yourfriendtorie's review against another edition
1.0
Almost as boring as the Andy Warhol diaries, just more neurotic in its self-analysis. Add Sex and the City references and tedious descriptions of a privileged yuppie lifestyle, and I am officially left cold. My initial interest in this book was based on the subtitle: "Choosing Motherhood After a Lifetime of Ambivalence," but I had to double check the definition of "ambivalence" when, on the very first page, Walker claims that she's wanted to have a baby since she was a teenager. I guess this is where I stopped being able to relate. I'm not sure why I kept reading.
mrsthrift's review against another edition
4.0
2007, baby, babies, becoming a mom, feminist, third wave, motherhood, parenting, parenthood, pregnancy, birth, birthing, tenzin, Buddhism, biracial, memoir, ambivalence
emilylandry's review against another edition
4.0
This book gave me a lot to think about: the relationships of mothers to their children; operating as part of a family; buddhism; Western vs. Alternative health care. Also, I just really enjoyed it. If you like to read about pregnancy and babies (ahem, ALEX), this book serves up a lot of that.
madfoot's review against another edition
3.0
I found this book to be a bit devastating, and months after finishing it I'm still not sure how I feel about it. I was one of Alice Walker's legion of fangirls, back in the day, and still felt fond of her work when I picked Rebecca Walker's two memoirs up. The first made me feel a bit sick; this finished the job. As self-absorbed as Rebecca can be, I still appreciated the many feelings, of both power and vulnerability, that she described. (didn't hurt that I was pregnant at the time, I'm sure). I really identified with her, and especially appreciated her rueful realization that the serene, natural childbirth she'd wished for was just not in the cards for her. All this made her mom's distancing and cruelty all the more painful. Of course I know there are two sides to every story, and this did read a bit like it should be titled "hippie dearest," but I still feel a bit like I just found out there's no tooth fairy.
asimoni's review against another edition
3.0
I would have liked this book more if there was less about the copious amounts of food Rebecca Walker consumed while pregnant and the seeming perfection of the father of her baby. At times I also felt like an uncomfortable voyeur on the tense dynamics between mother - Alice Walker - and daughter. All that aside, she offers interesting and thought-provoking insights into why it is that so many of us (20-30 something women) feel ambivalence (or fear) of motherhood. And she questions the empowerment that feminism has engendered - suggesting that today it manifests as troubling alienation from ourselves and from others. In sum, this book is worth the read.
orangejenny's review against another edition
2.0
Despite the subtitle, Walker has little to say about ambivalence; she's clear about having desired motherhood for many years. The most interesting moments of the book are the depictions of her relationship with her own mother, but there's little detail there. It's hard to blame her for wanting to keep some privacy, but that leaves the book as a rather forgettable pregnancy memoir, one that unfortunately flirts with the idea that experiencing pregnancy makes one a superior human being.
hyzenthlay76's review against another edition
3.0
This is really more like 2.5 stars, because while it was thought-provoking at times, it was also incredibly annoying. Major Annoyance #1 is that the "ambivalent" author tells us she has been obsessing about having a baby for 10-15 years. I don't think that word means what you think it means...
Major Annoyance #2 is that the blurbs promised an exploration of the transformation from daughter to mother, and yet Walker and her mother aren't speaking for most of the book and by the end have written each other off. That seems a more dramatic transition than most and left little to explore.
Major Annoyance #3 is that the birth of her son gives Walker the predictable license to say that until a woman has a baby, she isn't fully living or fully loving. Go feminism.
In between the annoyances was my usual fascination with pregnancy and childbirth, things I will, without ambivalence, never experience.
Major Annoyance #2 is that the blurbs promised an exploration of the transformation from daughter to mother, and yet Walker and her mother aren't speaking for most of the book and by the end have written each other off. That seems a more dramatic transition than most and left little to explore.
Major Annoyance #3 is that the birth of her son gives Walker the predictable license to say that until a woman has a baby, she isn't fully living or fully loving. Go feminism.
In between the annoyances was my usual fascination with pregnancy and childbirth, things I will, without ambivalence, never experience.
bpaul's review against another edition
1.0
I had to stop on page 69. "I don't care how close you are to your adopted son or beloved stepdaughter, the love you have for your nonbiological child isn't the same as the love you have for your own flesh and blood."
I agree with the other reviews that the subtitle is misleading. I kept waiting for the reconciling of how the author chose motherhood after internally debating the choice. That discussion didn't appear. Instead, the author gushes about how much she always wanted to be a mom. Those of us who have had that internal debate of "should I parent or not?" can acknowledge that motherhood and love come in many forms. Comparing the familial love between biological, adopted and step families is not a helpful or productive argument for people trying to figure out how to build their families.
I agree with the other reviews that the subtitle is misleading. I kept waiting for the reconciling of how the author chose motherhood after internally debating the choice. That discussion didn't appear. Instead, the author gushes about how much she always wanted to be a mom. Those of us who have had that internal debate of "should I parent or not?" can acknowledge that motherhood and love come in many forms. Comparing the familial love between biological, adopted and step families is not a helpful or productive argument for people trying to figure out how to build their families.