reasonpassion's review against another edition
5.0
There are ways in which this could be looked at as a self-help book, but that would be missing the scope of the problem being addressed. From within religious fundamentalism there is not merely a loss of self but the systematic destruction of the ability to think and feel authentically in a lived-in reality. Being taught to doubt and identify as evil every human aspect of one's existence does not support the ability later to seek self-help. What Winell endeavors to do here is rather a process for laying the foundation of a new life, one that will allow for self-help even as it encourages a new way to look at social connections and one's own relationship to body, mind and emotions. Truly a great beginning to what is a life-time journey.
bellahellebore's review against another edition
5.0
Really, really helpful, I didn’t know I needed help in this area until I stumbled across someone talking about religious trauma on YouTube.
Wow I was really indoctrinated and even though I never really even believed, the guilt I carried because I couldn’t has weighed on me my whole life. This book helped me unpack and sort through a lot of feelings of guilt and shame that I never could understand or logic my way out of.
I will say that I couldn’t bring myself to get behind a lot of the inner child activities, I understand it and will work on re-parenting myself and nurturing the child in me who was neglected, but for example- I will not be buying a doll to represent myself and take around with me ☺️
Wow I was really indoctrinated and even though I never really even believed, the guilt I carried because I couldn’t has weighed on me my whole life. This book helped me unpack and sort through a lot of feelings of guilt and shame that I never could understand or logic my way out of.
I will say that I couldn’t bring myself to get behind a lot of the inner child activities, I understand it and will work on re-parenting myself and nurturing the child in me who was neglected, but for example- I will not be buying a doll to represent myself and take around with me ☺️
melwalker18's review against another edition
3.0
Enjoyed the first part of this book. The second and third parts were not very applicable to me as I’ve already worked through leaving religion but would probably be more helpful to those still newly going through it. Overall contains good information.
girljames's review against another edition
3.0
I LURVED the first third or so of this and skimmed over the rest, which probably I could have used more ten years ago. The author totally nails some things about fundamentalist religion that I had recognised but not known how to articulate - or in some cases, that I had articulated but had everyone around me respond as if no-one had ever thought like me before. Lots (a kind of overwhelming amount) of exercises to help the reader sort out their thoughts. I really appreciated the inner child exercises as that's a model of therapy/personal growth that works for me. There's something kind of folksy white America about the style, but I could look past it for the most part.
fernbomb's review against another edition
4.75
I’ve been deconverted for years, but nonetheless, this book was a timely guide to deconstructing the residue of christianity and the trauma I had been holding.
The author encourages living life after deconstruction from a bit of an individualistic (Western) perspective, with a focus on self achievement and goal setting, but tbh, that’s to be expected and really only stressed in the last few chapters.
The book was written in 1993, and because of that there are a few moments where the author uses outdated terminology (I noticed it in regards to trans people and Asian people).
The author encourages living life after deconstruction from a bit of an individualistic (Western) perspective, with a focus on self achievement and goal setting, but tbh, that’s to be expected and really only stressed in the last few chapters.
The book was written in 1993, and because of that there are a few moments where the author uses outdated terminology (I noticed it in regards to trans people and Asian people).
carriehaven's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
4.25
merryrebecca's review against another edition
4.0
This is essential reading for those leaving a background in fundamental religion. While I wish it had gone further into detail, particularly in the Family Background chapter, the further reading and resources appendix in the back of the book opens up a world of reading and research opportunities. I appreciate Dr. Winell's personal approach to the topic and trailblazing this area of research. Well worth the $20 for this book packed full of therapy exercises.