boygirlparty's review
This book was recommended in the comments section of my favorite advice column, Ask Polly. As another reviewer stated, I always thought codependent meant the opposite of independent. It doesn't.
According to this book, it means someone who cannot establish self esteem from who they are independent of what they can do for others, it means someone who has trouble establishing boundaries. Interesting info, but I'm not sure what to do with it.
According to this book, it means someone who cannot establish self esteem from who they are independent of what they can do for others, it means someone who has trouble establishing boundaries. Interesting info, but I'm not sure what to do with it.
ookayden__'s review
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Fatphobia
Moderate: Ableism
essyem's review
4.0
Useful framework and examples, but I found the outdated language distracting at times.
spongebobbiii's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
3.0
A practical guide to understanding what codependency is, how it can show up in our lives, and how it can negatively harm our relationships. The author thoroughly explains the concept of codependency from years of working with clients as well as examining her own struggles with codependence. While the concepts are made clear and emphasized with real life examples, I often found myself feeling like some of these portrayals operated on the extreme end to make a point. Many of us deal with codependency, yet the symptoms of codependence can be so camouflaged. More nuanced examples would have been helpful to fully process through the material an highlight how it may look in everyday terms.
As a clinician, this book has been very helpful in adding language to my tool box to better explain codependence, the causes of codependence, and the different types of boundaries to clients
As a clinician, this book has been very helpful in adding language to my tool box to better explain codependence, the causes of codependence, and the different types of boundaries to clients
carmen_cruz's review
2.0
A confirmation bias compendium.
It has no real information, no statistics and no science. Reads like the diary of a flip floppy person who is trying to convince themselves and us that they are “doing the right thing” but never manages as they contradict themselves repeatedly on several instances.
The author stresses the importance of avoiding neglect and providing physical nurturing to children, so making the witholding of food a mayor problem only to say in the next chapter that it’s ok to let the child go hungry if they forget their lunch because it’s discipline.
The same goes for spanking. Huge importance is given to the fact that some ways of hitting are worse for the shame they create than for the actual pain occasioned but the author then goes on to say that light spanking (up to a certain age) and slapping children on the head are an ok way to discipline them.
Mostly nonsensical “spiritual but not religious” new age bs.
I give it 2 stars because at least it has taught me the value of consistency and the consequences of the lack thereof
It has no real information, no statistics and no science. Reads like the diary of a flip floppy person who is trying to convince themselves and us that they are “doing the right thing” but never manages as they contradict themselves repeatedly on several instances.
The author stresses the importance of avoiding neglect and providing physical nurturing to children, so making the witholding of food a mayor problem only to say in the next chapter that it’s ok to let the child go hungry if they forget their lunch because it’s discipline.
The same goes for spanking. Huge importance is given to the fact that some ways of hitting are worse for the shame they create than for the actual pain occasioned but the author then goes on to say that light spanking (up to a certain age) and slapping children on the head are an ok way to discipline them.
Mostly nonsensical “spiritual but not religious” new age bs.
I give it 2 stars because at least it has taught me the value of consistency and the consequences of the lack thereof
aabigailsmithh's review
This book over-pathologizes and uses shaming language. Not a fan.
gladys_the_tog's review
5.0
This book was recommended to me by my therapist. It is a very good intro into understanding what Codependence is, how it is created, and how it manifests. If you are looking to understand Codependence in a clean, easy to understand way, I definitely recommend this book. I enjoyed the audio book version, but I would have appreciated being able to note the margin in a book.
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