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yleavy's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.75
Graphic: Body shaming, Deadnaming, Drug use, Eating disorder, Transphobia, Vomit, and Dysphoria
Moderate: Body shaming, Cursing, Death, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, Self harm, Sexual content, Grief, Car accident, Death of parent, and Alcohol
Minor: Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, Medical content, Classism, and Pandemic/Epidemic
imlfox's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Graphic: Death, Mental illness, Grief, and Car accident
Moderate: Drug use, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia, and Death of parent
Minor: Deadnaming
junoversum's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I liked a lot that the novel includes perspectives from both Ming and Tom, although I have to admit that I did not care much about Tom's perspective. I found him quite boring and struggled to remember why he was supposed to be a loveable character (?), but I liked the portrayal of his relationship with Rob, the physical closeness and tenderness they shared. But I hate that he was never held accountable for his transphobic behaviour in his relationship with Ming. Overall, I could not shake the feeling that Tom's perspective and Ming's isolation were both part of an attempt to make (her) transness palatable for cis people.
Additionally, I am very irritated at this novel's approach to eating disorder and body issues. To me it felt like they were thrown into the mix of topics quite carelessly. The explicit descriptions of Cass's eating disorder were used mainly to highlight issues in her relationship with Rob and her dysfunctional dynamic with Ming. This is a very dangerous and shallow approach to how eating disorders work. Ming's (partly dysphoric) body issues and corresponding eating disorder were also mentioned only once. At no point was anyone showing deeper concern than a slight worry (and in Tom's case: disgust) and it was never mentioned that people with eating disorders can and should accept help in dealing with them, rather than waiting for them to diminish or disappear. This is especially irritating to me as food, the enjyoment of cooking and eating were extensively described throughout the book, which seems contradictory.
Graphic: Deadnaming, Eating disorder, and Transphobia
Moderate: Death
e11en's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Graphic: Deadnaming, Drug use, Mental illness, Transphobia, Grief, and Dysphoria
Moderate: Eating disorder, Car accident, and Death of parent
shortstackz's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Ming's character development across the whole book brings me so much joy for her, as she navigates her gender identity and finds her playwriter voice. I loved the added characterization of Ming being an immigrant from a country that would deny her existence, and discusses the very real inability to return to her home country (Malaysia) as herself. Ming brings up a lot of logistics of being a trans person, particularly a trans immigrant, that many cis-people (myself included) have had the privilege to not notice.
In contrast we also see Tom's perspective, which I think is really valuable to see how a cis-partner might cope with their partner transitioning during the relationship. Tom identifies as a gay man, and that complicates his relationship with Ming when she begins to transition. I found sitting in Tom's head really interesting to see how he navigates his love for Ming, and his attraction towards masculine features.
Ming and Tom love each other so much, and the bittersweet journey through Ming's transition is so beautifully complicated and heart-wrenching. At no point did I think either character wanted to deny Ming her gender identity, but love is more complicated than gender alone.
Graphic: Dysphoria
Moderate: Deadnaming and Death of parent
Minor: Deportation
ukponge's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.0
Graphic: Deadnaming, Death, Transphobia, and Death of parent
mingle_jingle's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
3.0
It was thoughtful, sad, honest and poignant in so many aspects of the storyline and character development.
Although this book wasn't my cup of tea, I can see myself recommending this book to others - younger queer folks or parents of queer community members - to get an honest insight into the lives & loves of younger queer people. In this book, I particularly liked the representation of the family members of the two main protagonists.
Moderate: Deadnaming, Death, Eating disorder, Transphobia, and Death of parent
innae's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I have not read a lot of novels with queer characters, and none with a trans main character. I am glad this was my first one, because it is just so dang beautiful. It is more and less than a love story. It’s a story of friendship and transformations. Of learning about yourself. I really came to love Tom and Ming.
The POV switches between Tom and Ming throughout the novel. And while the changes take place at chapters, sometimes it took a bit before I knew who was voicing the chapter. This bothered me more at the beginning, and that was when the pacing also seemed a little slow. Just stick with it, the story unfolds and it is worth it.
Moderate: Death
Minor: Deadnaming and Sexual content
evfav's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Graphic: Deadnaming, Death, Drug use, Eating disorder, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Xenophobia, Grief, Car accident, Death of parent, Alcohol, and Dysphoria
Minor: Terminal illness