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kalkie's review against another edition
3.0
This is an interesting little book, detailing the life of "Elizabeth" Kim, born to a Korean mother and American GI father. Brandished a honhyol (a "non-person") because of her mixed race, her early life was filled with jeers and abuse from the other villagers where Elizabeth and her mother lived in relative isolation. When she was a young girl, her mother was killed by her father and brother in an "honour killing" for bringing shame on the family. Elizabeth escaped a life of slavery and was instead sent to an orphanage in Seoul.
The orphanage, run by missionaries, was in an appalling state of repair, and the children spent most of their days in "cages" lined along the edges of the main room of the orphanage. There was lttle food, and no love shown to the children living there. When she was about 6 years old, "Elizabeth"" (as no-one knew her real name, this was a given name) was adopted by an American couple who were christian fundamentalists, and was taken to live in the American West.
This book thus follows a life of abuse meted out with the name of god, and Elizabeth's subsequent abusive marriage and escape into relative freedom.
However traumatic the tale in this book is, unfortunately it is not one I haven't heard before. With the recent rise in "childhood abuse" memoirs such as Dave Pelzer's A Boy Called "It" or Julie Gregory's Sickened, it is a genre which all too readily pulls at the heart strings. That said, I was also incredibly angry in places with Elizabeth's behaviour. She was so "accepting" of her parents' behaviour, even when she was an adult she didn't rebel against them. And her treatment of her own daughter made me so angry. She clearly cannot see that the emotional pressure she put on her own daughter - making a "pact" that she wouldn't kill herself until her daughter was a teenager - is tantamount to the same level of emotional abuse her own parents put her through.
I found this a book of emotional highs and lows, and while there wasn't a nice neat "conclusion" or "answer" at the end of the book - probably because Kim herself hasn't reached her own conclusions on what has happened - I did find it an interesting and engaging book to read.
The orphanage, run by missionaries, was in an appalling state of repair, and the children spent most of their days in "cages" lined along the edges of the main room of the orphanage. There was lttle food, and no love shown to the children living there. When she was about 6 years old, "Elizabeth"" (as no-one knew her real name, this was a given name) was adopted by an American couple who were christian fundamentalists, and was taken to live in the American West.
This book thus follows a life of abuse meted out with the name of god, and Elizabeth's subsequent abusive marriage and escape into relative freedom.
However traumatic the tale in this book is, unfortunately it is not one I haven't heard before. With the recent rise in "childhood abuse" memoirs such as Dave Pelzer's A Boy Called "It" or Julie Gregory's Sickened, it is a genre which all too readily pulls at the heart strings. That said, I was also incredibly angry in places with Elizabeth's behaviour. She was so "accepting" of her parents' behaviour, even when she was an adult she didn't rebel against them. And her treatment of her own daughter made me so angry. She clearly cannot see that the emotional pressure she put on her own daughter - making a "pact" that she wouldn't kill herself until her daughter was a teenager - is tantamount to the same level of emotional abuse her own parents put her through.
I found this a book of emotional highs and lows, and while there wasn't a nice neat "conclusion" or "answer" at the end of the book - probably because Kim herself hasn't reached her own conclusions on what has happened - I did find it an interesting and engaging book to read.
willowfae's review against another edition
4.0
This was an inspirational story of a child overcoming tragedy and growing into a woman with a child of her own. The events of her life in Korea have long reaching consequences on the way she views herself and others around her. At the end we learn how she has learnt to move on and reconcile herself with what happened to her.
eve81's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
fast-paced
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Torture, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Religious bigotry, and Colonisation
pikalexi's review against another edition
4.0
Fantastic. One of the best memoirs I've read - doesn't shirk from the pain but also doesn't give unnecessary details for the pleasure of the audience (as many memoirs expressing a childhood of abuse seem to do, and I find very difficult to read.) Raw and genuine, doesn't hide from the pain but doesn't revel in it - straightforward and touching. Great novel.
hollysue22's review against another edition
5.0
really enjoyed this book. it's amazing what this woman has gone through and overcome.
marielee207's review against another edition
I wrote a whole article on why this book seems too good to be true... because it's not true! Some of the stuff is even plagiarized from other work (by white people) that is also inaccurate. Publishing tries to give people what they want (even thru stereotypes) not necessarily what's real. Think of all the Oprah "too good" memoirs that turned out to be completely FAKE. Unfortunately there's a lot.
I greatly ADMIRE people who want to learn about other cultures and be warned that you may be consuming false stereotypes.
For anyone who wants to know why this book suddenly was withdrawn a few weeks after publication = also why perpetuates HARMFUL INACCURATE stereotypes about Korea:
https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/american-dirt-korean-angelas-ashes/
I greatly ADMIRE people who want to learn about other cultures and be warned that you may be consuming false stereotypes.
For anyone who wants to know why this book suddenly was withdrawn a few weeks after publication = also why perpetuates HARMFUL INACCURATE stereotypes about Korea:
https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/american-dirt-korean-angelas-ashes/
barrettcmyk's review against another edition
5.0
I’m not even sure how to sum this up without sounding trite — Ten Thousand Sorrows is the story of a woman who, at age 5, witnesses her mother’s honor killing. The crime? Having sex out of wedlock and giving birth to a mixed race child.
That’s just the first 5 pages.
The rest of the story is an autobiographical account of what happens next. It’s hard to fathom the life Kim has led, much less the ability to write about it. Kim (who obviously becomes a writer) puts it into a narrative that’s straight forward and stark. The only real exception, to me, is when Kim talks about her mother, and her life in Korea before. Her descriptions there are vibrant, warm, colorful, rich.
A heartbreaking read, to be sure, but an engaging overlay of so many topics: the relationship between mother and child, adoption, the social fallout of war, cross-cultural relationships, race, violence against women, healing, and memory.
I’m sure that review does it no justice. Just go read the book.
That’s just the first 5 pages.
The rest of the story is an autobiographical account of what happens next. It’s hard to fathom the life Kim has led, much less the ability to write about it. Kim (who obviously becomes a writer) puts it into a narrative that’s straight forward and stark. The only real exception, to me, is when Kim talks about her mother, and her life in Korea before. Her descriptions there are vibrant, warm, colorful, rich.
A heartbreaking read, to be sure, but an engaging overlay of so many topics: the relationship between mother and child, adoption, the social fallout of war, cross-cultural relationships, race, violence against women, healing, and memory.
I’m sure that review does it no justice. Just go read the book.