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david_slack110507's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
mysterious
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I read this book for my A-Level English Literature coursework (as well as reading Wide Sargasso Sea for the coursework element of the course as well) and so I spent the majority of the summer putting nearly all of my reading motivation and progress into reading this book as well as annotating it and tabbing it which is much more than what I do for the other books I read and so hopefully explains the extra long time that the book took for me to read it especially because it is much shorter than my normal books.
In deeply analysing it, I feel like I have only enjoyed the book more because I really like this novel and that's quite shocking because while there is an initial plot of Lydia dying and the family trying to figure out how she died and once learning it was suicide, trying to figure out what drove her to that point and why, there isn't much plot outside of that and is almost entirely reliant on being driven by the characters at play. That's not a bad thing as the characters in the book are incredibly complex and interesting to read about, however, it's just not my usual style of a book as i usually have something plot focused or a mix between plot and character focus, but this didn't disappoint.
As I mentioned, the characters are all really complex and developed starting with the father, James, being ashamed of his Chinese identity and race all of his life, which has meant that all he has ever wanted is to fit in. At the same time, his wife, Marilyn has dreamed of becoming a doctor and standing out as a woman in at the time, a heavily male-dominated profession, but is unable to achieve these dreams as she soon becomes pregnant and has to focus on her family. These unfulfilled dreams of the parents are then pushed onto Lydia, their favourite daughter who they prioritise above everyone else in the family, yet she only wants to conform to what her parents want her to be to make them happy, particularly her mother, leaving Lydia without a fixed identity and having very few people who understand her and her situation. This favouritism then means that the other children, Nath, and in particular, Hannah are ignored not just by their parents but also by each other yet they are also their own characters as Nath is hellbent on escaping the family by going to Harvard despite it meaning that he'll have to leave his sister behind, whilst Hannah almost acts as an observer rather than a person, due to her noticing things when the other characters don't.
This creates a fascinating family dynamic that is explored in both the past, when Lydia was alive, and the present, following her death and we see how the family's attempt to appear normal begins to crack under the pressure and can't handle it anymore. The themes of expectations, belonging and alienation, race, gender roles, and secrets were all really interesting to see throughout the book and it felt like they were all handled really well and carefully too. I also really liked that, while we as the reader can infer why Lydia did what she did, even though it's never explicitly said, the characters are even more in the dark than us due to the divisions that were present in the family leading up to Lydia's death, and so never truly know what happened, giving a sense of reality and realism like so many cases have in which the families don't often get closure nor do they get all the details.
Overall, this was a really fun and interesting book to read that kept me constantly interested and I liked the variety of themes that it covered. The lack of a fixed ending but also having some optimism for the future worked as an ending that didn't cop out and have a happy ending as an easy solution to a really complex storyline and character dynamics.
In deeply analysing it, I feel like I have only enjoyed the book more because I really like this novel and that's quite shocking because while there is an initial plot of Lydia dying and the family trying to figure out how she died and once learning it was suicide, trying to figure out what drove her to that point and why, there isn't much plot outside of that and is almost entirely reliant on being driven by the characters at play. That's not a bad thing as the characters in the book are incredibly complex and interesting to read about, however, it's just not my usual style of a book as i usually have something plot focused or a mix between plot and character focus, but this didn't disappoint.
As I mentioned, the characters are all really complex and developed starting with the father, James, being ashamed of his Chinese identity and race all of his life, which has meant that all he has ever wanted is to fit in. At the same time, his wife, Marilyn has dreamed of becoming a doctor and standing out as a woman in at the time, a heavily male-dominated profession, but is unable to achieve these dreams as she soon becomes pregnant and has to focus on her family. These unfulfilled dreams of the parents are then pushed onto Lydia, their favourite daughter who they prioritise above everyone else in the family, yet she only wants to conform to what her parents want her to be to make them happy, particularly her mother, leaving Lydia without a fixed identity and having very few people who understand her and her situation. This favouritism then means that the other children, Nath, and in particular, Hannah are ignored not just by their parents but also by each other yet they are also their own characters as Nath is hellbent on escaping the family by going to Harvard despite it meaning that he'll have to leave his sister behind, whilst Hannah almost acts as an observer rather than a person, due to her noticing things when the other characters don't.
This creates a fascinating family dynamic that is explored in both the past, when Lydia was alive, and the present, following her death and we see how the family's attempt to appear normal begins to crack under the pressure and can't handle it anymore. The themes of expectations, belonging and alienation, race, gender roles, and secrets were all really interesting to see throughout the book and it felt like they were all handled really well and carefully too. I also really liked that, while we as the reader can infer why Lydia did what she did, even though it's never explicitly said, the characters are even more in the dark than us due to the divisions that were present in the family leading up to Lydia's death, and so never truly know what happened, giving a sense of reality and realism like so many cases have in which the families don't often get closure nor do they get all the details.
Overall, this was a really fun and interesting book to read that kept me constantly interested and I liked the variety of themes that it covered. The lack of a fixed ending but also having some optimism for the future worked as an ending that didn't cop out and have a happy ending as an easy solution to a really complex storyline and character dynamics.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Cursing, Death, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Grief, Suicide attempt, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Child abuse, Confinement, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Xenophobia, Death of parent, Toxic friendship, and Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Bullying, Homophobia, Rape, Vomit, Stalking, Cultural appropriation, Alcohol, and Classism
katharina90's review against another edition
dark
emotional
sad
slow-paced
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
2.0
The characters are unlikeable with zero redeeming qualities, there's so much abuse and trauma being inflicted that was triggering for me, and in the end it feels like there's no real resolution and no accountability for what these people did to one another.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse, Infidelity, Racism, and Sexism
Moderate: Child death, Racial slurs, and Violence
Minor: Homophobia and Suicide
sammyb's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death and Alcohol
Moderate: Racial slurs, Racism, and Suicide
Minor: Homophobia and Sexism
deebee223's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Death, Infidelity, Grief, Abandonment, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Bullying, Homophobia, Physical abuse, and Sexism
Minor: Suicide and Alcohol
hm000's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
reflective
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Infidelity, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, Sexual content, and Grief
Moderate: Suicide, Outing, and Alcohol
Minor: Homophobia
blumoonie's review against another edition
dark
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
i dont have words for how this book moved me. the relstionships and dreams in particular were so realistic i felt that they were my own, and the ending so bittersweet it will haunt me for years.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Racial slurs, Racism, and Sexism
Moderate: Homophobia and Suicide
kxtekss's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
this book was sad. like so sad I think it might have been to the detriment of the book's overall quality because I'd feel sick reading it. so incredibly sad I thought about tabling it, but Ng is such a great writer that I couldn't bring myself to do it.
this book will leave you feeling hollow, will force you to come face to face with everything in your life that you've done right and wrong, as if there can really be a right and a wrong. as the title implies, you'll think of everything these characters never tell each other and think of all the things you should say but couldn't, and the things you did say but didn't mean. this is my second novel by Ng, and I think this might be her specialty. she can create a story that is just so heartbreakingly beautiful.
Ng does a wonderful job of switching between the POVs of various characters, showing us what each person was feeling, how others interpreted it, and the reality of the consequences of their actions. I thought this is what made the book extraordinarily special---you were watching everyone's feelings unfold so fluidly before your eyes, and by the time you find out what happened to Lydia, you realize just how preventable it could have been.
again, it's a sad book, so caution going into it, but I'd suggest. personally, I think Ng might be one of the best contemporary writers out there.
this book will leave you feeling hollow, will force you to come face to face with everything in your life that you've done right and wrong, as if there can really be a right and a wrong. as the title implies, you'll think of everything these characters never tell each other and think of all the things you should say but couldn't, and the things you did say but didn't mean. this is my second novel by Ng, and I think this might be her specialty. she can create a story that is just so heartbreakingly beautiful.
Ng does a wonderful job of switching between the POVs of various characters, showing us what each person was feeling, how others interpreted it, and the reality of the consequences of their actions. I thought this is what made the book extraordinarily special---you were watching everyone's feelings unfold so fluidly before your eyes, and by the time you find out what happened to Lydia, you realize just how preventable it could have been.
again, it's a sad book, so caution going into it, but I'd suggest. personally, I think Ng might be one of the best contemporary writers out there.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Misogyny, Racism, Sexism, and Grief
Moderate: Infidelity, Racial slurs, and Suicide
Minor: Homophobia and Outing
ptitirodactyle's review against another edition
dark
emotional
mysterious
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Death, Infidelity, and Grief
Moderate: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, and Suicide
Minor: Death of parent and Outing
mariposa517's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Racial slurs, Racism, and Abandonment
Minor: Child abuse, Homophobia, Vomit, and Injury/Injury detail
emilo's review against another edition
dark
emotional
mysterious
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Racial slurs, Racism, and Grief
Minor: Homophobia, Suicide, and Violence