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jmiles758's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Bullying, Child death, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gore, Hate crime, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Transphobia, Violence, Blood, Kidnapping, Grief, Religious bigotry, Murder, Outing, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail
dinosher's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
This is how Vivek was born, after death and into grief.
Went into this book blind but came out with such a heavy heart, it broke me in more ways than one. It's incredible how the author managed to capture the essence of grief in such a tragic yet gentle way. I'm a very slow reader but with this book, I was just so eager to discover Vivek's story that the pages felt like they were just turning themselves. This book is about the death of Vivek Oji, it's about the life he has lead before, it's a story about Vivek Oji. At the same time, it's so much more than that, it's about all the people that love him in their own ways, it's about all the ways they tried to protect him, it's about who they thought he was.
How could he be gone when he'd overtaken us so completely while he was here?
The combined amount of chapters we get to venture inside Vivek's mind are limited. Instead, we get told who he is through the perspectives of other people. We slowly uncover the truth about the what happened on the day of his death while venturing deeper into all the moments before his death, we get to see all the memories that made Vivek.
They barely understood him themselves, but they loved him, and that had been enough.
All the characters felt like they were jumping off the pages, bursting with their own personalities and stories, you could tell that the author wrote them as individuals and not just side characters. I felt especially connected to the women in the story, they were not just wives, they were also mothers, sisters, daughters and survivors, every one of them were once bright young girls as well. The author really expresses how such a conservative community tears people apart from the inside out in the most brutal way, with beautiful prose.
I know what they say about men who allow other men to penetrate them. Ugly things; ugly words. Calling them women, as if that's supposed to be ugly too.
Vivek's story was just heartbreaking to read, how he must've suffered when he was forced to hide his true self in such a restrictive community, to hide his happiest side from his parents. The rage when Vivek's mother finally uncovered this side of her child, how was she supposed to deal with the knowledge of having to mourn someone who was so familiar yet so unrecognizable? The way acceptance of Vivek's death was found in in end was just gut wrenching. Vivek was truly loved, no matter who he was.
I want to thank him for loving me.
Graphic: Death, Homophobia, Incest, Misogyny, Transphobia, and Grief
Moderate: Domestic abuse and Violence
Minor: Miscarriage
turidt's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.5
Graphic: Biphobia, Death, Homophobia, Transphobia, Grief, and Lesbophobia
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Hate crime, Infertility, Infidelity, Miscarriage, Rape, Sexual content, Violence, and Pregnancy
Minor: Blood and Alcohol
michaelion's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Akwaeke Emezi, the person that you are. You've done it yet again. I can't wait to read all their books. They are truly amazing.
Graphic: Body horror, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Incest, Infidelity, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Blood, Grief, Religious bigotry, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Animal death, Biphobia, Deadnaming, Gore, Homophobia, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Transphobia, Violence, Death of parent, Lesbophobia, Outing, Gaslighting, Colonisation, and Dysphoria
Minor: Confinement, Hate crime, Miscarriage, Vomit, Murder, and Abandonment
kjofalltrades's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Child death, Death, Homophobia, Incest, Infertility, Infidelity, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Transphobia, Violence, Grief, Religious bigotry, Outing, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Domestic abuse
tinyjude's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
I wish that instead of seeing Vivek/Nnembi from everyone's points of view, we got more from her inner world and how she felt in those final months. Especially with all the gender fluidity and sexual identity that could have been explored through her lens. My biggest complain is the incest like WHAT THE FUCK? they could have been childhood friends and that would have made this so much more enjoyable, but making them cousins... I hated every second of it. Also, why is everyone fucking everyone without their partners' knowing? WHY ARE YOU CHEATING AND SAYING YOU LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND???? I DONT GET IT.
After so much transphobic comments from his parents, I am glad that his mom accepted him, even though it was too late and her reactions at first hurt so much to read.
The grandma was my favourite character. She rules even after death, she would have loved Vivek/Nnembi so much.
Graphic: Animal death, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Incest, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Sexual content, Transphobia, Blood, Grief, Religious bigotry, and Dysphoria
torturedreadersdept's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
Graphic: Animal death, Body horror, Body shaming, Bullying, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Incest, Infertility, Infidelity, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Transphobia, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Grief, Death of parent, Lesbophobia, Fire/Fire injury, Outing, Abandonment, Alcohol, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Deadnaming, Toxic relationship, and Toxic friendship
Minor: Alcoholism, Miscarriage, Islamophobia, and Pregnancy
kasarin's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Death, Homophobia, Incest, Transphobia, and Grief
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Infidelity, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Violence, and Religious bigotry
Minor: Animal death, Hate crime, Infertility, Miscarriage, Lesbophobia, and Sexual harassment
miaaa_lenaaa's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Potentially spoilers!!
‘Some people can't see softness without wanting to hurt it.’
‘if you didn't tell other people, was it real or was it just something the two of you were telling yourselves?’
‘“I’m not sure my belief matters," he says. "If it is, it is, whether I believe it or not."’
‘ No one else could feel that lifetime of loss. No one else had lost him more than she had, yet they cried in front of her as if it meant something. They're still children, Kavita tried to tell herself, not mature enough to do her the courtesy of keeping their tears in their bedrooms, among their own complete families. But still she thought of them as selfish brats without home training or compassion or empathy, and this in turn made her angry at these girls she knew she still loved, somewhere under the rage and pain and the grief that she felt belonged to her and only her.’
‘“We can't keep insisting he was who we thought he was, when he wanted to be someone else and he died being that person, Chika. We failed, don't you see We didn't see him and we failed."’
‘when you've stood on ground and known your child's bones are rotting beneath you, rage and ego fade like dust in a strong wind.’
Graphic: Animal death, Child abuse, Death, Homophobia, Infidelity, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual content, Transphobia, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Grief, Religious bigotry, and Injury/Injury detail
morganperks's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Ableism, Alcoholism, Animal death, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Child death, Confinement, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Hate crime, Incest, Infertility, Infidelity, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Self harm, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Xenophobia, Medical content, Religious bigotry, Death of parent, Murder, Pregnancy, Lesbophobia, Fire/Fire injury, Outing, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, Dysphoria, War, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Racism
Minor: Drug use and Blood