htb2050's review
3.0
It was good but she botched the ending. She advises the men to stop joining military, stop joining law enforcement and stop joining other positions of power and asks men to just stop participating in the general life which is a pretty bad advice if you ask me.
brookeacacia's review against another edition
0.25
Horrible. Cherry picked, out of context bits of data that are utterly shameful for someone with a PhD. Willfully ignoring overwhelming other relevant stats. The epitome of a ‘pick me’ book. Negative stars.
linklex7's review against another edition
4.0
It really interesting book that dares to say what so many are afraid to say. That men can be oppressed just as much as women can be. This isn’t an attack on women. However, it does point out some advantages women have over men, regarding family court, paternity rights, and more. If you can keep an open mind, I think this book will enlighten you.
theartolater's review against another edition
2.0
I expected better.
There's a knee-jerk reaction in internet circles to dismiss any concern of the state of men in any form as basic "men's rights" complaints that tend to go too far or address really minor points in a broader scheme. While there are a lot of extremists on all sides of the gender divide, that many will dismiss this book outright because it's about how men are perceived in society and how that perception is impacting men's participation in society in general is wrong. Unfortunately, for anyone with more than a passing curiosity on the issue, this book brings nothing new to the table while presenting an argument sure to turn off exactly the people who might need to hear it.
The good things this book does is bring a lot of the legitimate complaints to the forefront - for example, that there is an adverse and irrational fear of men around children, that universities and colleges have swung rather wildly in the direction of some of the more extreme feminist points of view in reaction to how higher education treated women before the feminist movement, the inequity in family court proceedings, and so on. As a case study of the current situation, it works.
The biggest problem is the ideological bent. The author, Helen Smith, puts her libertarian leanings on display very early. On one hand, it's good to see a person profess their leanings up front. On the other, that she leans so much on Objectivist language, including references to Ayn Rand and "going Galt," it's almost sure to turn off a lot of people who should be aware of the situations she writes about from the start. There was no need to frame the arguments in that way, as it is sure to leave out many people on both sides with an interest. A close second is the "handbook" of sorts at the end of how men can avoid being trapped in bad situations, which just comes off really poorly and reinforces stereotypes rather than offering positive options. It left me less sympathetic than I was going into that final chapter.
There's definitely a book that needs to be out there regarding men's issues and how they relate to the current world, especially involving education and family/divorce issues. This book is getting a lot of press, and while attention to the issue is a good thing, this book probably shouldn't be the one to do it.
There's a knee-jerk reaction in internet circles to dismiss any concern of the state of men in any form as basic "men's rights" complaints that tend to go too far or address really minor points in a broader scheme. While there are a lot of extremists on all sides of the gender divide, that many will dismiss this book outright because it's about how men are perceived in society and how that perception is impacting men's participation in society in general is wrong. Unfortunately, for anyone with more than a passing curiosity on the issue, this book brings nothing new to the table while presenting an argument sure to turn off exactly the people who might need to hear it.
The good things this book does is bring a lot of the legitimate complaints to the forefront - for example, that there is an adverse and irrational fear of men around children, that universities and colleges have swung rather wildly in the direction of some of the more extreme feminist points of view in reaction to how higher education treated women before the feminist movement, the inequity in family court proceedings, and so on. As a case study of the current situation, it works.
The biggest problem is the ideological bent. The author, Helen Smith, puts her libertarian leanings on display very early. On one hand, it's good to see a person profess their leanings up front. On the other, that she leans so much on Objectivist language, including references to Ayn Rand and "going Galt," it's almost sure to turn off a lot of people who should be aware of the situations she writes about from the start. There was no need to frame the arguments in that way, as it is sure to leave out many people on both sides with an interest. A close second is the "handbook" of sorts at the end of how men can avoid being trapped in bad situations, which just comes off really poorly and reinforces stereotypes rather than offering positive options. It left me less sympathetic than I was going into that final chapter.
There's definitely a book that needs to be out there regarding men's issues and how they relate to the current world, especially involving education and family/divorce issues. This book is getting a lot of press, and while attention to the issue is a good thing, this book probably shouldn't be the one to do it.
billydoubledown's review against another edition
2.0
I am definitely not this author's target audience as a queer man but I am interested in men's issues especially with regards to father's access and relationships with children. This book was definitely a poor choice to start with in the area as it was very anecdotal and lacked many research sources that I could look into for myself. As I struggled through this conservative mess, I could shake the feeling of being talked at instead of too and the ending less me feeling queasy and desperately in need of some pancakes. I guess I was just expecting more than I got.. oh well, it was free at the library so god bless.
norma_cenva's review against another edition
5.0
Well, now - after Goodreads for some reason did not save my first review... let's try again!
If I could ask everyone to just read one book this year, it will be this one. It is now more important then ever. The fundamentalist-religion of third wave feminism contributed to making life unbearable for modern men and boys. And it does not look like it will be getting better any time soon! Both MGTOW and Men's Human Right's activists are gaining remarkably, but in the eyes of the general public the torment and tragedy knows intimately to every man, is ignored, and many still minimise it or blatantly pretend it does not exist.
As an egalitarian or if you prefer just a non-feminist, I implore you please, check this book out it might give you hope that a better future IS possible.
If I could ask everyone to just read one book this year, it will be this one. It is now more important then ever. The fundamentalist-religion of third wave feminism contributed to making life unbearable for modern men and boys. And it does not look like it will be getting better any time soon! Both MGTOW and Men's Human Right's activists are gaining remarkably, but in the eyes of the general public the torment and tragedy knows intimately to every man, is ignored, and many still minimise it or blatantly pretend it does not exist.
As an egalitarian or if you prefer just a non-feminist, I implore you please, check this book out it might give you hope that a better future IS possible.
trish204's review
5.0
How do many people start their reviews when reading such a book? Oh, right: Unpopular Opinion Time!
Nowadays, everyone is supposed to be what society calls a feminist. Let me be clear here: I'm female and I want equality. BUT: if a woman wants a job (for example), she needs to be just as qualified as any male applicant. I'm also very much against simplified physical tests for females in the armed forces and police force (yes, it's happening). What I despise and loathe most of all, though, are women who don't really want what feminism was started for: they don't want equality - what they want is revenge.
People keep throwing around catchphrases about being inclusive and everyone having the right to be treated equally and fairly, yet it doesn’t seem to apply to (straight) men. You can’t change what color your skin has and you can’t change with what gender you’re born with, yet there is so much hostility nowadays towards men!
Thus has started a witch hunt resulting in men no longer being wanted. And it doesn't even matter what field we're talking about. Men aren't supposed to have an opinion, let alone voice one. Men aren't even supposed to have rights. From men being required to pay for children that aren't genetically theirs (a law that doesn't just exist in the US by the way), to fake rape allegations (which harm actual rape victims just as much).
Speaking of rape victims - despite this not being the book’s message, it’s one more example of the stakes being stacked against men if you ask me - I need to state how horrified I am about so little being reported, let alone being done about male rape victims and our culture that shames them and forces so many of them to keep quiet. Something that is deemed terrible and unacceptable when happening to women is done on an even larger scale to men and everyone is just OK with it (or keeping quiet)?! Seriously?!
Throughout history, there have been horrible men and they have done horrible things to women. Misogyny is real and terrible. Even today, although the situation has absolutely gotten better already. But the answer is not to do to men what men have done to women. Chiefly because most of today's men haven't done anything wrong. It’s stupid and counterproductive.
The result of all this fake feminism? Men don't want to get married, they don't want to start families. Old values go down the drain faster than you would believe. And while I don't think everyone needs to be in this state of perfect-happy-family-from-the-50s, I do see a problem in nobody wanting to get married and having any kids (though Earth might be thankful if we stop reproducing). Fewer and fewer men also go to college or universities (since academia is full of man-haters and yes, I can confirm the author's thesis from personal experience), which is a problem if we as a species actually want to progress because while we need female scientists, we also need male ones.
In short: balance is key and humanity is so far off balance, it's not even funny anymore.
This book doesn't necessarily want to be a guide-book offering solutions. Rather, the (female, by the way) author wants to show what is going wrong in the world and what the consequences are, thus gently nudging people to get back on track.
I honestly kept yelling „YES! EXACTLY“ while listening to the audiobook and was shocked, appalled, glad and relieved (yes, all at the same time) to find out I’m NOT the only one seeing this phenomenon and being against what is nowadays called feminism, that it is indeed real and indeed a problem.
I recently read a book about what this false feminism does to boys which is why I wanted to read this book about the adults those boys grow up into. I recommend reading both to anyone interested in a rounded-off reading experience and who doesn't shy away from looking at topics in a differentiated way instead of just blindly following hypes.
Nowadays, everyone is supposed to be what society calls a feminist. Let me be clear here: I'm female and I want equality. BUT: if a woman wants a job (for example), she needs to be just as qualified as any male applicant. I'm also very much against simplified physical tests for females in the armed forces and police force (yes, it's happening). What I despise and loathe most of all, though, are women who don't really want what feminism was started for: they don't want equality - what they want is revenge.
People keep throwing around catchphrases about being inclusive and everyone having the right to be treated equally and fairly, yet it doesn’t seem to apply to (straight) men. You can’t change what color your skin has and you can’t change with what gender you’re born with, yet there is so much hostility nowadays towards men!
Thus has started a witch hunt resulting in men no longer being wanted. And it doesn't even matter what field we're talking about. Men aren't supposed to have an opinion, let alone voice one. Men aren't even supposed to have rights. From men being required to pay for children that aren't genetically theirs (a law that doesn't just exist in the US by the way), to fake rape allegations (which harm actual rape victims just as much).
Speaking of rape victims - despite this not being the book’s message, it’s one more example of the stakes being stacked against men if you ask me - I need to state how horrified I am about so little being reported, let alone being done about male rape victims and our culture that shames them and forces so many of them to keep quiet. Something that is deemed terrible and unacceptable when happening to women is done on an even larger scale to men and everyone is just OK with it (or keeping quiet)?! Seriously?!
Throughout history, there have been horrible men and they have done horrible things to women. Misogyny is real and terrible. Even today, although the situation has absolutely gotten better already. But the answer is not to do to men what men have done to women. Chiefly because most of today's men haven't done anything wrong. It’s stupid and counterproductive.
The result of all this fake feminism? Men don't want to get married, they don't want to start families. Old values go down the drain faster than you would believe. And while I don't think everyone needs to be in this state of perfect-happy-family-from-the-50s, I do see a problem in nobody wanting to get married and having any kids (though Earth might be thankful if we stop reproducing). Fewer and fewer men also go to college or universities (since academia is full of man-haters and yes, I can confirm the author's thesis from personal experience), which is a problem if we as a species actually want to progress because while we need female scientists, we also need male ones.
In short: balance is key and humanity is so far off balance, it's not even funny anymore.
This book doesn't necessarily want to be a guide-book offering solutions. Rather, the (female, by the way) author wants to show what is going wrong in the world and what the consequences are, thus gently nudging people to get back on track.
I honestly kept yelling „YES! EXACTLY“ while listening to the audiobook and was shocked, appalled, glad and relieved (yes, all at the same time) to find out I’m NOT the only one seeing this phenomenon and being against what is nowadays called feminism, that it is indeed real and indeed a problem.
I recently read a book about what this false feminism does to boys which is why I wanted to read this book about the adults those boys grow up into. I recommend reading both to anyone interested in a rounded-off reading experience and who doesn't shy away from looking at topics in a differentiated way instead of just blindly following hypes.
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