Reviews tagging 'War'

The Alchemyst by Michael Scott

2 reviews

corirarrick2's review against another edition

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adventurous mysterious tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.25


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oktuber's review

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adventurous informative slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

1.5

For a book trying to be a fast-paced, action/adventure story for (I assume) young teens, this was boring. It has such a great concept, and you can tell the author really did his research to try and flesh out the world building. The execution, however...

The biggest problem with this book is the massive amount of exposition. Scott heard about the advice of "show don't tell" and he decided to do the opposite. If a character is scary and imposing, we get told how scary and imposing they are. Instead of showing us who the characters are through their actions, we get told exactly who they are. For example:
"Don't say a word," Sophie warned her brother. Josh's quips and comments were always getting him into trouble. Whereas Sophie had the ability to see something and keep her mouth shut, her brother always had to make a comment or observation.
This happens on page 195, over halfway into the book. The worst part is, that we already know this! Previous scenes have shown Josh put his foot in his mouth, and yet Scott still felt that we needed to be explicitly told this. Halfway through the novel, we get an extended flashback sequence for the villain, John Dee. But there is only a brief scene in the flashback; the rest of it reads like a Wikipedia page on the character. And trust me, every character gets their Wikipedia page read at some point in the book.

That brings me to the second biggest problem: the repetition, especially of the exposition. Not only is it bad enough that we get fed every single detail, big parts of the plot and world building are explained time and time again. At the beginning of the book, the perspective often shifted between the villain and the protagonists. When
Spoilerthe Morrigan
Spoiler is introduced, she gets a detailed description of her character from both perspectives. The reader gets introduced to this character (through clunky exposition), twice. The series biggest element of world building,
Spoilerthe Elder Race and the Dark Elders,
Spoiler are introduced again and again and again and again throughout the novel. The worst instances of this particular repetition end at page 277. (The exposition after this is much more relevant to the plot, and therefore not as egregious an error.) 

The excessive exposition and repetition slow down what should be a fast paced book. It only picks up at around page 229. If the writing quality of the book before this point matched that of the writing quality before this point, the book would be an easy 3 stars, if not higher. The exposition that is there improves a lot, the characters are more well developed, the repetition mostly disappears. It is a much better book from this point on, but that doesn't save it from the slog of the earlier two thirds. 

The last point I want to make is that the two main characters, Sophie and Josh, are supposed to be fifteen and a half. The quotation from earlier is followed up with Josh saying "Don't tell me what to do." ...Is he a toddler? I don't expect the characters to be mature and well-spoken, especially not on the first book of a long series. But these characters are supposed to be sophomores in high school. At one point, they speculate that everything they had seen so far had been one big set up, a television show that was recording their reactions. Even for 2007, even for 2021, to think that the things that they had experienced were just special effects and prosthetics (what the twins think), is absurd. They then
Spoilertry to run away with absolutely no plan other than to hide in the desert in Utah, which apparently will protect them from magical creatures.
Spoiler

Maybe the writing improves immensely in the next few books. I'm not going to read them to find out. I honestly cannot recommend this book, not when there are other books that are doing the same concepts so much better, like Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials trilogy and Rick Riordan's entire bibliography. 

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