sc104906's review against another edition
3.0
This book is a memoir of the author's life and provides insight into being an overweight woman. I appreciate her view, especially because it is one not often told. I found myself connecting to many of the issues regarding weight and the social issues surrounding it. It did get repetitive near the end of the book, but I appreciate the fact that this book exists.
ginnikin's review
I don't even know how to begin to respond to this. It was powerful and heart-wrenching and extremely intense. It was also very, very hard. It's definitely not for everyone. It's crammed full of hurt, but there's also some hope near the end. I'm amazed at Roxane Gay for putting this on paper and then putting it out -- and then reading the audiobook! I want to give her a huge hug, but she makes the point several times that she is not a hugger and likes being touched by only certain people, which I totally respect.
spaceodin's review against another edition
3.0
“When you’re overweight, your body becomes a matter of public record in many respects. Your body is constantly and prominently on display. People project assumed narratives onto your body and are not at all interested in the truth of your body, whatever that truth might be...Regardless of what you do, your body is the subject of public discourse with family, friends, and strangers alike...this commentary is often couched as concern, as people only having your best interests at heart. They forget that you are a person. You are your body, nothing more, and your body should damn well become less.”
cristalmh's review against another edition
4.0
I know hunger/body is a difficult topic to write about but I wanted more. The relationship with your body is a journey. I think she does a good job of explaining the limitations and the fears.
Makes me wonder if anyone is at peace with the state of their body.
Makes me wonder if anyone is at peace with the state of their body.
cscottrun's review against another edition
2.0
While I continue to enjoy Roxane Gay's style of writing, I found this book redundant and disappointing. I could relate to a lot of what she was saying. Many of her experiences are very human, common experiences, and some I cannot fathom. These experiences, however, were belabored to the point that the significance of each event was diminished. I would read a moment that resonated with me so strongly I was in tears, but when I would read that moment for the 100th time, it felt insincere. I felt like I read the same sentence over and over in multiple paragraphs in multiple chapters. This memoir could have been three or four personal essays.
booksnbrownsugar's review against another edition
3.0
I commend Gay for her vulnerability. Her situation in a whole is what draws me to mental health. To know the "why's" in your life to lead to such debilitating consequences/decisions. I continued reading hoping to gain empathy for her making the choice to see herself in the light she chose. And I guess I'm saying "choice" because it started with her initial decision to gain weight in order to not appear attractive due to her being gang raped at 12... even during the times where she was able to control it, lose the weight, only to panic about getting healthier and decided to gain it all back because she sees being overweight as a "safe space". She mentioned being offended that when she went to dr appointments that their leading diagnosis would be morbid obesity and then whatever it is she presented for, such as sore throat. She viewed it as them only focused on her weight and not caring about her actual complaint because they always address it but that is their job to do. Morbid obesity and assessment/plans takes precedence over a sore throat. That would be the same if she came in with an elevated blood sugar or extremely high blood pressure. Even if you went to the doctor for a sore throat, they would still address the most important matter. I hate that she perceived a lot of her family's concern as a burden but thankful that she recognized it as love. I always felt like her parents just wanted to see her HEALTHY, not necessarily THIN.. and those two terms are not parallel to each other.
kaylahipp's review against another edition
5.0
“Doctors are supposed to first do no harm, but when it comes to fat bodies, most doctors seem fundamentally incapable of heeding their oath.”
booksaremysuperpower's review against another edition
3.0
3.5 stars with a nod to 5 stars for the last quarter of the book. It took me so long to digest this book once I finished reading it. As one Goodreads reviewer accurately pointed out, it's not fair to judge a memoir based on the person's life, but rather how deftly he/she was able to tell their story. Here are some of the questions that kept popping up in my mind as I read the book: Is this a memoir or commentary? Can it be both? How much is an author required to reveal about a personal event? If there isn't a requirement as to how deep a writer can and should go and the writer chooses to not disclose details, then it is fair to ask why they are writing this story in the first place?
Roxane Gay, whose essay writing I adore, is attempting to have it both ways. She wants to reveal, but only on her terms, at her own pace, and it may or may not be her own personal truth. Within the pages, she often presents her story as a game for the reader. Her sentences are full of contractions. "I don't why..." "Maybe I do..." I think of it this way..." "Or maybe I don't...". She chooses what to reveal and what to hide. Her story during the "lost years" when she dropped out of school is vague, intentionally so, and her story ultimately could be anyone's. I found it strange that she wouldn't go into the foods that she ate or she wouldn't go into specifics about the people she fell into relationships with, but she felt it necessary to devote whole chapters to her love of Ina Garten and a very descriptive scene about cooking a blue apron meal. Some of these felt like filler, perhaps at the insistence of an editor in order to make it a full-fledged book rather than a novella.
Her voice shines through when she is talking about a being a very large woman and how she navigates the world. The scene in which she describes having to climb up onto a stage because there were no stairs showed me (not told me) exactly what her world is like. I wish she included more scenes like this - the more descriptive she was the better understanding I had, which I believe was her intention all along. Whether or not she was consistently successful at it is another thing altogether.
And then we come to last few chapters of the book. In just a handful of paragraphs in which she describes finding details about her rapist many years later and fantasizing what would happen if they met, what she would say, and detailing vividly what the lasting effects of having his distant but constant presence in her psyche has done to her romantic and sexual relationships, said more to me about who Roxane Gay is, what she's about, the type of writer she is, and her strength as a woman than anything else she wrote in this book. It haunted me for weeks. THAT one section is terrific, raw writing at its absolute finest. That entire section is why she is the writer she is.
I would still recommend this book to anyone who is a fan of Gay's essays or fiction. As I made my way through the first half, I wondered if her memoir wouldn't make more sense and have more power written in essay form instead. Turns out, pieces of this story had been published as essays. I just don't know if memoir form served her well or not.
Roxane Gay, whose essay writing I adore, is attempting to have it both ways. She wants to reveal, but only on her terms, at her own pace, and it may or may not be her own personal truth. Within the pages, she often presents her story as a game for the reader. Her sentences are full of contractions. "I don't why..." "Maybe I do..." I think of it this way..." "Or maybe I don't...". She chooses what to reveal and what to hide. Her story during the "lost years" when she dropped out of school is vague, intentionally so, and her story ultimately could be anyone's. I found it strange that she wouldn't go into the foods that she ate or she wouldn't go into specifics about the people she fell into relationships with, but she felt it necessary to devote whole chapters to her love of Ina Garten and a very descriptive scene about cooking a blue apron meal. Some of these felt like filler, perhaps at the insistence of an editor in order to make it a full-fledged book rather than a novella.
Her voice shines through when she is talking about a being a very large woman and how she navigates the world. The scene in which she describes having to climb up onto a stage because there were no stairs showed me (not told me) exactly what her world is like. I wish she included more scenes like this - the more descriptive she was the better understanding I had, which I believe was her intention all along. Whether or not she was consistently successful at it is another thing altogether.
And then we come to last few chapters of the book. In just a handful of paragraphs in which she describes finding details about her rapist many years later and fantasizing what would happen if they met, what she would say, and detailing vividly what the lasting effects of having his distant but constant presence in her psyche has done to her romantic and sexual relationships, said more to me about who Roxane Gay is, what she's about, the type of writer she is, and her strength as a woman than anything else she wrote in this book. It haunted me for weeks. THAT one section is terrific, raw writing at its absolute finest. That entire section is why she is the writer she is.
I would still recommend this book to anyone who is a fan of Gay's essays or fiction. As I made my way through the first half, I wondered if her memoir wouldn't make more sense and have more power written in essay form instead. Turns out, pieces of this story had been published as essays. I just don't know if memoir form served her well or not.
kry_yang's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual violence, Sexual assault, Eating disorder, and Fatphobia