vistacanas's review
4.0
“When is someone in this family going to break free and live?”
My interest in the royals doesn’t run deep. I read a lot of historical fiction about Britain so I have a decent grasp of royal history, I thought Diana was an amazing human and was horrifically mistreated by the family (and the paparazzi, of course), and I’ve watched every season of The Crown. That’s pretty much it. But, it’s enough for me to know that if I was forced to pick a team, I’d definitely be on Team Harry (which, by the way, would be Team Diana-Harry were she still alive).
Harry took a lot of flack in my online book groups when the book was released…and, now that I’ve finished it, my suspicions are confirmed. Harry isn’t a stellar writer, so he doesn’t always convey his totally justifiable feelings in the most ideal possible way. I believe those who viciously criticized him lack empathy, a basic grasp of psychology, and are very likely the ones who keep the paparazzi in business by reading and believing their trash.
Speaking from firsthand experience, I can confirm 100% that money and privilege do not excuse ANY human being from the emotional repercussions of a lack of love and abuse. Love is in very short supply in the royal family…that’s clear in every single thing I’ve ever read or watched about them, not just from Harry’s story. Appearances, power, pettiness, and manipulation totally trump love and that creates pain for those who value love more. The paparazzi is beyond abusive and unbelievably racist. What they do is not a price anyone should EVER have to pay. I feel deeply for Harry and Meghan and am SO glad that they were brave enough to break free and live.
Despite there being a lot more pages of the book dedicated to Harry’s military experiences than I expected, I totally enjoyed spending the last few days with him. If we’re in a relationship, whether we’re male or female, may we all be so lucky to have a partner that is willing to do whatever it takes to protect us. Harry is a good man. I hope that he is able to build a better and safer life for his family…and I hope karma works it’s magic on a few particular members of his family.
Graphic: Drug use, Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, Racism, War, Alcohol, Grief, Abandonment, Racial slurs, Bullying, Death of parent, and Gaslighting
Moderate: Animal death, Panic attacks/disorders, and Car accident
Minor: Miscarriage, Pregnancy, and Suicidal thoughts
hannahcstocks's review against another edition
3.75
Graphic: Racial slurs, Abandonment, Xenophobia, Violence, Drug abuse, Sexual content, Misogyny, Injury/Injury detail, Stalking, Classism, Alcohol, Pregnancy, Cultural appropriation, Child abuse, Bullying, Toxic relationship, Suicidal thoughts, Emotional abuse, Drug use, Death of parent, Death, Racism, Panic attacks/disorders, Mental illness, Gaslighting, Colonisation, War, Murder, and Miscarriage
kbairbooks's review
4.0
Graphic: Alcohol, Misogyny, War, Abandonment, Bullying, Panic attacks/disorders, Stalking, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Hate crime, Mental illness, Miscarriage, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Classism, Death of parent, Drug use, Pregnancy, Racism, Car accident, and Racial slurs
Minor: Pandemic/Epidemic
ash_bees's review
3.0
Other reviewers commented that this reads as if written by multiple authors, I'd suggest at least three. The writing could have benefitted from a really heavy editor, and would have been more effective if it was cut down to half or a third. But that seems to be par for the course for books I've read from people with celebrity status.
The takeaways from this are two-fold: (1) the importance of speaking up to right wrongs, especially when you're an ally and not the target; and (2) knowing that speaking up may not change the offender's future actions but can gain you more allies or let other similarly situated people know they're not alone.
Lots of trigger warnings for this book. I wouldn't necessarily say it's spilling the tea, but it does cover lots of death, feelings of abandonment and betrayal, and stalking.
Graphic: Alcoholism, Abandonment, Alcohol, Child death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Death, Death of parent, Panic attacks/disorders, Toxic relationship, Animal death, Bullying, Car accident, Classism, Racial slurs, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, and Miscarriage
kimveach's review against another edition
4.0
This is a story of a boy without a stable home life whose mother dies tragically. That trauma carries into war zones and his search for a relationship that can withstand the scrutiny of the press. With the help of therapy, he's able to move forward.
Some of the best parts for me were learning about life in the palace, at Eton, and in the army. It was also fascinating to learn how Prince Charles divided royal duties and access to money between the brothers.
Graphic: Bullying, Death, Panic attacks/disorders, Alcohol, Suicidal thoughts, Racism, Sexual content, Torture, Drug use, Mental illness, Racial slurs, Toxic relationship, Violence, Vomit, Abandonment, Death of parent, Gun violence, Injury/Injury detail, Medical content, Medical trauma, Miscarriage, War, Classism, Grief, Pregnancy, Car accident, and Cursing
issyd23's review against another edition
3.0
Other thoughts:
- I cannot believe I now know that Prince Harry is circumcised
- Find it hilarious that according to Haz Charles is in his ‘Camilla era’ - Taylor take note! ✍️
- On a serious note his hatred of the media (especially Murdoch) is palpable - I wonder if he’ll pursue them in court
- On a personal note I don’t love that Harry is convinced we (US + allies) were the ‘good guys’ in Afghanistan - and his refusal to think critically about the wider implications and complexities of the war/occupation.
Graphic: Toxic relationship, Addiction, Alcoholism, Antisemitism, Blood, Bullying, Racial slurs, Racism, Self harm, Sexism, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Incest, Infidelity, Injury/Injury detail, Miscarriage, Pandemic/Epidemic, Stalking, Violence, War, Confinement, Cultural appropriation, Cursing, Death of parent, Drug use, Medical content, Mental illness, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Pregnancy, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Body horror, Car accident, Classism, Colonisation, and Grief
kelly_e's review against another edition
4.0
Author: Prince Harry
Genre: Memoir
Rating: 4.00
Pub Date: January 10, 2023
T H R E E • W O R D S
Revelatory • Intimate • Tragic
📖 S Y N O P S I S
It was one of the most searing images of the twentieth century: two young boys, two princes, walking behind their mother’s coffin as the world watched in sorrow—and horror. As Princess Diana was laid to rest, billions wondered what Prince William and Prince Harry must be thinking and feeling—and how their lives would play out from that point on.
For Harry, Spare is that story at last. From his battles with loneliness and anger; to his struggles at school; to his time in the army; to meeting Meghan, their fairy-tale wedding, and being hounded by the press; to finally choosing to step away from the spotlight lest history repeat itself, Harry bares everything in his memoir.
💭 T H O U G H T S
When I first heard that Harry was going to be sharing his story, I wasn't sure if I would read it. I cannot call myself a royal follower, but of all the members of the Royal Family, I have always had a soft spot for Harry. I can relate to being the second-born and his struggles to find himself or his place in the world. Nonetheless, I placed a hold at the library for the audio knowing the wait would be lengthy and when it finally came through I decided I needed to see what everything was about for myself.
Presented in a chronological manner that works best, Spare offers an unprecedented inside look into royal life. With unflinching honesty, Harry holds nothing back detailing his intense loneliness and struggles in the wake of his mother's death. My heart went out to his younger self as he describes how everything was handled and how he chose to believe his mother was simply off on vacation somewhere for many years.
I never realized the extent of the role the media plays and how it sensationalizes a lot. I don't know how anyone can handle having every single thing you do, scrutinized by millions of people. It will come as no surprise that Harry speaks openly about his mental health struggles, which I highly commend him for. The rigorous standards of the monarchy at times even made him feel like a failure, which is just heartbreaking.
The memoir is quite long and there were definitely parts where it lulls throughout the middle. As with everyone's story there are always parts that are more and less interesting. For me, my interest was mostly in his life in the wake of his mother's death, his time in the army, and his and Meghan's life. I'll admit I was a tad disappointed that his life with Meghan comprises only a small part at the end, but I completely understand his reasoning in doing so - privacy has become an very important aspect of their lives and I respect that. At the end of the day, I am glad that they found each other and have created a beautiful life together.
If you're on the fence about Spare, I'd make the suggestion of reading it for yourself so you can form your own opinions. There is no denying he was born into a life of privilege, yet that doesn't mean he isn't entitled to his own feelings, thoughts and desires. The way he and his family have been treated in the wake of stepping down speaks volumes to the outdated conditions of the monarchy. I'd also highly recommend the audio as there's certainly power in the fact he narrates it himself.
📚 R E C O M M E N D • T O
• royal family devotees
• celebrity memoir lovers
🔖 F A V O U R I T E • Q U O T E S
"No one had an answer for a boy actually seeking external pain to match his internal."
"Grief is a thing best shared."
"I'd traveled the world from top to bottom, literally. I'd hopscotched the continents. I'd met hundreds of thousands of people, I'd crossed paths with a ludicrously large cross-section of the planet's seven billion residents. For thirty-two years I'd watched a conveyor-belt of faces pass by and only a handful ever made me look twice. This woman stopped the conveyer belt."
"In this mixed-up world, this pain-filled life, we’d done it. we’d managed to find each other."
Graphic: Bullying, Gaslighting, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Grief, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Injury/Injury detail, Death, Car accident, Racial slurs, War, Death of parent, Suicidal thoughts, Stalking, Abandonment, Suicide, Racism, Animal cruelty, Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Animal death, and Toxic relationship
Minor: Drug use, Alcohol, Classism, Cursing, and Colonisation
⚠️ CW: PTSDsusanlanigan's review
4.5
Graphic: Animal death and Animal cruelty
Moderate: Islamophobia and Abandonment
bookbird's review
3.25
Fame is, often, just abuse in a glittery package. Hereditary fame even more so. Harry has survived an incredible amount.
He's also surprisingly naive, though. He talks about a trip to the North Pole like it was a lads weekend, and not something millions of people dream about doing. One line towards the end really rubbed me up the wrong way - he talks about security at his wedding being a necessity (valid), but cites one of the reasons for this as the press "stirring up racism and class resentment". I certainly don't mean to defend the abhorrent tabloid press here, because they absolutely contributed to (or even created) the racist vitriol aimed at Meghan, but class resentment? Really? In a country where 1 in 5 children live in poverty (even more are food insecure), but we still spend millions on a monarchy that are increasingly out of touch? I don't think that's resentment - I think that's justified anger.
Ultimately, it feels weird to rate this book, but I'm basing my rating purely on how much I actually enjoyed it. Much of it is incredibly interesting, much of it is baffling, but I'm ultimately glad I read it.
Lastly - and I'm saying this as someone who was born here and has only ever lived here - the UK is truly bonkers. What a weird, fucked up country.
Graphic: Pregnancy, Abandonment, Child death, Classism, Colonisation, Death, Death of parent, Drug use, Grief, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Racial slurs, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, and War
lmy612's review against another edition
5.0
This is a very heavy book and I cried many times listening to his recount of very painful topics: his mother’s death, 9/11, self medicating with drugs and alcohol, going to war, racism against his wife and children, threats against their lives, the loss of an unborn child, the toxicity of his family, the death of the Queen, and the paparazzi who refuse(d) to let them live their lives.
This was a highly enjoyable and deeply moving memoir, even for an anti-monarchist living in the colonized commonwealth.
Graphic: Racial slurs, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Injury/Injury detail, Pregnancy, Racism, Alcohol, Classism, Gun violence, Hate crime, Drug use, Animal death, Death of parent, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Grief, Mental illness, War, Death, Stalking, Toxic relationship, Violence, Bullying, Car accident, and Cursing
Moderate: Antisemitism, Cultural appropriation, Cursing, Misogyny, Forced institutionalization, Animal cruelty, Abandonment, Blood, Colonisation, Miscarriage, and Kidnapping