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iamavidreader's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
slow-paced
5.0
agniguha01's review against another edition
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
This is a manifesto as well as a log book of female experiences in India. Legitimising feminine fears, anxieties and trauma, both physical and mental. It lays bare the cultural systems which render women powerless and non-existent. "An unequal culture survives on collapsed women. It is political strategy."
I felt disappointed with the omnipresence of the experiences shared but also empowered. I saw myself and all the women I know in the women interviewed. "Our culture bestows power on men and morality on women."
The book is meant to establish solidarity. It's not just about women though. The same cultural conditioning that chokes women also suffocate men with ultra masculine codes pf conduct. Liberation of women is also liberation of men from shackles of societal expectations and gender performances.
" Women's love without any power becomes anaemic and men's power without love becomes abusive."
"Bias is cultural dirt. Accumulated dirt becomes filth. It kills."
This book dissects every form of a woman's lived encounter with patriarchy, from the most "negligible" or the most "violating" of offences against women by the society.
This is a very very important catalogue of what's it like being a woman in India and HOW TO CHANGE THESE CULTURAL SYSTEMS.
I felt disappointed with the omnipresence of the experiences shared but also empowered. I saw myself and all the women I know in the women interviewed. "Our culture bestows power on men and morality on women."
The book is meant to establish solidarity. It's not just about women though. The same cultural conditioning that chokes women also suffocate men with ultra masculine codes pf conduct. Liberation of women is also liberation of men from shackles of societal expectations and gender performances.
" Women's love without any power becomes anaemic and men's power without love becomes abusive."
"Bias is cultural dirt. Accumulated dirt becomes filth. It kills."
This book dissects every form of a woman's lived encounter with patriarchy, from the most "negligible" or the most "violating" of offences against women by the society.
This is a very very important catalogue of what's it like being a woman in India and HOW TO CHANGE THESE CULTURAL SYSTEMS.
starryeyedenigma's review against another edition
emotional
informative
reflective
fast-paced
3.75
This book is a work of non fiction, based on 600+ interviews that the author and her team carried out from Indian women living in metro cities in India or abroad, belonging to rich or upper middle class families - aka, families earning more than 20L rupees per annum. Educated women. Financially independent women. And what their thoughts were on "what it means to be a woman in India."
The discussion topics are categorized into these areas: Body, Voice, Pleasing, Sexuality, Isolation and Identity. Similar to the book I read recently on disability in fairy tales by Amanda Leduc, the author Deepa Narayan, uses facts and arguments to build a strong case for societal and cultural changes instead of asking individual women to fight for their rights or blaming men.
I appreciated the fact that along with interview snippets and research based statistics, the author clearly articulates the deeply ingrained societal issues when it comes to women's rights and safety and also suggests workable solutions.
Majorly triggering for me was the first chapter on Body, that talks about molestation, rape and physical abuse. How 50% of Indian women (yes, me too), have been molested or abused once or more and have to be constantly on fight/flight mode, which is absolutely exhausting. That education and financial independence still do not equate to respect and safety for women. In this regards, instead of asking women to change, stay indoors, cover herself more, attract less attention, the society as a whole should emphasize men to behave and keep their lust and rage in check, or better, use it in a boxing ring!
Finally, the key takeaway for me as an individual woman from this book was, that we women need to encourage and champion other women and stand up for each other. When I was younger, I also used to think men were cool, or made better friends and that women were jealous and gossiped too much, until I grew older and realized when push comes to shove, only women stand up with you, beside you. Now I have female friends who are like soulmates to me. Women who are simply amazing in every aspect.
The discussion topics are categorized into these areas: Body, Voice, Pleasing, Sexuality, Isolation and Identity. Similar to the book I read recently on disability in fairy tales by Amanda Leduc, the author Deepa Narayan, uses facts and arguments to build a strong case for societal and cultural changes instead of asking individual women to fight for their rights or blaming men.
I appreciated the fact that along with interview snippets and research based statistics, the author clearly articulates the deeply ingrained societal issues when it comes to women's rights and safety and also suggests workable solutions.
Majorly triggering for me was the first chapter on Body, that talks about molestation, rape and physical abuse. How 50% of Indian women (yes, me too), have been molested or abused once or more and have to be constantly on fight/flight mode, which is absolutely exhausting. That education and financial independence still do not equate to respect and safety for women. In this regards, instead of asking women to change, stay indoors, cover herself more, attract less attention, the society as a whole should emphasize men to behave and keep their lust and rage in check, or better, use it in a boxing ring!
Finally, the key takeaway for me as an individual woman from this book was, that we women need to encourage and champion other women and stand up for each other. When I was younger, I also used to think men were cool, or made better friends and that women were jealous and gossiped too much, until I grew older and realized when push comes to shove, only women stand up with you, beside you. Now I have female friends who are like soulmates to me. Women who are simply amazing in every aspect.
aabha's review against another edition
5.0
I will be coming back to this and rereading it. It’s stunning and depressing, the state of Indian women. Myself included. Please read this. Everybody.
roshreviews's review against another edition
2.0
I wanted to like this book so much. I tried my best to. But sadly, I just couldn't. It just drags and drags after the first couple of chapters. I would have DNFed it were it not for the guilt factor to read it out of loyalty to my gender. The writing style is more like a feminist rant. I am agree with many of the points given in the book but not all. A more grounded approach and a different writing style (less of the bluster and more of pragmatic action points) would have made this book so much better and impactful. This is a case of good intention with bad execution.