, some interesting tidbits, but generally not one for the record books.
marisacarpico's review against another edition
informative
medium-paced
3.25
Decent if probably a bit out of date. Still, not as irrelevant as I feared considering how long ago it came out. Think I bought the hard copy when I was thinking about living alone or had just started to. POssibly I've had it even longer than that, though. Regardless, raised my own existential dread a bit while also reaffirming the need for more institutionalized support for "singletons" to live sustainably.
atarbett's review against another edition
3.0
Best stop after Chapter 5, because after that it goes from “Living Alone rocks!” to “You’re going to die alone and a cat will eat your face!”