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khakipantsofsex's review
4.5
Graphic: Addiction, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Grief, and Death of parent
Moderate: Child abuse, Eating disorder, and Self harm
mscalls's review
3.0
Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Child abuse, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Infidelity, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Vomit, Grief, Car accident, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Lesbophobia, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail
jkneebone's review
3.5
The out-of-wedlock daughter of a Chinese Hawaiian mother and a white Jewish father, Madden's parents married when she was young. Her father's family was very wealthy, so Madden grew up riding horses and going to prep school, but she was bullied for her race and her awkwardness. Both her parents struggled with substance abuse, which only got worse as she grew older; at the same time, her father's family/business partners were involved in a major scandal. Her tween and teen years were largely unsupervised and she got into plenty of bad situations herself before moving to New York for college.
The last few sections of the book cover her adulthood, as she forms a relationship with the older half-brothers from her father's first marriage, and discovers more about both of her parents' histories following her father's death.
I found Long Live the Tribe of Fatherless Girls to be a difficult read because so much of what happened to Madden as a child is really upsetting. The honesty of the memoir was striking, but it felt like digesting a long string of terrible facts without any emotions or framing. We don't get much about how T Kira Madden felt during or about all of these things - everything is presented in a very pared-back, straightforward way, perhaps because she was a child at the time and didn't know better or understand why she should be upset? But I wish we had gotten more of an insight into her thoughts.
It's especially jarring because towards the end, when we actually get a bit more of her reactions to things (as an adult), it's clear that she really loves both of her parents, and it's hard to reconcile how she was able to forgive them for their neglect and go on to have a healthy relationship with them as an adult. She goes from not understanding her parents substance abuse, or at most being resigned/blandly disappointed by it, to loving them as an adult; it felt like we skipped over the anger, disappointment, hurt etc. that surely must have been part of her aging process.
This book gets a 3.5 instead of a 3 from me because I thought it was well written, and I really did enjoy the last Part, when we learn more about her family history.
To be honest, I might not have finished this if I weren't reading it for a book club, but I'm glad I did. I feel like my reaction to it might partially be me missing the point or being unwilling to internalize just how dangerous some parents can be. It was well written but I wish I'd gotten more of the author's feelings and reactions throughout the story. A challenging read because of the content, but probably worth picking up if you like less traditional formatting and/or memoirs.
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Sexual assault, and Death of parent
Moderate: Eating disorder, Racial slurs, Racism, and Sexual harassment
1quillb's review against another edition
5.0
Graphic: Addiction, Domestic abuse, and Racial slurs
Moderate: Adult/minor relationship, Cursing, Drug abuse, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Suicide, Death of parent, and Toxic friendship
Minor: Body shaming, Xenophobia, Vomit, Pregnancy, Abandonment, and Sexual harassment
sarahmerfi's review
5.0
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Pedophilia, Rape, and Sexual content
Moderate: Addiction, Toxic relationship, and Grief
Minor: Death of parent
jarku's review against another edition
3.25
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Death of parent, and Alcohol
Moderate: Infidelity, Racial slurs, Terminal illness, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Xenophobia, Toxic friendship, and Abandonment
Minor: Eating disorder, Toxic relationship, and Lesbophobia
yomireads's review against another edition
3.5
This book is deeply painful and unflinchingly honest about very difficult things, and I was not the target audience for this story. Having said that, I appreciate and applaud the courage and skill of this memoir. It's a beautifully written and powerfully moving story that I believe needed to be told. I know there are many who will benefit from reading this and feel seen, connected to, and unalone in these pages.
For my part, I found the nonlinear storytelling to be confusing and quite hard to keep straight in my mind as far as who was alive, when events happened relative to one another, and the relative age of anyone at any given moment. I was deeply disturbed by the graphic depictions of her sexual assault, but feel uncomfortable truly criticizing it as I know feeling disturbed is a part of what is meant to be evoked, and any victim should be permitted to claim their story and find strength in it however they can.
All else that might have made me squirm, I have no true qualms as far as the memoir goes, as a critique of non fiction, by its very nature, can't be about story content. It's about a life, and no outside observer/reader can truly say what deserves to be included in that realm.
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Bullying, Drug abuse, Drug use, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Death of parent, Lesbophobia, and Alcohol
Moderate: Domestic abuse and Homophobia
Minor: Adult/minor relationship, Biphobia, and Infertility
merldia's review
5.0
Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Bullying, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Medical content, Grief, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Lesbophobia, Fire/Fire injury, and Injury/Injury detail
poenaestante's review
4.0
Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Homophobia, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, and Abandonment
v_vian_ne's review
4.5
Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Racial slurs, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, and Death of parent