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miaaa_lenaaa's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
The writing in this was stunning, like so beautiful and gentle but then so vivid and violent
‘I feel guilty but I don't know how I've sinned.’
‘“I've learned how to ignore things for which there are no words. Without a name, nothing can exist.”’
‘France is an outfit I wear; Algeria is my skin, exposed to sun and storms.’
‘This photograph sums up my father - he's there but he's not really present, a prince with his crown in his hands, trying to keep it out of sight.’
‘Everything turns to blood, grime, mud, fire. An apocalypse. They are murdering my childhood.’
‘I want to be a magician, transform reality when it doesn't suit me, tell stories the way I like them, with happy endings.’
‘We stand tall on the swings, my sister and I, two birds in flight, unfettered, free.’
‘I'm not trying to put myself in danger, I just want to see how long it will take for someone to notice I've gone. I'll find out how much they love me.’
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction, Death, Drug use, Homophobia, Rape, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Murder, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Colonisation, and Injury/Injury detail
asainspace's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Interesting, readable and short work of autofiction. For me it could have benefitted from being longer and more developed - there was quite a lot of repetition and it ended in a rush.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child abuse, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexism, Sexual violence, Religious bigotry, Murder, Abandonment, and War
Moderate: Addiction and Drug abuse
Minor: Domestic abuse, Genocide, and Antisemitism
james1star's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Wow! Honestly this book totally blew me away, by page three I knew it was something special and at thirty three it became a new favourite of mine.
Bouraoui’s work of autofiction tells her story of being a lesbian in 1980s Paris exploring her sexuality and identity under the backdrop of a growing threat (AIDS) and a legacy of silence and shame within the queer community. This marks the ‘chapters’ (they’re tiny, none more then three pages) headed ‘Becoming’ with the others: ‘Remembering’ and ‘Knowing’ giving the reader insight into Nina’s childhood split between Algeria and France, where her Father and Mother are from respectively. There is rather minimal plot but you don’t read it for this, the poetic, lyrical, mesmerising, darn right beautiful prose pulls you in and refuses to let you go from page one right to the very end. The writing is so exquisite leaving me stunned on nearly every page, I underlined whilst reading and only about 70% is left untouched, that’s how amazing I found it. What I also loved was how relatable parts of this was, as a queer person reading this there was just a lot I could not only understand but wholeheartedly feel within me and for this I truly appreciate books you can see yourself in. The queer experience is only half of what’s encapsulated within, that if being an immigrant and having two nationalities/identities is so well articulated. Additionally, themes of friendships, relationships, family dynamics, motherhood, religion and politics, racism and so many more are discussed.
I could fill pages upon pages with quotes from this book but I’ll narrow it down so you have something to look forward to when you read it… because you must read this book. These are the best from the first thirty three pages, there’s a lot where this comes from:
‘In the gay community (I like these two words, they don’t do much belong to me as own me)…’
‘France is an outfit I wear; Algeria is my skin, exposed to sun and storms.’
‘There is such thing as a gay childhood. My childhood. No excuses are needed. There’s no explanation. It simply is.’
‘The gay child is not lacking, she is different, outside of the norm, inside a normality of her own; not until later will she come to understand that her normality marks her out from others, condemns her to secrecy and shame.’
Bouraoui’s work of autofiction tells her story of being a lesbian in 1980s Paris exploring her sexuality and identity under the backdrop of a growing threat (AIDS) and a legacy of silence and shame within the queer community. This marks the ‘chapters’ (they’re tiny, none more then three pages) headed ‘Becoming’ with the others: ‘Remembering’ and ‘Knowing’ giving the reader insight into Nina’s childhood split between Algeria and France, where her Father and Mother are from respectively. There is rather minimal plot but you don’t read it for this, the poetic, lyrical, mesmerising, darn right beautiful prose pulls you in and refuses to let you go from page one right to the very end. The writing is so exquisite leaving me stunned on nearly every page, I underlined whilst reading and only about 70% is left untouched, that’s how amazing I found it. What I also loved was how relatable parts of this was, as a queer person reading this there was just a lot I could not only understand but wholeheartedly feel within me and for this I truly appreciate books you can see yourself in. The queer experience is only half of what’s encapsulated within, that if being an immigrant and having two nationalities/identities is so well articulated. Additionally, themes of friendships, relationships, family dynamics, motherhood, religion and politics, racism and so many more are discussed.
I could fill pages upon pages with quotes from this book but I’ll narrow it down so you have something to look forward to when you read it… because you must read this book. These are the best from the first thirty three pages, there’s a lot where this comes from:
‘In the gay community (I like these two words, they don’t do much belong to me as own me)…’
‘France is an outfit I wear; Algeria is my skin, exposed to sun and storms.’
‘There is such thing as a gay childhood. My childhood. No excuses are needed. There’s no explanation. It simply is.’
‘The gay child is not lacking, she is different, outside of the norm, inside a normality of her own; not until later will she come to understand that her normality marks her out from others, condemns her to secrecy and shame.’
Content Warnings
Moderate: Homophobia, Racism, Violence, Sexual harassment, and War
Minor: Addiction, Alcoholism, Bullying, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Misogyny, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Antisemitism, Islamophobia, Grief, Religious bigotry, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Lesbophobia, and Colonisation
bookishpip's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
This is a short book that I picked up on account of its interesting premise. It’s semi-autobiographical and moves between different points in time; very short chapters titled ‘Remembering’ (recollecting childhood), ‘Knowing’ (insights into characters) ‘Becoming’ (more recent past, focused around the gay bar she visits and the people she sees) and finally ‘Being’.
On paper, this book seemed exactly my kind of thing. But for some reason it just didn’t hit the mark with me. Characters didn’t seem very well developed, so even when major things happened to them, it didn’t seem shocking or important.
Moreover, even though the novel was mostly about the protagonist/author coming to terms with her homosexuality (which naturally involves some self-criticism), some of the ways in which important themes were tackled were a bit uncomfortable - in particular, the attack of the protagonist’s mother. It wasn’t necessarily the language or the content - just something about the way it was handled felt inauthentic in a way I’m struggling to verbalise.
Overall, I think I’m missing the point with this book, and I’m disappointed by it. Hopefully you enjoy it better if you read it!
On paper, this book seemed exactly my kind of thing. But for some reason it just didn’t hit the mark with me. Characters didn’t seem very well developed, so even when major things happened to them, it didn’t seem shocking or important.
Moreover, even though the novel was mostly about the protagonist/author coming to terms with her homosexuality (which naturally involves some self-criticism), some of the ways in which important themes were tackled were a bit uncomfortable - in particular, the attack of the protagonist’s mother. It wasn’t necessarily the language or the content - just something about the way it was handled felt inauthentic in a way I’m struggling to verbalise.
Overall, I think I’m missing the point with this book, and I’m disappointed by it. Hopefully you enjoy it better if you read it!
Content Warnings
Minor: Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Homophobia, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, and Suicide