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All about ADHD: A Family Resource for Helping Your Child Succeed with ADHD by Thomas W. Phelan
fairislemeadow's review against another edition
1.0
Read about half and skimmed the rest; I didn't like the author's unnecessarily negative tone. Although he made a point to mention that ADHD is not the parents' fault, he still resorted to a lot of parent-blaming and parent-shaming language.
He'd frequently compare PI kids to C kids, referring to the former as sweet but flighty and the latter basically as terrors. I get how hard it is (my child has both ASD and ADHD-C); but again, his tone and language really rubbed me the wrong way. At one point he said "these children can be problems to themselves and others;" really?! There wasn't a single better way he could word that?
The part of the book that would have been most helpful, the behavior management section, was disappointingly brief and mostly referred the reader to his other book, 1-2-3 Magic. Also, the comorbidities section did not mention autism, which is a HUGE comorbidity with ADHD.
He'd frequently compare PI kids to C kids, referring to the former as sweet but flighty and the latter basically as terrors. I get how hard it is (my child has both ASD and ADHD-C); but again, his tone and language really rubbed me the wrong way. At one point he said "these children can be problems to themselves and others;" really?! There wasn't a single better way he could word that?
The part of the book that would have been most helpful, the behavior management section, was disappointingly brief and mostly referred the reader to his other book, 1-2-3 Magic. Also, the comorbidities section did not mention autism, which is a HUGE comorbidity with ADHD.
sara_reads_things's review against another edition
3.0
As a mother of a son with ADHD, I am familiar with the day to day struggles that kids with this difference face. We've been dealing with it for many years and will keep dealing with it for the rest of my son's life. For a lot of families that have children with ADHD, they don't have a lot of time on their hands to read endless books about this disorder. This book was so full of heavy material that I felt bogged down and had a hard time getting to the stuff that I really wanted to learn. I'm sure all the scientific chapters would benefit someone who is just starting to research about ADHD, but I found that it just went on and on about things that I already knew. Maybe if this book was a little more lighthearted and upbeat, it would have been a great read for me.
Received an advance reader copy in exchange for a fair review.
Received an advance reader copy in exchange for a fair review.
canada_matt's review against another edition
challenging
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
Living in a household full of ADHD, I have long suffered through a misunderstanding or lack of being able to effectively deal with the diagnosis. While I peer in at the rest of the family unit, I am unable to fully comprehend the hurdles or put myself in a proper mindset to understand how people think and act, to cater to what they need to progress effectively. An exploration of some of the literature out there proved even more daunting, which led me to look for something that was both reputable and catered for the layperson, so I could bridge the divide. I discovered this piece by Dr. Thomas W. Phelan, PhD., which has helped a great deal.
There is no doubt that the struggle is real for all involved, but there is a significant need to understand the child with ADHD to be able to effectively parent them. Determining the struggles and when they manifest is key to being able to effectively control the situation, as I have come to discover over the last decade with my own son. To see things from their perspective without treating them as a pariah, deem them ‘ever-forgetful’ or even as ‘broken’ will help to work with them, rather than clash for the foreseeable future.
That ADHD is usually paired with other diagnoses helps to see some of the differing characteristics that tend to appear with young people. Oppositional Defiance Disorder is a major one, though anxiety is also high on the list. That these can be co-morbid diagnoses helps to see the child through a lens of not being ‘impaired on multiple levels’, but rather in need of additional guidance, as there is more at play. Phelan makes this come together and provides a stunning clarity for many of the issues that come to the surface.
ADHD is not meant to single the child out, though they tend to feel that. It may be a social and academic hurdle, but it need not be an impairment or something that leaves them feeling in constant struggle at home and worrying about how it will manifest at school. Dealing with it, both through medication and some basic strategies, can help tackle the issues head-on, providing alternatives for success, rather than isolating and painting a target on their back. This is key for the child who feels negatively flagged is sure to play on these insecurities and act out in other destructive ways.
Phelan makes sure to add a few chapters about how parents and teachers. can handle the ADHD child in social or scholastic settings without creating the ‘neon sign’ to differentiate them from their peers. While it is impossible to hide all symptoms and the needed for assistance, not exacerbating it will help create a fluidity and calmness needed to handle things when they arise.
While there is so much that I took away from the book, perhaps the most important part is to understand that this is not a death sentence, nor does it have to be an emotional or intellectual time bomb for families. It is through compassion and understanding that the diagnoses can be comprehended, allowing for a better understanding of symptoms and strategies to help overcome some of the most daunting aspects of ADHD. While I will never be able to fully envelop the struggles, I will now have a stronger understanding of how to approach the ADHD mind and thought processes. Phelan helps to bring some sense to a complex diagnosis with easy to understand theories, tactics for success, and means of offering support. Each chapter appears to make things flow well and the overall theme is not lost at any point. While no two children are exactly alike, I can see parallels between them and will be able to apply many of the techniques across the board without further isolating any of the children or my co-parent. It is here that things will flourish for me, as I continue on my journey to better understand what is going on.
Kudos, Dr. Phelan, for helping to make this mountain a little less scary, though i know I have a lot of climbing to do.
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felinity's review
5.0
A clearly written and comprehensive (but not incomprehensible) overview of ADHD, including sections for adults with ADHD, for parents, and for teachers, each offering balanced advice based on studies and research. It's well footnoted too, so you can follow up on anything pertinent or interesting.
I kept itching to mark relevant sections, restraining myself because it was a library book, so I'm adding it to my "buy" list!
I kept itching to mark relevant sections, restraining myself because it was a library book, so I'm adding it to my "buy" list!