Reviews

Dirty River: A Queer Femme of Color Dreaming Her Way Home by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

decie's review against another edition

loan lapsed before my reading slump ended. definitely coming back to this one.

whatulysses's review against another edition

5.0

"It's not just about escaping a terrible childhood. It's about figuring one's way through a future that is beautiful and utterly unpredictable. Whether you choose safety or stick your thumb out, you are not guaranteed happiness or calm. You get bored of your husband. You stare hrorified at your eviction notice. It all falls apart, and then it is a miracle. We don't understand it. We make the same mistakes over and over again.

Stakes are high and nothing is certain--witness foreclosures and mudslides. Witness elders falling off the edge...

Let me tell you a story, darling kunju. It's the oldest one in the book, or before books. A girl runs away from home and tries to get free. On the way she takes a bus, hops a border, loses her hair, her clothes, her everything.

There are twists and turns, and you want to know, will she get out? Maybe she is you, the girl you were when you left home, stopped talking to your parents, were such a horrible daughter. You never could do anything right, could you? You did yourself right. You ran away. You were never seen again. You were a ghost girl floating around the city. Your spirit is a shred that hovers around these skyscrapers. She's still here. Even if you think they didn't see your body flaming, it was flaming. It was there. It's still there.

Kick the trike pedal. Push off. You can feel this wind rush between your legs. You're riding that baby-blue trike standing up, picking up speed down the big hill. Your hair streams out behind you, tits hard. The city spreads her legs in front of you--your city. Trees and the secret gardens and alleyways, the lake, the smoggy horizon, the CN Tower, Kensington, the jails and the big mall, the dirty river and the airport. New York, Oakland, Colombo, the world; you are getting on an airplane and taking the fuck off.

You ran away to find freedom, and you found it. You made it. Now you gotta tell it. You gotta figure out how to tell the story."

greginnature's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative inspiring fast-paced

4.25

shawcrit's review against another edition

5.0

Incredible, powerful book.

erinonthedaly's review against another edition

5.0

I wish I could give this book more than 5 stars. I had this on my to-read list for years, but I read it at the point in my life I most needed to. I was rooting for Leah from the start, in awe of a survivor story that takes the time to explain her/their whole self, ancestry and all, and what happens after trauma, who we become in all our versions. I love to feel the heartbeat of an author so fully connected to themselves and their truth in the moment of writing. This book does that. And also, it made me feel so seen. It's rare to find a text that explores what it means to be mixed race, diasporic girl grappling with the legacy of colonization that lives in our skin. The complexity of intergenerational mixing and the role of nation-building (e.g. Portuguese policies encouraging white colonists "marrying" locals) in forming isolated cultural communities are not often named. And then to connect Burgher culture to other colonies - like the Maquistas from Hong Kong and Macau...I need more of this kind of examination of erasure, history, and decolonial movement building with the potential to connect us. So grateful to Leah for the emotional processing it took to produce this work, for sharing her political consciousness, and showing me what a memoir can be. I know I'll be coming back to this text.

leeeeeeeeeeeeee's review

adventurous emotional hopeful reflective

5.0

knbd's review against another edition

5.0

This is one of the best books I've ever read. Couldn't put it down and then halfway thru had to so I could remind myself how to breathe. Holy shit

sheabutterfemme's review against another edition

5.0

I walked through New York with Leah, I organized, I fell in love, I ran away, I found my way back home.
I held my breath the entire time while reading this, it’s beautiful. Helped me fill the little Zami-sized hole in my heart.

moj8668's review against another edition

5.0

Immersive. You don't just read her story. The emotions and reactions leap off the page and grab your heart. Read. This. Book.

kittycatcat's review against another edition

5.0

Phenomenal.

Many big feels and moments of pause given to me from this book.

The following quote struck me so deeply:

Spoiler

“ I’ll tell you a secret. Sometimes I close my eyes and send all these pictures of my life back to the kid I was, who is still back there, trying to survive. Prayer is activism. I tell her: this is waiting, waiting. It doesn’t get better (but it did), it just changes. I pray to her, promise her, say, “Stay alive. This is what’s waiting for you. You will make it come to be.” (P228)