Reviews tagging 'Self harm'

A Woman Is No Man by Etaf Rum

46 reviews

bookishevy's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative inspiring mysterious reflective sad tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Palestine, 1990. Seventeen-year-old naive bookworm Isra, who is married her off in Palestine to the much older Adam and taken to Brooklyn, where they live with her oppressive mother-in-law, Fareeda, who grows increasingly frustrated when Isra keeps birthing daughters instead of the sons they desire.

Brooklyn, 2008. Eighteen-year-old Deya, whose dreams of going to college are ignored while her grandmother sets up potential suitors for her, because she thinks the only way Deya can have a future is through marriage. Someone from Deya's past intervenes and Deya learns a shocking truth about her family that could strengthen her will to make her own choices about her future. 

There are so many layers to this story that is told through the eyes of three generations of Palestinian women having to grapple with rules made by the men within their culture as they struggle to find their voices amidst the fear of bringing shame to their family. The flashbacks to Fareeda and her family getting kicked out of their homes by Isreali forces and having to live in camps for years before migrating to the U.S. Struggling with the cultural differences while trying to maintain their Muslim/Arab identity. 

There were times I felt suffocated while reading Isra's dilemma. She's caught between wanting better for her daughters and a hopelessness around them ending up like her. I felt immense hate for Fareeda, while acknowledging that she's a product of this culture, raised to believe that girls/women should know their place or suffer the consequences. TW: domestic violence.

This is a heartbreaking read with a hopeful ending.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse

Moderate: Self harm

elizabethww's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative inspiring mysterious reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

This book was so emotional, so hard to read, and so real. The ending left me in awe with a feeling of confusion, until I began to put together some pieces of the story that I had found confusing when they happened. It all fell into place. In the end, I was flabbergasted – an amazing read. I highly recommend this book.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Genocide, Miscarriage, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Death of parent, Murder, Pregnancy, Gaslighting, War, and Injury/Injury detail

michaelion's review against another edition

emotional hopeful reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

I read Evil Eye last month and gave it 5 stars, and it's near impossible for me to give things 5 stars, so I figured this woman must be amazing I gotta read what else she has. Only one other book?! How heartbreaking! I need more! Etaf Rum the woman that you are!!!

I do feel that if I had read this book first and Evil Eye second, I still would've given Evil Eye 5 stars. These books were written for the culture. Not my culture, but the importance of them, the weight of them, were not just to represent Palestinians and Arabs, but to show other Arabs "this is who we are, we have stories to tell, and we have to be honest with ourselves" and I love that SO much. Etaf Rum you will always be famous!!!

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Alcoholism, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Grief, Death of parent, Murder, Gaslighting, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Child death, Confinement, Genocide, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Abandonment, Colonisation, War, and Deportation

Minor: Body horror, Drug use, Fatphobia, Miscarriage, Islamophobia, Stalking, and Car accident

jordynkw's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Violence, Death of parent, Pregnancy, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Addiction, Alcoholism, Child death, Gore, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Self harm, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Car accident, Abortion, Suicide attempt, and Alcohol

lilystheme's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful inspiring mysterious sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

i fucking love this book my god

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexism, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Religious bigotry, Abortion, Death of parent, and Murder

Moderate: Alcoholism, Genocide, Self harm, Sexism, Suicide, Islamophobia, Pregnancy, and War

jlfields925's review against another edition

emotional hopeful informative sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Violence, Death of parent, Pregnancy, and Alcohol

Moderate: Child death and Car accident

Minor: Miscarriage, Islamophobia, and Abortion

capaurus's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Sexual violence, Abortion, and Pregnancy

Moderate: Alcoholism, Child abuse, Confinement, Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Religious bigotry, Death of parent, Colonisation, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Eating disorder

ranbara's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? N/A
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Never before has a book brought me to tears.. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Confinement, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Murder, and Pregnancy

Moderate: Death, Drug use, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Islamophobia, and Alcohol

Minor: Car accident

scribblinginthemargins's review against another edition

emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

A compelling and powerful inter generational family saga about the successive cycles of trauma experienced by the women of a Palestinian family living in Brooklyn. I read this book compulsively finding myself caught in the family's narrative and understanding how disempowerment and shame create a cycle of intergenerational trauma. 

Depsite the dark and difficult parts of this story, the narrative of women struggling to find their voice and learn their worth is so poignant. A 5-star read for sure.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Slavery, Islamophobia, Grief, Death of parent, Murder, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Self harm, Abortion, and Pregnancy

ladyinverse's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

I will definitely think about this book for a long time. probably the most harrowing novel I've read and the writing was absolutely captivating and gripping. 

I found myself cheering or yelling oh no at the characters as I read the deeper and deeper I got into this story.

Etaf Rum is certainly a new auto buy author for me. Her writing is elegant and captivating and her story telling transports you to the characters she's portraying.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Confinement, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Self harm, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Suicide attempt, Murder, and Pregnancy

Moderate: Xenophobia and War

Minor: Abortion