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cheye13's review against another edition
funny
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
This was a perfect book. For me. I cannot and do not widely recommend this. This is a very specific book for a very specific type of person.
First of all: the band in the book is not One Direction - but it's One Direction. This book is for people who were (are) intense One Direction fans during their hype, but on the older end (like fans 18 & up, rather than 13-16yos they were initially marketed to); fans who were just as crazy, but had a smidgen of self-awareness about it. Fans who read/wrote RPF but didn't genuinely believe any of the band was secretly dating each other. Fans who now look back on One Direction and think "they were (are) just regular dudes." A heavy and specifically boyband fanaticism with a sprinkling of realism. Probably also helpful if the reader's a queer woman (and managed to avoid that whole "i'm gonna marry [boybander]" phenomenon).
This book isn't written like a marketable, mainstream novel. It's written like a - very good - boyband fanfiction. I'm obsessed with it. This may be my favorite book of the year.
EDITED TO ADD: you know that Bob's Burgers episode where Louise wants to slap BooBoo? Take that, age it up, satirize it a little further, and pad out the plot to fill a novel. i.e. if you Understood™ Louise in that episode, you'll get this book.
First of all: the band in the book is not One Direction - but it's One Direction. This book is for people who were (are) intense One Direction fans during their hype, but on the older end (like fans 18 & up, rather than 13-16yos they were initially marketed to); fans who were just as crazy, but had a smidgen of self-awareness about it. Fans who read/wrote RPF but didn't genuinely believe any of the band was secretly dating each other. Fans who now look back on One Direction and think "they were (are) just regular dudes." A heavy and specifically boyband fanaticism with a sprinkling of realism. Probably also helpful if the reader's a queer woman (and managed to avoid that whole "i'm gonna marry [boybander]" phenomenon).
This book isn't written like a marketable, mainstream novel. It's written like a - very good - boyband fanfiction. I'm obsessed with it. This may be my favorite book of the year.
EDITED TO ADD: you know that Bob's Burgers episode where Louise wants to slap BooBoo? Take that, age it up, satirize it a little further, and pad out the plot to fill a novel. i.e. if you Understood™ Louise in that episode, you'll get this book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Ableism, Death, Kidnapping, Stalking, Murder, and Gaslighting
Moderate: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual assault, and Outing
Minor: Body shaming, Bullying, Drug abuse, Fatphobia, Homophobia, Racism, Suicide, Grief, Death of parent, and Toxic friendship
difficult to discern when the fatphobia was intentional (i.e. from character pov) or incidental from the author's pov. readers are likely prepared for the manner of sexual assault the girls perpetrate on the boy band (limited to groping and lewd comments), but likely unprepared for the manner of sexual assault committed by one of the boys on a female fan:crankyblue's review against another edition
dark
funny
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
2.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Kidnapping
Moderate: Suicide
trulydevious's review against another edition
dark
funny
reflective
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Kidnapping, Stalking, Death of parent, and Murder
Moderate: Body shaming, Cursing, Fatphobia, Homophobia, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Suicide, Grief, Outing, and Sexual harassment
subjecta5's review against another edition
dark
funny
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body shaming, Fatphobia, Homophobia, and Kidnapping
Moderate: Mental illness, Suicide, and Murder
Minor: Sexual assault, Grief, and Death of parent
magicalghoul's review against another edition
dark
funny
mysterious
fast-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
First off: Mind the discussion of slut-shaming tw. I'm not putting it in spoiler tags because it's somehow central to the plot and could be highly upsetting. Please take care.
Now, about the book: Enjoyed the concept and the writing style but the rampant fatphobia and the smidge of racism really ruined it for me— just because it's satire or dark humor doesn't mean you get a free pass to punch down.
The outdated (even for 2016) teen slang sometimes took me out as well, but on a second thought I'm glad it went for a known evil (tumblr fandom slang) over a recent one (stolen aave in stan circles).
It was entertaining at least, even if I found myself wishing it had pushed for more at times. Solid three star book.
Now, about the book: Enjoyed the concept and the writing style but the rampant fatphobia and the smidge of racism really ruined it for me— just because it's satire or dark humor doesn't mean you get a free pass to punch down.
The outdated (even for 2016) teen slang sometimes took me out as well, but on a second thought I'm glad it went for a known evil (tumblr fandom slang) over a recent one (stolen aave in stan circles).
It was entertaining at least, even if I found myself wishing it had pushed for more at times. Solid three star book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body shaming, Death, Fatphobia, Homophobia, Racism, and Kidnapping
Moderate: Mental illness, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicide, Toxic relationship, and Grief
A character tells another about a situation where she was humiliated and slut shamed.radiocryptid's review against another edition
fast-paced
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.0
Holy shit this is the worst book I've ever read and I've read shitty books in my time. Where to even begin wow there is so much hot garbage in this book: racism, sexism, homophobia, fatphobia not to mention just bad storytelling and weak characters. It's about four girls who "accidently" kidnap a member of the Boy Band "The Ruperts" who are all named Rupert. Okay this is going to be spoiler ridden, I mean I don't think you should read the book anyway, but spoiler warning ahead. Also C/W for sexual assault, murder, suicide mention, homophobia, slut-shaming and racism.
so it begins with our main girl Frances otherwise known as "Baby", first of all, what the actual fuck kind of nickname is that? Frances is your classic plain girl, wide-eyed, innocent, with extensive knowledge of 80s movies. By extensive knowledge I mean Ferris Bueller's Day Off and well, that's about it. Her dad died a couple of years ago and she wears a hand made friendship bracelet with "daddy" charms on it. Which is very fucking weird. She had no personality, no urge to do anything and she constantly talks about it, like she's self aware that she's really boring and doesn't fight to do anything and so complains about it. I don't understand this at ALL. There are three other girls in the group, all fans of the boy band The Ruperts. I'll get to The Ruperts later. I want to focus on one of the girls, her name is Apple, and she is fat and asian and a crybaby with no backbone, which is her entire fleshed out personality. She is the butt of all the jokes and has a stereotypical housemaid named Consuella, three guesses as to what her background is. Apple is a horrid fangirl who doesn't care about The Rupert's personal space or decent behaviour on the slightest. The story starts with her KNOCKING OUT Rupert P and TYING HIM UP IN HER HOTEL ROOM. She then proceeds to hump him, touch him, lick him, sit on his lap shirtless and take photos of him. It's so disturbing and disrespectful. She is a horrible person and the book is written for you to feel sorry for her because Rupert P calls her a "whale" at one point in the book. HE WAS FUCKING KIDNAPPED BY HER HE CAN CALL HER WHATEVER HE LIKES. Not to mention Apple's complete disrespect for Rupert P's sexuality. In fact, everyone is really horrible about it. Making fun of him for being secretive about it, over sexualising him. Not to mention the amount of times they made fun of him for having a gambling problem. Countless times, and I mean probably HUNDREDS of times throughout the book Rupert P is known as a dropkick, flop, day ruiner and general idiot. He is a huge celebrity and is doing his goddamn best to fit into a band he doesn't feel like he's talented enough to be in for fucks sake give him a break. Frances tries to free him at one point but the knots are too tight so she just,,,gives up???? what the fuck??? Why??? I don't understand what logic is behind this???? and then later on Rupert pulls free and he just,,,hangs around???? He doesn't run????? He just stands there to reveal some tiny plot point????? And then the girls tie him up again???????? what the fuck is going on??????????? I'm going to move on to the third girl in the group of rupert's fans; Erin. Erin is a basic bitch through and through. She's popular, skinny and blonde. So of course Frances feels like she isn't deserving of being her friend. Erin's backstory is that she used to be a Rupert's fan but at a show she went to once, snuck backstage and waited, NAKED, in one of the member's room to have sex with him. And she did have sex with him. They're the same age, but it's still fucked and although Erin should not have invaded their privacy like that, he shouldn't have agreed to have sex with her because of that kind of power dynamic. The band member (I think it's Rupert L) proceeds to take photos of Erin naked and send it to the other band members. This is fucked up and horrific, Erin did not deserve this and it is sexual abuse. When Erin tells this to Frances, who is supposedly her friend, Frances doesn't really care. She still loves the Ruperts and chooses them over her friend who was abused by them. Not to mention that Erin's actions do not depict someone who has gone through a traumatic event and it's actually very offensive to write her going through that and her then to think revenge is the way to go, when has a victim ever acted like that? Erin's abuse is written in a dramatised theatrical way with no research behind it and no empathy or kindness. Erin should have gotten the help she deserved, she should have gotten the time and space to tell her story but instead, it was bulldozed by Frances saying how much she loves the Ruperts. It's so fucked up .
I'm going to move on to the real turning point of the story, the point I thought would have made the book better. The girls return to the hotel room after roaming around for a bit to find Rupert P dead. I thought, finally yes the girls are going to be pushed to make some moral decisions and question their ethics, but instead, all they do is moan and whine. They dump Rupert P back into his penthouse hotel room with the other Rupert's, the girls have to hide in a cupboard as the other Ruperts just arrive back as well. And what do they do seeing their close friend and bandmate dead on a bean bag? Slut shame him and cry about how the band is going to break up now. Yup. I know. What in the actual fuck. The only Rupert that had any sense was Rupert K, who just happened to be Frances' favourite and also they kiss and have a little love story which is so fucked up on so many levels. You would think the story would end with the Rupert's calling the police and having a full on investigation but oh no instead Rupert X (side note, Barret Wilbert Weed, the person reading the audiobook, does not know how to pronounce Xavier and it is so frustrating) and Rupert K THROUGH RUPERT P OFF THE BUILDING TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE A SUICIDE EVEN THOUGH HE WAS STRANGLED TO DEATH AND IT'S VERY OBVIOUS AND WOULD SHOW UP IN THE AUTOPSY LIKE WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK????? Okay but let's talk about who actually murdered Rupert P, because it wasn't any of the girls and it wasn't any of the Ruperts and it wasn't suicide. It was Rupert P's fake girlfriend who just HAPPENED to find the room the girls were staying in and just HAPPENED to swindled a key card out of the front desk and just HAPPENED to overhear the girls talking about Rupert P being tied up in their room so she snuck and in and quote en quote "killed him out of passion" by accident. What the actual fuck. Michelle, the fake girlfriend, was angry with Rupert P because he didn't book her a room in the hotel. BOOK IT YOURSELF LIKE WHAT THE FUCK HE ISN'T EVEN YOUR ACTUAL BOYFRIEND???? Want to hear the most fucked up part? She doesn't even go to jail in the end. You know who does? Rupert X and Rupert L, I mean they did throw a dead body off the top of the building which is incredibly fucked, but they didn't KILL him??? And the girls, they got off scot-free as well. And um what kind of police investigation was there??? Has no one ever heard of security cameras?? That would have shown the girls move the body everywhere? That would have shown Michelle go into the girls' room at the time of death? That would have shown absolutely everything??? There is no logic to anything that happens in the book. It's blatantly racist, sexist, homophobic, slut-shaming, suicide-joking mess of a book. There was so many opportunities to make this book great. Why couldn't the girls band together when they find the dead body? Why can't we see them trying to transport the body where there was no camera's? Through the vents or something? Why can't we see the girls make up and realise that the boy band is awful and that Rupert P didn't deserve to die? Why can't we see some justice for Michelle?
This book is disgusting, disturbing, poorly written and offensive.
I'm going to move on to the real turning point of the story, the point I thought would have made the book better. The girls return to the hotel room after roaming around for a bit to find Rupert P dead. I thought, finally yes the girls are going to be pushed to make some moral decisions and question their ethics, but instead, all they do is moan and whine. They dump Rupert P back into his penthouse hotel room with the other Rupert's, the girls have to hide in a cupboard as the other Ruperts just arrive back as well. And what do they do seeing their close friend and bandmate dead on a bean bag? Slut shame him and cry about how the band is going to break up now. Yup. I know. What in the actual fuck. The only Rupert that had any sense was Rupert K, who just happened to be Frances' favourite and also they kiss and have a little love story which is so fucked up on so many levels. You would think the story would end with the Rupert's calling the police and having a full on investigation but oh no instead Rupert X (side note, Barret Wilbert Weed, the person reading the audiobook, does not know how to pronounce Xavier and it is so frustrating) and Rupert K THROUGH RUPERT P OFF THE BUILDING TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE A SUICIDE EVEN THOUGH HE WAS STRANGLED TO DEATH AND IT'S VERY OBVIOUS AND WOULD SHOW UP IN THE AUTOPSY LIKE WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK????? Okay but let's talk about who actually murdered Rupert P, because it wasn't any of the girls and it wasn't any of the Ruperts and it wasn't suicide. It was Rupert P's fake girlfriend who just HAPPENED to find the room the girls were staying in and just HAPPENED to swindled a key card out of the front desk and just HAPPENED to overhear the girls talking about Rupert P being tied up in their room so she snuck and in and quote en quote "killed him out of passion" by accident. What the actual fuck. Michelle, the fake girlfriend, was angry with Rupert P because he didn't book her a room in the hotel. BOOK IT YOURSELF LIKE WHAT THE FUCK HE ISN'T EVEN YOUR ACTUAL BOYFRIEND???? Want to hear the most fucked up part? She doesn't even go to jail in the end. You know who does? Rupert X and Rupert L, I mean they did throw a dead body off the top of the building which is incredibly fucked, but they didn't KILL him??? And the girls, they got off scot-free as well. And um what kind of police investigation was there??? Has no one ever heard of security cameras?? That would have shown the girls move the body everywhere? That would have shown Michelle go into the girls' room at the time of death? That would have shown absolutely everything??? There is no logic to anything that happens in the book. It's blatantly racist, sexist, homophobic, slut-shaming, suicide-joking mess of a book. There was so many opportunities to make this book great. Why couldn't the girls band together when they find the dead body? Why can't we see them trying to transport the body where there was no camera's? Through the vents or something? Why can't we see the girls make up and realise that the boy band is awful and that Rupert P didn't deserve to die? Why can't we see some justice for Michelle?
This book is disgusting, disturbing, poorly written and offensive.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Racism, Sexism, Sexual assault, and Violence
Minor: Suicide