minty's review against another edition
3.0
The author is really quite funny, so this was an entirely enjoyable read. Some of her comments about marriage are indeed universal, and both felt thought-provoking and just relatable. However, it's also very, very much about being a parent (and thus a coparent) so as a childless person those parts were less for me. The story about their cross-country drive with their kids would, I bet, be absolutely hilarious to a parent.
roseybot's review against another edition
4.0
Straight women really do have it hard, and I say this with a gentle amusement cause of course they don't.
cdlindwall's review against another edition
5.0
I always have so much less to say about the books I love, which I feel reflects poorly on my personality.
Either way, I loved this book entirely. It's a peek inside the extremely bumpy terrain of long-term domesticity, from the perspective of someone prone to introspection, dissatisfaction, big feelings, and ambitious notions of what her life ought to be. It's also a love letter to her husband, no matter how many times in the book Heather acknowledges she also hates him and his poorly formed frontal lobe. Because that is life. Both/and. That's certainly intimacy, too, and it's certainly marriage.
The book also was extremely funny while it was moving, thoughtful, and romantic. And I never found her insufferable or saccharine. This is my favorite of Heather's books that I've read.
Either way, I loved this book entirely. It's a peek inside the extremely bumpy terrain of long-term domesticity, from the perspective of someone prone to introspection, dissatisfaction, big feelings, and ambitious notions of what her life ought to be. It's also a love letter to her husband, no matter how many times in the book Heather acknowledges she also hates him and his poorly formed frontal lobe. Because that is life. Both/and. That's certainly intimacy, too, and it's certainly marriage.
The book also was extremely funny while it was moving, thoughtful, and romantic. And I never found her insufferable or saccharine. This is my favorite of Heather's books that I've read.
madzking's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
3.5
morgs777's review against another edition
3.0
I’m honestly not super sure on how I feel about this book.
I love Havrilesky’s work, love How To Be a Person in the World, I pay for her newsletter.
Some of the book I have highlighted and written in the margins in agreement. I think the author is a great champion of asking for what you want, and not settling.
The View recently went after her about shit-talking her husband, and she went off on Twitter about how the book is about how she’s the asshole. It reminds me a bit of But You Seemed So Happy.
I think it’s enjoyable, worth a read, honest about marriage…
But I am a little tired of women complaining about their marriage to great men
I love Havrilesky’s work, love How To Be a Person in the World, I pay for her newsletter.
Some of the book I have highlighted and written in the margins in agreement. I think the author is a great champion of asking for what you want, and not settling.
The View recently went after her about shit-talking her husband, and she went off on Twitter about how the book is about how she’s the asshole. It reminds me a bit of But You Seemed So Happy.
I think it’s enjoyable, worth a read, honest about marriage…
But I am a little tired of women complaining about their marriage to great men
annadirknowitzki's review against another edition
emotional
funny
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
I am Heather Havrilesky, Heather Havrilesky is me. I am a hopeless romantic and an asshole and often afraid of my desires and chronically disappointed and want to be hopeful for the future. This book was a hit straight to the darkest corners of my heart. It made me hopeful, handed the reins over to my desires. I will be reading it again.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Cancer
Minor: Infidelity
seshutts's review against another edition
4.0
This book really divides people into two groups, people who think the author is cruel or displaying poor taste in her descriptions of her husband’s shortcomings and those who thinks she is delightfully honest. I think it’s clear, once you have read the whole book, she has a great marriage and loves and appreciates her spouse. However, she has a dramatic writing style and uses comic exaggeration in a way we aren’t used to hearing about a spouse. I think her work as advice columnist also leads her to constantly study her marriage, her husband and herself, in a way few people have the time or inclination for. I think as book about the concept of marriage, this is a fail. This works as a memoir of her own individual marriage, with one spouse an intense driven perfectionist, the other more of a calm stabilizing force. Their personalities mesh well together, even if some of the behavior described (mostly from the author) wouldn’t fly in other marriages. She, like this book, will not be to everyone’s taste, but the fans out there are big ones.