liralen's review against another edition
4.0
The subtitle of the book is A Journey, and Mockett's journey is a complicated one. Half Japanese by birth, she never forgets—or lets the reader forget—that she was also born and raised American. With family in Japan, though, and her grandfather's bones to bury, she sets out in the wake of the 2011 earthquake to better understand Buddhism and grief and Japan's peacefully co-existing contradictions.
I read this for class, and it's easily my favourite book of the semester. There aren't easy answers, not least because there aren't easy questions, but Mockett takes to her exploration with a great deal of self-awareness and humour. She talks grief and depression but doesn't let the book get mired in it; rather, she asks more questions and pieces together more parts of a culture that does not quite let her claim it. An older man who was also visiting Aizu watched me as I carried on to my mother. He gave me a tolerant and compassionate smile. "I'm so sorry you are upset," he said. "But you don't understand. You aren't Japanese" (8).
This sense of being an outsider, though, is complicated by Mockett speaking Japanese and having Japanese family and otherwise understanding far more about Japan than your average Westerner. She is reminded that she is not Japanese, but also invited to see and do things that non-Japanese-speaking Westerners are not; there are conversations from which she must tease meaning, but she has the context with which to do so.
If it sounds like I'm skimming over huge parts of the book—grief! the tsunami! Buddhism!—well, I am, but it's not because they're not important. We haven't discussed this in class yet, but I'm very much looking forward to what others pick up on as standout themes.
I read this for class, and it's easily my favourite book of the semester. There aren't easy answers, not least because there aren't easy questions, but Mockett takes to her exploration with a great deal of self-awareness and humour. She talks grief and depression but doesn't let the book get mired in it; rather, she asks more questions and pieces together more parts of a culture that does not quite let her claim it. An older man who was also visiting Aizu watched me as I carried on to my mother. He gave me a tolerant and compassionate smile. "I'm so sorry you are upset," he said. "But you don't understand. You aren't Japanese" (8).
This sense of being an outsider, though, is complicated by Mockett speaking Japanese and having Japanese family and otherwise understanding far more about Japan than your average Westerner. She is reminded that she is not Japanese, but also invited to see and do things that non-Japanese-speaking Westerners are not; there are conversations from which she must tease meaning, but she has the context with which to do so.
If it sounds like I'm skimming over huge parts of the book—grief! the tsunami! Buddhism!—well, I am, but it's not because they're not important. We haven't discussed this in class yet, but I'm very much looking forward to what others pick up on as standout themes.
silodear's review against another edition
4.0
I really enjoyed this glimpse into ways of grieving, especially in the context of the 3/11 tsunami and earthquake in Japan. I like this authors style and appreciated her approach. I would have liked more focus on the tsunami/earthquake and the traumatic grief that it caused, but I still liked the gentler inquiry interwoven with the authors own experiences with death. Recommended.
darlingmud's review against another edition
5.0
One of the most interesting and wonderful books I've ever read. Honestly can't recommend it enough.
alysonimagines's review
5.0
As a biracial American with Japanese heritage, I really appreciate the rare in-depth insight into Japanese culture that Marie Mutsuki Mockett's memoir offers, since I have grown up mostly in the United States and am painfully aware of my own knowledge gap. It's an account not only of Mockett's geographic journey across Japan after the Fukushima nuclear disaster but also of a spiritual journey in which she explores the many rituals of death and grieving to be found in various Buddhist sects, Shintoism, and other Japanese cultural traditions as a way of coming to terms with her own grief over her American father's death. Says Mockett, "If you are a Westerner and you spend enough time in Japan—and you speak Japanese—you will eventually be told that you cannot truly understand the Japanese. Only the Japanese can understand themselves." Yet having a Japanese mother who took her to Japan many times as a child to visit the family's Buddhist temple, and having sufficient fluency in the language to converse with the Japanese on many aspects of their culture and history, Mockett is more qualified than the average Westerner to observe what makes the Japanese a truly unique people. Her observations are beautifully articulate and enable me to appreciate Japan in greater depth than I could have reached from my own limited experience.
skyturtles's review against another edition
5.0
My interests have intersected; how can I not love this book? Buddhism meets biography meets Japan meets tradition meets linguistics meets spirituality meets supernatural. I also recommend to you "Ghost of the Tsunami" by Richard Lloyd Parry, who brings a more in-depth journalistic take to the ante-mortem phenomena that the author presents here, which is not to say that her personal experiences and family connections are not of importance. I highly recommend reading both; together, I have so much more awareness of the impact of the March 11, 2011 earthquake and tsunami.
ernibidin's review
5.0
Halfway through the book, I found that it is a fascinating read about the nature of zen and buddhism in the Japanese culture, especially when dealing with grief and loss, as seen with the aftermath of the tsunami. I've never read anything on Buddhism before and this book gives a comprehensive understanding in the matter. I admire the Japanese on having a remarkable attitude and respond towards the tragedy.
Some parts of the book are quite touching, especially the stories about the lost souls after the tsunami. The author's grief for her father and her grandfather's death mirrors my own, maybe that's why I think this book is very relatable to me. And in my books, it rates high up there with my favourites. This book deserves five stars, and is one of the best books I've read in 2015.
Lastly, this is my favourite quote from the book:
I am, after all, just one person on a planet of millions, all of whom, if they have not already, will also suffer the same intense feelings of shock and loss that I have, and many of whom will do so in far more traumatic settings. MY LITTLE LANTERN OF GRIEF WAS BUT ONE IN A SEA OF OTHER LANTERNS.
Everybody will experience the feeling of losing someone they love, and we will try in our different ways to cope with it. For the Japanese, their gods and their fascinating culture in a way, will help them. And for the rest of us, we have our own beliefs, traditions, or religions to help us cope. All in all, I am truly happy that I found this book by accident and have the pleasure to read it.
Some parts of the book are quite touching, especially the stories about the lost souls after the tsunami. The author's grief for her father and her grandfather's death mirrors my own, maybe that's why I think this book is very relatable to me. And in my books, it rates high up there with my favourites. This book deserves five stars, and is one of the best books I've read in 2015.
Lastly, this is my favourite quote from the book:
I am, after all, just one person on a planet of millions, all of whom, if they have not already, will also suffer the same intense feelings of shock and loss that I have, and many of whom will do so in far more traumatic settings. MY LITTLE LANTERN OF GRIEF WAS BUT ONE IN A SEA OF OTHER LANTERNS.
Everybody will experience the feeling of losing someone they love, and we will try in our different ways to cope with it. For the Japanese, their gods and their fascinating culture in a way, will help them. And for the rest of us, we have our own beliefs, traditions, or religions to help us cope. All in all, I am truly happy that I found this book by accident and have the pleasure to read it.
rsosolen's review
5.0
'Where the Dead Pause, and the Japanese Say Goodbye' is a book anyone who is moving through grief themselves, or curious about Japanese culture, should read. Marie Mutsuki Mockett takes you on her personal journey of moving through, not only the crippling grief of losing her father, but the confusion and pain of the 2011 tsunami that devastated a country she considers one of her homes.
As a woman who is half Japanese she always felt deeply connected to Japan at the same time as feeling like a bit of an outsider. In this book she goes on an extended journey across Japan first visiting her family's temple, which is only 55 miles away from the nuclear meltdown. She explores the ruins of the tsunami, and takes to the survivors, the priests who are helping, and then sets out on her own personal spiritual and cultural journey to explore how the Japanese mourn, and how she herself can come to terms with her own grief.
This book is part travel guide, part history lesson, and part personal memoir--but that does not do it justice.
Reading Marie Mustuki Mockett's words was like talking to an old friend. It was as if her words took me gently by the hand and walked me through this magical journey of trying to understand the magic of another culture, the truth about death, and the way through ones grief.
As a woman who is half Japanese she always felt deeply connected to Japan at the same time as feeling like a bit of an outsider. In this book she goes on an extended journey across Japan first visiting her family's temple, which is only 55 miles away from the nuclear meltdown. She explores the ruins of the tsunami, and takes to the survivors, the priests who are helping, and then sets out on her own personal spiritual and cultural journey to explore how the Japanese mourn, and how she herself can come to terms with her own grief.
This book is part travel guide, part history lesson, and part personal memoir--but that does not do it justice.
Reading Marie Mustuki Mockett's words was like talking to an old friend. It was as if her words took me gently by the hand and walked me through this magical journey of trying to understand the magic of another culture, the truth about death, and the way through ones grief.
holtkaren's review against another edition
4.0
cross cultural study and meditation on death and memories. extremely interesting and educational
nce14210's review
3.0
A touching look at Japanese ways of dealing with grief. Fascinating. Not much about the tsunami, more about living with loss. I loved her look at the seasons as she grieved for family members. A very interesting look at just one small aspect of Japanese culture.