Reviews tagging 'Grief'

I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman

126 reviews

vivisms_82's review against another edition

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challenging reflective medium-paced
  • Strong character development? Yes

4.0

Only a small book but it packs a thought provoking, philosophical punch. The subject matter is definitely not a cheery, summer read! It is bleak and heavy at times. I guess, for me, it is a tale of the highest oppression; a world where sensory deprivation and social interaction is forbidden; basic education is no longer, zero privacy (no toileting or washing alone), living in constant fear of violence under the watch of guards. For our main character (who is nameless) we see the impact of all this on her as a human that knows no differently. We begin with her as a child among adult women - no men are imprisoned however the guards are male. I found this deeply reflective on the human experience. Thought it was terrific and not sure why it's not as well known in the English speaking world. I keep thinking about it weeks after finishing it. This book has been described as one that explores loneliness and survival. For me, it's also about our need for connection to the people we share our world with and the need to make sense of the world we live in. It's about how our world, the people in our circle and life experience shape our view and sense of self. This book will make you question how devastating it can be when the human experience we know has been stripped away and our senses, brains and souls aren't nourished, stimulated or challenged. 

** note: If you are one of those people that require answers to all your questions then this is not for you. And I think that (at least for me) only strengthens the story.
Our protagonist gets her information from the women that are all older than her. Not from experiencing anything first hand or learning from a book, tv, internet etc. So once they escape, her view of her world is largely shaped by these 39 women - and their varying opinions, and of their own faded memories and experiences of pre oppressive, imprisoned life. They have not forgotten the violence and that is what makes them so obedient. But their memories pre-imprisonment is vastly lost. My point is, we the reader don't get further answers because our protagonist doesn't know them. That, for me, is what made this book so terrific - no explanation of why she and all the other people were in cells, of their world before or where they are now - is this earth in the future? Is this another planet? A parallel universe? Where is everyone? By not having these questions answered, we are forced to see this world and horrible human experience through this girl's eyes - a girl that knows no different. Truly masterful. 
 

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hoopoebird's review against another edition

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adventurous dark emotional mysterious reflective sad fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

5.0


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bookmuva's review against another edition

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challenging emotional mysterious reflective fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? N/A
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

IT’S COMPLICATED

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peachybee53's review against another edition

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challenging dark mysterious tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I Who Have Never Known Men has thrown me into an existential spiral. It is intimate, brazenly honest, relatable in its raw humanness but also extremely eerie. I enjoyed the stream-of-consciousness style which reads like a personal diary. I found it quite painful to keep going at times, but understand that that was a part of the storytelling itself. 

Our protagonist is forced to discover something, anything, which she can have control over, and thus finds herself navigating a new world of internal possibility, ideas and change. There is a disconnect between her and those around her, the outside world, her own body and mind. There are feelings of isolation, fury, confusion, and a subtle but persistent sense of survival, hope & curiosity. The acts of thought, imagination, communication & education become quiet & stubborn forms of rebellion, finding sense where there is none.

The overall feeling of this book is one of somber monotony, such as an endless void or electrical static. And yet, I am changed by having read it.

"She lost her mind in the cerebral convolutions, the mysterious nooks and crannies of the memory, she had gone backwards, seeking a world that made sense, losing her way among the labyrinths, slowly deteriorating, dimming, noiselessly being obliterated and then fading away so gradually that it was impossible to pinpoint the transition between the flickering little flame and the shadows."

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ssolov's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional mysterious reflective tense medium-paced

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liesthemoontells's review against another edition

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adventurous challenging dark emotional mysterious reflective relaxing sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

This was a beautiful, haunting, moving book. I had put off reading it as the themes sounded incredibly heavy, but after a friend's recommendation and assurance that it was more of a reflective read I decided to tackle it. 

While the book's themes are complex, heavy, and at times very dark, Harpman's treatment of the subject matter is more meditative and philosophical than shock provoking. There are many ruminations on what it means to be human, on navigating love, gender, and human connection when you have been given no reference point. 

I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone who needs resolutions to their mystery fiction but if you are looking for a powerful and ambivalent piece of speculative literature I could not recommend it more.

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now_booking's review against another edition

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adventurous dark emotional mysterious reflective sad slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.5

This was an interesting and unique exploration of what it might be like to come of age in a world completely without the trappings of culture, history, familial and social baggage and of course, men. Yet, despite the title, this is not a criticism or analysis of gender norms or an argument against the patriarchy. Indeed, my reading of “(not having ever) known men” is that the the nameless heroine may not only be referring to the male race even though that’s literally how she frames it and thinks about it, but figuratively (or synecdochically), in a broader sense, she refers to not ever having known “man” or the human race and all its trappings. For the heroine, raised in captivity, in a planet that might be earth or not at a time that might be contemporary or futuristic, conditioned to avoid human touch, raised without a name, without a fixation on identity or appearance or privacy, without understanding love or connection, no concept of time or seasons or of life or death, or art or history or the scope of the world or the universe, she has to find her own meaning to human existence, craft her own understanding of community and society and the vagaries of human behaviour, of time and body, sexuality and society.

In this coming of age tale, the heroine who spends much of her life isolated recounts her story as she remembers it perhaps pursuing the natural human instinct to be acknowledged to have existed at some time in history. Because of the unique way the heroine was raised (or raised herself), she’s not given to much emotion, so this feels like a very detached recounting of what is simultaneously and extraordinary and mundane existence. It’s not at all an exciting book but it is one that keeps you going even if just in the hopes that you’ll learn along with the protagonist where she and the 39 other women were kidnapped and taken to and for what reason. 

I overall thought this was really unique and different and I’m glad I read it but I’m not passionate about it. I thought there was very little “so what” about having never known men. Towards the end, the author tried to make some inferences that are beautifully written but they never quite landed in elaborating on “the point”. This felt somewhat experimental for experiments sake and I wish the author had gone a little further with this. I recommend reading this if you’re looking for something quiet and uneventful, thought-provoking, and slightly disturbing (and sad).

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poirot's review against another edition

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emotional reflective sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.25


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acgeorge's review against another edition

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adventurous challenging dark sad slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? It's complicated
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0


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allisoncdn's review against another edition

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dark mysterious reflective slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? No

3.0

I’m afraid that I did not really enjoy this much. I was expecting answers at some point of the book and felt disappointed.
I liked the questions about what makes us humans, but the plot was almost non existent.
I got bored a couple of times because not much happens and the side characters are really flat. The writing is beautiful though!

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