Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Memorial by Bryan Washington

31 reviews

spookyaz's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Grief, Homophobia, Death, Domestic abuse, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Alcoholism, Cursing, Addiction, Cancer, Death of parent, and Emotional abuse

madisophi's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad fast-paced

• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

I get why some people would really like this book, but it simply was not my cup of tea. The characters were so bad for each other and themselves, that it was kind of baffling that they had survived for so long. However, the writing style was beautiful and was what kept me hooked throughout the book. Overall, I feel like this book tried to say something, but I don’t really know what. 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Abandonment, Alcohol, Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Grief, Death, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Terminal illness, and Toxic relationship

sakisreads's review against another edition

challenging emotional sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

I LOVED this book. There are definitely some content warnings required (which I’ll put down below), but overall I loved Memorial deeply.

The Japanese food made throughout the story was a real comfort to me ✨ I also adored how Benito and Mitsuko started to cook together as their relationship progressed 🥰

What really made me fall in love with this book though was probably everyone’s ‘humanness’. Everyone had their flaws, everyone sometimes skirted around their flaws, everyone felt their flaws, etc. It was an insight into everyday human life and how we could push away the people we love, whether intentional or not. I felt Benito try to numb his flaws through conversations about work and about Ximena, whereas I felt Mike try to numb his flaws through escapism (going to see Eiju or Tan). 

There was no ‘happy ending’ per se, but I was surprised at how okay I was with this. I really appreciated Benito and Mike’s okayness at the end, even with Omar and Tan in the picture 🥲

All in all, a fantastic book. I can’t wait to recommend it to more people 🏳️‍🌈

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Homophobia, Body shaming, Fatphobia, Medical content, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual content, and Toxic relationship

whatannikareads's review against another edition

emotional funny hopeful reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

this one started out not rough, but a little choppy for me, but from the end of Benson's first part until the end of the novel it really picked up for me. i found i needed time to adjust to the absence in detail from Benson's perspective, but in hindsight I can see it's how Benson process information as direct result of his upbringing/trauma. when the exposition picks up with Mike, i really started to enjoy the quiet unraveling of these individual character's and their family members' lives. it's not a pretty, squeaky clean relationship and it does get abusive at times. i'm not saying that that's a good thing to read about, but it does offer a nuanced perspective on a queer relationship. also, i love that the novel so authentically speaks to Washington's own upbringing; only he could have written this novel with the appreciation of the cultures involved and that intersection of houston and osaka. the characters have flaws and have raw reactions to the conflicts presented to them, which i think is why this novel was so enjoyable--because it's testament to the human experience. i think it'd be a great hbo max show.

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Cancer, Vomit, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Terminal illness, Death of parent, Domestic abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Toxic relationship, Homophobia, Medical content, and Abandonment

readingwithcoffee's review against another edition

emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

One hand I thought the fact this cast is basically entirely people of color (and at least all the characters of note are not white) and their problems don’t stem from racism was very refreshing. However the emotional repression and emotionally stunt aspects of the characters and just how miserable they are (though the writing is very good) both made the book very refreshing in some aspects while frustrating in others. 

Also one hand the two men the book is in the perspective of grew up in hostile environments and the main cast is their families so it could just be what they would find normalized but it was difficult to tell of the novel took domestic violence seriously especially violence involving throwing things? 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Domestic abuse, Cancer, Homophobia, Toxic relationship, Alcoholism, Terminal illness, Medical trauma, Infidelity, Grief, Death of parent, Racism, Physical abuse, Fatphobia, Death, Cursing, Racial slurs, Alcohol, Classism, Body shaming, and Abandonment

emmelinelc's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Grief, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Cancer, and Death of parent

Moderate: Alcoholism, Homophobia, Abandonment, Racism, and Sexual content

mansinnikam's review against another edition

dark funny medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

1.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Cultural appropriation, Alcoholism, Classism, Death of parent, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, and Toxic relationship

noraxkatharina's review against another edition

reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death of parent and Sexual content

Moderate: Racial slurs, Terminal illness, and Toxic relationship

readwithasherreid's review against another edition

emotional reflective slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

MEMORIAL is a book that has been on my radar for quite some time. When I found a copy of it at my local indie bookstore, I knew right away I had to have it. This is a book I can definitely see people not liking due to a lack of understanding of what exactly Bryan Washington was going for. However, this 100% worked for me!! At its core, this is a story about messy relationships. Yes, there is the discussion of messy romantic and sexual relationships, but that is not all this book is about. There are also messy family dynamics, specifically the conversations revolve around what it means to be a queer son of color and the way your relationship with your dad changes because of this. As a Puerto Rican queer trans man with my own messy familial dynamic, the conversations in this book were so deeply impactful that I spent a solid 30 minutes sobbing between chapters. I can understand why this didn’t work for everyone, but by god, I read this at the exact time I needed it and I will forever be grateful to Bryan Washington for such an incredible piece!! I need to get my hands on anything he has written and I hope that if you give this book a try, you can appreciate it just as much as I did. If we’re mutuals and you’ve read this, please feel free to message me about it!!

CWs that I can't link below: death from cancer, gentrification, being HIV+. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Domestic abuse, Alcoholism, Racism, Racial slurs, Drug use, Toxic relationship, Homophobia, Cancer, Grief, Fatphobia, Chronic illness, Death of parent, Sexual violence, and Sexual assault

Minor: Car accident and Transphobia

alonadadonut's review against another edition

dark emotional funny sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

This is a book about people who are really bad at expressing love. Like, *so* bad at it. I wanted to yell at the protagonists at least 20 times throughout the book. It was cruel and raw and deceptively dry and I couldn't look away. Loved Mitsuko, what an icon. Would recommend to anyone who likes it when books tears their heart out and stomps on it. 
Not 5 stars because the book ends on a sort of cliffhanger and I would prefer to know what ends up happening. On the one hand I understand why we don't get told what happens and on the other hand I desperately require closure.

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Abandonment, Alcoholism, Death of parent, Infidelity, Sexual content, and Toxic relationship

Minor: Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Medical content, and Racial slurs