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fuzzywuzzy's review against another edition
5.0
This was pretty intense but that's par for the course with this author. I felt like I questioned a lot when I read it and I related to a lot. It wasn't a feel good book because of the subject matter and because there was no coming back from what happened for the people involved. It's a definite must read. This author never disappoints.
dr_manuela_reads's review against another edition
2.0
I usually like this authorâs work, but I could not get myself to finish this book. It is full of cliches and repetition.
Amberâs boyfriend seems like a dopy teenager and her best friend, Tyler the worse stereotype of a friend waiting to become more than that. Amber sounds a stereotypical dumb female.
Could not, would not finish. I hate these portrayals of gender, especially the women.
Amberâs boyfriend seems like a dopy teenager and her best friend, Tyler the worse stereotype of a friend waiting to become more than that. Amber sounds a stereotypical dumb female.
Could not, would not finish. I hate these portrayals of gender, especially the women.
kaylakaotik's review against another edition
5.0
This is, without a doubt, my favorite book by Amy Hatvany.
It Happens All the Time is a fantastically written book. It was written was such a raw and emotional honesty that's exactly what this kind of book needs. I think it's so important that the story was told from both Amber's and Tyler's points of view. In seeing the story from both of their perspectives, we see each of their struggles and how they dealt with the aftermath of what happened that night. As Amy says in the beginning of the book: "I wasnât trying to create false empathy for rapists; rather, I wanted to help readers recognize rape culture as not just a womanâs problem but as a societal problem, and one that we each have a hand (and a stake) in solving." Our society focuses so much on teaching girls and women what to do (or not to do) to avoid getting sexually assaulted, and while that's helpful, perhaps we need to take time to teach our boys/men how to identify consent.
To say that this book is a must-read is an understatement. Please, read it.
* This book was received from Atria Books via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. *
It Happens All the Time is a fantastically written book. It was written was such a raw and emotional honesty that's exactly what this kind of book needs. I think it's so important that the story was told from both Amber's and Tyler's points of view. In seeing the story from both of their perspectives, we see each of their struggles and how they dealt with the aftermath of what happened that night. As Amy says in the beginning of the book: "I wasnât trying to create false empathy for rapists; rather, I wanted to help readers recognize rape culture as not just a womanâs problem but as a societal problem, and one that we each have a hand (and a stake) in solving." Our society focuses so much on teaching girls and women what to do (or not to do) to avoid getting sexually assaulted, and while that's helpful, perhaps we need to take time to teach our boys/men how to identify consent.
To say that this book is a must-read is an understatement. Please, read it.
* This book was received from Atria Books via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. *
cemsreadingcorner's review against another edition
4.0
I give this book 3.5 stars. The reason is because none of the characters were likable. I mean, the only characters I liked were Amberâs parents. They were very supportive of Amber (main character) after what she went through. Other than that, I donât like anyone else. Amber did something bad to her fiancĂ©. Her fiancĂ© was quick to accuse her of cheating after what happened to her. He wouldnât hear her out. He didnât give her the chance to speak. He just screamed at her and then left. And Tyler, Amberâs best friend, raped her. And his parents are just shitty. The mom was in denial of what happened. She blamed Amber for what happened. And his father didnât support him when he confessed what happened to the cops. His parents are just shit!
What I noticed about the book is that it was published during a time when the Me Too movement was very popular. It was published around the time when the Me Too movement first began. I appreciate that a book like this was written because we need to spread awareness about sexual assault and rape. The more we talk about it, the more we understand what women are dealing with all the time. I mean, I donât think all/most books should be written about women being raped, but I think that itâs okay if some books are written about that.
Now the book gets a 3.5 because there were some black people in the story, which is very rare in books that are written about white people. I appreciate that there were some black characters. More books should have characters that are of African-American descent. And I think that there should be more of those type of characters in books that already have some black characters in it. I was originally going to give this book 3 stars, but gave it an extra half of a point for this reason. The authorâs done a good job with that.
What I noticed about the book is that it was published during a time when the Me Too movement was very popular. It was published around the time when the Me Too movement first began. I appreciate that a book like this was written because we need to spread awareness about sexual assault and rape. The more we talk about it, the more we understand what women are dealing with all the time. I mean, I donât think all/most books should be written about women being raped, but I think that itâs okay if some books are written about that.
Now the book gets a 3.5 because there were some black people in the story, which is very rare in books that are written about white people. I appreciate that there were some black characters. More books should have characters that are of African-American descent. And I think that there should be more of those type of characters in books that already have some black characters in it. I was originally going to give this book 3 stars, but gave it an extra half of a point for this reason. The authorâs done a good job with that.
shannanh's review against another edition
5.0
A story about an extremely difficult subject. Two friends and what happens when one has romantic feeling for the other and it's not reciprocated.
sherferguson's review against another edition
3.0
If I could, I'd give this a 3.5. Very engaging. Not the sappy chick-lit that the cover seemed to portray.
cynsfictionaddiction's review against another edition
5.0
The scariest thing about this book is the title â the fact that it really does happen all the time⊠The authorâs note in the very beginning was essential to pulling me into the story. Knowing that this wasnât just based on fact, but this was the author Amy Hatvanyâs personal journey made it that much more real.
âIt Happens All The Timeâ details the events leading up to and after main character Amber is raped by her best friend Tyler. The novel switches back and forth between each of their perspectives (which is very impressive considering how close the author is to this story). Nevertheless, she did a great job of making both characters flawed and sympathetic. I expected Tyler to be cast as more of a monster, but Amy stayed true to her characters and really developed the thoughtful, understanding friendship beneath the surface.
Tyler clearly grew up with very unhealthy views of women and sex. Despite not wanting to turn out like his father, sometimes you donât even realize how much that kind of upbringing actually sinks into your subconscious. While Tyler was adamant that he was in love with Amber, I think it was more obsessive than love-based. His inability to connect with others made him see Amber as âthe oneâ without really understanding how a healthy relationship should function.
On the flip side, Amber was engaged to another guy (Daniel) and still acting inappropriately flirtatious. She cheated on her fiancĂ©e by kissing Tyler before everything spun out of control. Weâve all done inappropriate or wrong things â especially when alcohol is involved, and even more so when alcohol is involved after an argument like Amber had had with Daniel right before going out. Her actions made Amberâs character more tangible. In the moment, Amber felt like she was in control and wasnât thinking about how easy it is for the tables to turn. Itâs such a fine line.
This novel was terrifyingly accurate and demonstrated how naturally and straightforwardly rape can happen. I felt for Tyler and understand that he got carried away with his emotions, but it doesnât change the reality of the situation and how it never should have happened.
I am fortunate enough to never have had an experience as horrifying as this, but when Iâm out having fun and drinking, I have definitely noticed how easy it is to get into this type of situation without even realizing whatâs happening until itâs too late. It worries me that it actually happens to so many who never speak up or get justice.
It is incredibly amazing that Amy Hatvany was brave enough to share her story. This is something that needs to be discussed. We canât just let these incidents and these women get swept under the rug out of fear or taboo. Amyâs story definitely had an impact on me, and I hope she is able to spur the kind of discussion and action that is so clearly needed in our society today.
https://thebookbasics.wordpress.com/
âIt Happens All The Timeâ details the events leading up to and after main character Amber is raped by her best friend Tyler. The novel switches back and forth between each of their perspectives (which is very impressive considering how close the author is to this story). Nevertheless, she did a great job of making both characters flawed and sympathetic. I expected Tyler to be cast as more of a monster, but Amy stayed true to her characters and really developed the thoughtful, understanding friendship beneath the surface.
Tyler clearly grew up with very unhealthy views of women and sex. Despite not wanting to turn out like his father, sometimes you donât even realize how much that kind of upbringing actually sinks into your subconscious. While Tyler was adamant that he was in love with Amber, I think it was more obsessive than love-based. His inability to connect with others made him see Amber as âthe oneâ without really understanding how a healthy relationship should function.
On the flip side, Amber was engaged to another guy (Daniel) and still acting inappropriately flirtatious. She cheated on her fiancĂ©e by kissing Tyler before everything spun out of control. Weâve all done inappropriate or wrong things â especially when alcohol is involved, and even more so when alcohol is involved after an argument like Amber had had with Daniel right before going out. Her actions made Amberâs character more tangible. In the moment, Amber felt like she was in control and wasnât thinking about how easy it is for the tables to turn. Itâs such a fine line.
This novel was terrifyingly accurate and demonstrated how naturally and straightforwardly rape can happen. I felt for Tyler and understand that he got carried away with his emotions, but it doesnât change the reality of the situation and how it never should have happened.
I am fortunate enough to never have had an experience as horrifying as this, but when Iâm out having fun and drinking, I have definitely noticed how easy it is to get into this type of situation without even realizing whatâs happening until itâs too late. It worries me that it actually happens to so many who never speak up or get justice.
It is incredibly amazing that Amy Hatvany was brave enough to share her story. This is something that needs to be discussed. We canât just let these incidents and these women get swept under the rug out of fear or taboo. Amyâs story definitely had an impact on me, and I hope she is able to spur the kind of discussion and action that is so clearly needed in our society today.
https://thebookbasics.wordpress.com/
carrielion143's review against another edition
2.0
I had high hopes for an acquaintance rape story told from both points of view. However, this fell into a preachy after school special rather than an compelling read. The narrative that the perpetrator must be mentally ill in order to rape is too easy an explanation.
courtthebookgirl's review against another edition
4.0
This book came highly recommended to me by a few friends, so I gave it a shot. Although I usually avoid books that include rape, I felt that this was an important read that is relevant to my work with sexual assault survivors. I really liked the way the story was told from alternating perspectives, as it lent itself well to getting "the whole truth" about the story. From my work with survivors, this felt like a really good portrayal of the way many of them feel after an acquaintance rape. There was one portion of the story that I thought was a little over the top, but it fit within the narrative arc and I understood the direction the author took. All in all, this was a great read- kept me up at night, and I hurried to finish it.
inliterarylove's review against another edition
5.0
While this is a work of fiction, there are millions of women (and men) who will be impacted by this book. The story of rape is not a new one, but Hatvany's take from both point of views is both gut wrenching and fascinating. Tyler and Amber were best friends. Best friends. And then one drunken night, well, it all went to shit. What follows is both sides of the story in the case of consent. That no means no, no matter who, what, when, where, or why. Emotionally wrenching, you won't be able to put this one down.