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emfass's review against another edition
Did not finish the various chapters in time for book club. Better read with my eyeballs, I think. Hard for me to absorb the info through audio.
crystalmidnightmumslibrary's review
4.0
Helpful read. Would recommends all couples and therapists working with couples to read this. Especially if unpacking religious trauma.
secretchoochoo's review against another edition
3.0
A great book that emphasizes the need for communication, deliberateness, and empathy. Unfortunately the book tends to echo and could likely have been 30-50% shorter so I only give it 3 stars.
i_read_big_boucs's review
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
relaxing
medium-paced
5.0
I felt so touched by this book. It was such a humanist outlook.
The main argument of this book is that to have better experiences, we have to redefine what we are calling "sex". I was feeling quite sad and insecure about my desires and whether it fitted with what other people counted as 'sex' and expected from me. It was so insanely comforting and relaxing to hear: it doesn't matter what you do, magnificent sex is about how you show up. The descriptions I read reminded me so much of dancing with a partner: being present, knowing exactly where to go, just feeling happy to be there, feeling together. That's what I want, not a series of acts, and it was so affirming to read that my preferences were valid.
I think it was such a humanistic perspective on "low desire" as well. The book says, well, maybe sometimes low desire is simply proof of good judgement. What would make sex worth wanting for you?
And such a beautiful perspective on sexuality at an old age! Makes you want to be old, haha. Breaks out of the social narrative that the only people who have great sex are the conventionally attractive and able-bodied.
The main argument of this book is that to have better experiences, we have to redefine what we are calling "sex". I was feeling quite sad and insecure about my desires and whether it fitted with what other people counted as 'sex' and expected from me. It was so insanely comforting and relaxing to hear: it doesn't matter what you do, magnificent sex is about how you show up. The descriptions I read reminded me so much of dancing with a partner: being present, knowing exactly where to go, just feeling happy to be there, feeling together. That's what I want, not a series of acts, and it was so affirming to read that my preferences were valid.
I think it was such a humanistic perspective on "low desire" as well. The book says, well, maybe sometimes low desire is simply proof of good judgement. What would make sex worth wanting for you?
And such a beautiful perspective on sexuality at an old age! Makes you want to be old, haha. Breaks out of the social narrative that the only people who have great sex are the conventionally attractive and able-bodied.