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tobyyy's review against another edition
1.0
This was a quick read. I was really hoping to like it, but did not (apparently a common feeling). Woman in STEM meets man in STEM, must choose between love and a life steeped in academia & research.
The main thing I feel that was done well in this book, was the detailing of life in a lab, cutthroat and unfair.
The research was interesting enough but not action-filled.
The romance, though? If it had been written well, I think this book would’ve been a 4 star for me. However, Aeden is a douche. I never got the sense that there was any spark of any type. The sex that was mentioned was cold and emotionless and there was one briefly detailed nonconsensual sex scene — which had me going “what??!” in anger & disbelief, since it really didn’t fit the narrative.
Yet Emily keeps on building a relationship with Aeden even after this point, and the nonconsensual sex is never brought up again. Again — “what??!!!”
Also, it’s hinted that Emily has autism but it’s treated as a taboo, shameful topic. I suppose in the ‘90s and early 2000s it was more taboo but my husband and I have a joke about how my family (who are all in academia except me) all has autistic traits BECAUSE of being in academia. Anyone who can so singlemindedly pursue and remain interested in such a narrow field has to have some autistic traits. And that’s not a bad thing. Having actual diagnosed autism isn’t a bad thing either. It just IS.
And as a mental health professional, reading about “shh autism some people just are meant to be alone shhh” — that makes me sad. My husband has autism and yes, sometimes things are difficult because of that (just like sometimes things are difficult because I’m an inherently stubborn person), but I wouldn’t trade our relationship for the world.
This book was written this year. Can we please have some kickass representation of autistic women in STEM that doesn’t pander to fearmongering, shame, and stigma? And also a romance featuring the above that doesn’t have a douchenugget dickwaffle for a love interest?!
The main thing I feel that was done well in this book, was the detailing of life in a lab, cutthroat and unfair.
The research was interesting enough but not action-filled.
The romance, though? If it had been written well, I think this book would’ve been a 4 star for me. However, Aeden is a douche. I never got the sense that there was any spark of any type. The sex that was mentioned was cold and emotionless and there was one briefly detailed nonconsensual sex scene — which had me going “what??!” in anger & disbelief, since it really didn’t fit the narrative.
Yet Emily keeps on building a relationship with Aeden even after this point, and the nonconsensual sex is never brought up again. Again — “what??!!!”
Also, it’s hinted that Emily has autism but it’s treated as a taboo, shameful topic. I suppose in the ‘90s and early 2000s it was more taboo but my husband and I have a joke about how my family (who are all in academia except me) all has autistic traits BECAUSE of being in academia. Anyone who can so singlemindedly pursue and remain interested in such a narrow field has to have some autistic traits. And that’s not a bad thing. Having actual diagnosed autism isn’t a bad thing either. It just IS.
And as a mental health professional, reading about “shh autism some people just are meant to be alone shhh” — that makes me sad. My husband has autism and yes, sometimes things are difficult because of that (just like sometimes things are difficult because I’m an inherently stubborn person), but I wouldn’t trade our relationship for the world.
This book was written this year. Can we please have some kickass representation of autistic women in STEM that doesn’t pander to fearmongering, shame, and stigma? And also a romance featuring the above that doesn’t have a douchenugget dickwaffle for a love interest?!
ellaada's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
spaidw's review against another edition
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
sandlynn's review against another edition
3.0
Andrea Rothman’s 2019 book The DNA of You and Me really made me think. While I can’t say I loved the book. I definitely tried to puzzle out what I thought of it and what the author might have intended.
First off, I want to say that The DNA of You and Me is not a romance, and it would be misleading to shelve it that way. It’s much more general or women’s fiction. It centers mostly on post doc Emily Apell’s research and her relationships in an academic lab at what I believe is Rockefeller University in New York. All her life, only child Emily has been a solitary person. Because of a bad reaction to the smell of cut grass as a child, she didn’t play outdoors with other children, kept herself apart, and spent many hours hanging out in her scientist father’s lab. As such, she became fascinated and then driven by science, especially research into how smell works — and doesn’t work — in the human brain. As a postdoc, she gains a position in a lab of a scientist she admires. Unfortunately, the scientist leading the lab is not what he’s cracked up to be and his lab more or less is a toxic workplace. Emily, a loner all her life, finds herself being pitted against two colleagues, Aeden and Allegra, who are working together on the same type of research she is. This doesn’t endear her to them, but that doesn’t prevent her from developing an attraction to Aeden. Ultimately, Emily’s research proves more promising and through some subterfuge and maneuvering, she manages to get Aeden on her team, which forces Allegra out of the lab. Thus begins a relationship that starts out on a somewhat unhealthy note, leaving the reader guessing whether these two people will manage to right their relationship, how Emily’s research will be impacted, and how the lab chief’s, Justin’s, ambitions will hinder both the professional and personal lives of those he manages.
One can’t read this book without reflecting on how women have been and are impacted in their professional pursuits — in this case scientific research — and have often been asked to make false choices. Emily is a very driven scientist, who is socially awkward, but she also has desires to connect with others, with someone. That desire isn’t helped by professional prejudices and toxic work environments that influence not only Emily’s choices but also Aeden’s. Whether the two of them could’ve formed a better relationship had they been in a healthier workplace is something the reader might ponder. But clearly, the unsatisfying start of their personal relationship and the choices Emily and Aeden both make, affecting each other’s work and ambitions, leaves you wondering if they were ever right for each other or whether their personal failings could be balanced out by the other’s. I found it interesting that, of the two women who were Emily’s cohorts in the lab, both ended up leaving the lab and, I believe the scientific profession totally. Years later, in Emily’s own lab, we meet a young female post doc who is not only doing successful research, but is married and pregnant. Is that because “times have changed” or is Emily’s lab — a lab run by a woman — far less toxic or both?
In any event, it does leave the reader with a cloud of depression over how both genders — but especially women — ended up feeling like they had to make choices pitting the personal and professional that were totally unnecessary.
Despite the sliver of hope at the end of the book, this story just made me sad. Emily was a success but she was left feeling that she couldn’t have a life outside of her work or meaningfully share it with anyone, and she never comes to a conclusion as to whether that’s “unique” to her or part and parcel of the discriminatory world she grew up in.
Leaving aside all these personal situations, the story focuses heavily on Emily’s research and the scientific process, two things I know little about. Although it was interesting to read, as an animal lover, I was turned off by the need to breed and kill mice in order to do their work.
Altogether, Rothman’s book left me a bit down. Usually, when I read a story about a woman who makes big accomplishments, I feel happy for her and rejoice in her success, but this book made it feel like an empty accomplishment, especially since we never see Emily celebrate with anyone or even see her receiving the honor she was being bestowed. I wish this was more satisfying. I’d give the book a C/B-.
First off, I want to say that The DNA of You and Me is not a romance, and it would be misleading to shelve it that way. It’s much more general or women’s fiction. It centers mostly on post doc Emily Apell’s research and her relationships in an academic lab at what I believe is Rockefeller University in New York. All her life, only child Emily has been a solitary person. Because of a bad reaction to the smell of cut grass as a child, she didn’t play outdoors with other children, kept herself apart, and spent many hours hanging out in her scientist father’s lab. As such, she became fascinated and then driven by science, especially research into how smell works — and doesn’t work — in the human brain. As a postdoc, she gains a position in a lab of a scientist she admires. Unfortunately, the scientist leading the lab is not what he’s cracked up to be and his lab more or less is a toxic workplace. Emily, a loner all her life, finds herself being pitted against two colleagues, Aeden and Allegra, who are working together on the same type of research she is. This doesn’t endear her to them, but that doesn’t prevent her from developing an attraction to Aeden. Ultimately, Emily’s research proves more promising and through some subterfuge and maneuvering, she manages to get Aeden on her team, which forces Allegra out of the lab. Thus begins a relationship that starts out on a somewhat unhealthy note, leaving the reader guessing whether these two people will manage to right their relationship, how Emily’s research will be impacted, and how the lab chief’s, Justin’s, ambitions will hinder both the professional and personal lives of those he manages.
One can’t read this book without reflecting on how women have been and are impacted in their professional pursuits — in this case scientific research — and have often been asked to make false choices. Emily is a very driven scientist, who is socially awkward, but she also has desires to connect with others, with someone. That desire isn’t helped by professional prejudices and toxic work environments that influence not only Emily’s choices but also Aeden’s. Whether the two of them could’ve formed a better relationship had they been in a healthier workplace is something the reader might ponder. But clearly, the unsatisfying start of their personal relationship and the choices Emily and Aeden both make, affecting each other’s work and ambitions, leaves you wondering if they were ever right for each other or whether their personal failings could be balanced out by the other’s. I found it interesting that, of the two women who were Emily’s cohorts in the lab, both ended up leaving the lab and, I believe the scientific profession totally. Years later, in Emily’s own lab, we meet a young female post doc who is not only doing successful research, but is married and pregnant. Is that because “times have changed” or is Emily’s lab — a lab run by a woman — far less toxic or both?
In any event, it does leave the reader with a cloud of depression over how both genders — but especially women — ended up feeling like they had to make choices pitting the personal and professional that were totally unnecessary.
Despite the sliver of hope at the end of the book, this story just made me sad. Emily was a success but she was left feeling that she couldn’t have a life outside of her work or meaningfully share it with anyone, and she never comes to a conclusion as to whether that’s “unique” to her or part and parcel of the discriminatory world she grew up in.
Leaving aside all these personal situations, the story focuses heavily on Emily’s research and the scientific process, two things I know little about. Although it was interesting to read, as an animal lover, I was turned off by the need to breed and kill mice in order to do their work.
Altogether, Rothman’s book left me a bit down. Usually, when I read a story about a woman who makes big accomplishments, I feel happy for her and rejoice in her success, but this book made it feel like an empty accomplishment, especially since we never see Emily celebrate with anyone or even see her receiving the honor she was being bestowed. I wish this was more satisfying. I’d give the book a C/B-.
woolardhe's review against another edition
2.0
I read this book last year, and reading the love hypothesis made me remember this - this man FALSIFIED her data and WHAT? That in itself was so angering. I didn’t like this book.
ang44's review against another edition
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
The love story in this honestly kinda sucks. The science aspect is a bit interesting but it’s hard to distinguish which aspects of the scientific discoveries were created for the fictional story and which aspects are real. The decisions of the main character are boring and a bit misogynistic at times, and the love interest is dreadfully unlikeable.
ellbelle's review against another edition
1.0
God, this book was awful. I am embarrassed I even bothered to finish it.
I certainly would not call the "romance" in this book a romance at all. It was entirely unclear and under-developed how and why Emily developed feelings for Aeden. Up until the point they started having sex, and for a while after, they had a completely antagonistic relationship with one another.
Their relationship even began in a negative way, with one of their early sexual encounters not being consensual. This somewhat epitomizes their relationship, which seemed entirely toxic.
The DNA research aspect was intriguing, but the way it was developed in the story was not interesting at all.
I would highly recommend never reading this book.
I certainly would not call the "romance" in this book a romance at all. It was entirely unclear and under-developed how and why Emily developed feelings for Aeden. Up until the point they started having sex, and for a while after, they had a completely antagonistic relationship with one another.
Their relationship even began in a negative way, with one of their early sexual encounters not being consensual. This somewhat epitomizes their relationship, which seemed entirely toxic.
The DNA research aspect was intriguing, but the way it was developed in the story was not interesting at all.
I would highly recommend never reading this book.
starrydreams's review against another edition
dark
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
shugentobler's review against another edition
2.0
I was a little disappointed by this novel. It glazed over abusive advisor/mentee relationships and the protagonist was more self deprecating than I would like. It's problematic to me as many have mentioned that there is some sex that is not consensual- but rarely do people bring up the strange scenes with her advisor! It's unclear if he is sexually harassing her and he is clearly pushing for more work than is reasonable, painting an unhealthy academic picture. I had high hopes and they were dashed.
caroline_books's review against another edition
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.5
Liked how there was science involved but absolutely hated the ending.