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pattydsf's review against another edition
3.0
"Think about it for a moment. It is truly very odd.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.
…We live in a society which sees high self-esteem as a proof of well-being, but we do not want to be intimate with this admirable and desirable person.
We see moral and social conventions as inhibitions on our personal freedoms, and yet we are frightened of anyone who goes away from the crowd and develops ‘eccentric’ habits.
…We think we are unique, special and deserving of happiness, but we are terrified of being alone.” p. 20
I don’t have much trouble being alone. I have more trouble with wanting to be alone (shades of Garbo) when others want me to be with them. So much of this small book is not aimed at me.
However, I had two reasons for reading this. First of all, I really like Maitland’s writings. She was one of the first authors that I read that showed me that Christianity and feminism might be able to be integral to my life. I still revisit the essays that she edited on Christian feminism decades ago.
Also I wanted to read one of Picador’s School of Life. Maybe it isn’t fair to start with an author I like, but I was curious about how these books worked. If Maitland’s is a good example, they are short reads about interesting topics that may lead you to other books on the subject. Sometimes all you need is a short intro to a subject you know nothing about.
I can’t say that I learned anything new about being alone. Many of Maitland’s suggestions are things I already do. For example, she suggests that the reader find ways to be solitary. I am a handweaver. This is not a hobby that you do with lots of other people. I spend time with other weavers, but not when I am actually at my loom.
Since I have been reading about solitude and silence, I am grateful to Maitland for suggesting some books to add to my reading list. I have plenty to read, but this subject seems to be a project of mine. There are five to six books already on my TBR pile about either silence or solitude.
If you are curious about why someone would choose to be alone – pick this up. If you have read Maitland’s book about silence and want to know why she needed to write about both silence and aloneness, you should find this.
trippalli's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
relaxing
slow-paced
4.75
Excellent reflection of the joys of being alone; the variety of experiences we do alone and ways to try new experiences alone.. Many philosophical reflections, historical examples and inspirations. Excellent.
koberreads's review against another edition
informative
reflective
slow-paced
4.25
Read the #Blinkistversiononly
Want to buy and read the whole book? - No, blinkist is enough
Want to buy and read the whole book? - No, blinkist is enough
nithou's review against another edition
4.0
Quite an interesting take on something we all forgot in this century. I really liked and learned quite a thing or two from this book, and it made me want to get out of my comfort zone and try to spend some alone time. Still I was expecting a bit more but can't tell exactly what.
barrettcmyk's review against another edition
2.0
Picked this one up at the library -- it was sitting at the checkout counter when I got there, and since I already had "how to be happy" (which was excellent,
go read it) in my hands, I guess I figured this dovetailed in some way. Worst case, I hoped this might help me find some new ways to carve out alone time (driving down the toll road doesn't count thanks) and maybe be a bit more... Centered? Clearer?
Anyhow. Maitland is a woman who, after living a good portion of her life surrounded by a large group of family and friends, decided to move to a very very rural area of Scotland. As in, 20 minutes to the nearest shop, rural. In the book she partially talks about why she chose the lifestyle, but mostly she's making a case for why we shouldn't fear solitude, as a society. She does a brief whiz through history and famous loners (secular and religious), which is interesting. Moreso is the point she raises about our contradictory views on aloneness: how can we fear doing things alone or being alone, or have negative connotations with aloneness... While at the same time champion independence? Or the creativity that often comes from solitude?
Maitland offers up a few little nuggets on how to be alone (spoiler: take small steps), but mostly the book aims to confront the perception that being alone is somehow a bad thing. Nothing earth shattering here, but an interesting idea in itself.
go read it) in my hands, I guess I figured this dovetailed in some way. Worst case, I hoped this might help me find some new ways to carve out alone time (driving down the toll road doesn't count thanks) and maybe be a bit more... Centered? Clearer?
Anyhow. Maitland is a woman who, after living a good portion of her life surrounded by a large group of family and friends, decided to move to a very very rural area of Scotland. As in, 20 minutes to the nearest shop, rural. In the book she partially talks about why she chose the lifestyle, but mostly she's making a case for why we shouldn't fear solitude, as a society. She does a brief whiz through history and famous loners (secular and religious), which is interesting. Moreso is the point she raises about our contradictory views on aloneness: how can we fear doing things alone or being alone, or have negative connotations with aloneness... While at the same time champion independence? Or the creativity that often comes from solitude?
Maitland offers up a few little nuggets on how to be alone (spoiler: take small steps), but mostly the book aims to confront the perception that being alone is somehow a bad thing. Nothing earth shattering here, but an interesting idea in itself.
readingfarandwide's review against another edition
4.0
This book was very useful, but I agree with the other reviewers who said that the author was trying too hard to convince us readers that being alone is a good thing. I didn't mind that so much because I was on the fence for such a long time about this question and I did need a little bit of extra convincing. However, this book is really more of an introduction to the topic rather than an in-depth guide that I was hoping for. She spends much of the book defending her preference of living alone instead of giving useful insights into the solitary lifestyle. I must note that the bibliography at the end of the book and the 'homework' section is excellent! All in all, I think anyone who is interested in the topic should read this book as it is a great introduction, but you will enjoy it only if your expectations are not too high and you don't expect that this book changes your life.
mmcintyre17's review against another edition
4.0
Intriguing introduction to the theme of solitude and why it is so often stigmatized in modern society. Maitland also provides a list of further resources for self-study. I found it comforting and inspiring in such a time as this.