Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'
Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern
6 reviews
violetends's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
reflective
slow-paced
4.75
Throughout the last years I've been slowly reading myself through the polyam books everyone is talking about. I am simultaneously glad and sad it took me so long to get to Polysecure. I could have needed this at the beginning of my exploration of polyam connections. But also it was so helpful reading it now and reflecting upon the experiences I have already made and how I shifted along the different types Fern describes here.
This is well-researched and based on years of personal experience as a therapist focused on non-monogamous individuals and relationships. Her perspective is empathetic while gently nudging the reader to glance at painful feelings, experiences and own behaviours. I appreciate this combination a lot and consider it much more helpful than other approaches I have sometimes read.
Polysecure is a good introduction to nonmonogamy but I also believe that more experienced people can take a lot from it, or those who are in connections with people who are less experienced.
This is well-researched and based on years of personal experience as a therapist focused on non-monogamous individuals and relationships. Her perspective is empathetic while gently nudging the reader to glance at painful feelings, experiences and own behaviours. I appreciate this combination a lot and consider it much more helpful than other approaches I have sometimes read.
Polysecure is a good introduction to nonmonogamy but I also believe that more experienced people can take a lot from it, or those who are in connections with people who are less experienced.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Abandonment, Toxic relationship, Child abuse, and Misogyny
emfass's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Infidelity, Emotional abuse, and Toxic relationship
Minor: Child abuse and Abandonment
ulknehs's review against another edition
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.5
3.5 stars overall.
The first part is a great and accessible overview of attachment theory and the impact of trauma; I'd give part one 4 stars.
Part two is a good discussion of consensual non-monogamy and makes an argument for the importance of an attachment lens on CNM. I learnt some things despite being involved and interested in non-monogamy for many years.
Part three is where the book fell slightly short for me. It is a self-help/how-to approach to developing secure attachment in relationships (monogamous or otherwise). It was helpful and interesting, but undermined by its individualistic perspective.
The first part is a great and accessible overview of attachment theory and the impact of trauma; I'd give part one 4 stars.
Part two is a good discussion of consensual non-monogamy and makes an argument for the importance of an attachment lens on CNM. I learnt some things despite being involved and interested in non-monogamy for many years.
Part three is where the book fell slightly short for me. It is a self-help/how-to approach to developing secure attachment in relationships (monogamous or otherwise). It was helpful and interesting, but undermined by its individualistic perspective.
Content Warnings
Minor: Infidelity
rtaire's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Infidelity, and Toxic relationship
Minor: Abandonment and Child abuse
sjanke2's review against another edition
1.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Grief, Infidelity, and Toxic relationship
smoladeryn's review against another edition
challenging
hopeful
informative
slow-paced
5.0
Phenomenal book for everyone, not just those seeking or practicing polyamory!
I knew most of the concepts in the book before going in, but the way they were collated and presented was digestible, practical, and with utmost compassion.
MUST READ! <3
I knew most of the concepts in the book before going in, but the way they were collated and presented was digestible, practical, and with utmost compassion.
MUST READ! <3
Content Warnings
Moderate: Gaslighting, Grief, Infidelity, Abandonment, Ableism, Child abuse, Colonisation, Classism, Death, Emotional abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Domestic abuse, and Violence
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