Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'

Detransition, Baby by Torrey Peters

169 reviews

atuin's review against another edition

challenging dark funny medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

A fascinating exploration of trans identity and relationships. This book focuses heavily on deeply flawed characters (especially Reese). Every character does deeply frustrating actions that nevertheless feel perfectly in character. There is discussion on how characters feel they must conform to certain stereotypes in order to validate their own gender identity, and the harm it does to them and the people they are close to. The ambiguous ending is indicative of the fact the book has no true answers to the many problems found within, and we, like the characters, have no choice but to try to figure out what solution is most fitting with the characters. 

Spoiler

In particular, Reese became frustrating with her self destructive behavior and her refusal to learn from her mistakes, constantly doing the same thing over and over while refusing to accept responsibility. Even at the end she only felt bad about a mean letter, not the cheating or emotional abuse she committed. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Homophobia, Infidelity, Sexism, Sexual content, and Transphobia

Moderate: Toxic friendship, Toxic relationship, Suicide attempt, Emotional abuse, and Physical abuse

Spoiler

One of the Main characters, Reese, cheats on her partner multiple times, and later on cheats again with a married man.

Spoiler

rjbedell's review

medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Transphobia, Pregnancy, Homophobia, Sexual content, Outing, Suicide attempt, Toxic relationship, and Infidelity

Moderate: Violence, Injury/Injury detail, and Deadnaming

Minor: Death, Abortion, and Stalking

maeverose's review against another edition

Maybe I’ll revisit this someday?

It just wasn’t really what I was expecting. I’m not exactly sure what I was expecting. The main characters are very messy people who make questionable decisions, which on one hand is nice to see because it allows trans people to be messy and human just like everyone else without the expectation of perfect representation, but on the other hand, I don’t really care to read about Reese’s questionable sex life for a huge chunk of the book (well, the beginning at least). I feel like all I know about her is she’s trans, has terrible taste in men and little self worth. I also (as a childfree person) really didn’t like how the characters were going about the whole parenting thing. I stopped somewhere in the middle of chapter two, but the way Katrina was like ‘I’m only having the baby if I have a co parent’ made me feel like she didn’t actually want a baby and should probably just get the abortion. As well as Ames using the pregnancy seemingly just as an excuse to kind of get back together with Reese in a way. It bothers me so much seeing people become parents for stupid reasons, and the characters in this book were all way too messy to care for a child, and two of them didn’t even seem like they wanted to.

I have no objective issues with the book, it’s just not for me.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Misogyny, Pregnancy, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Sexual content, and Infidelity

Moderate: Miscarriage, Physical abuse, Gore, and Animal death

Minor: Abortion, Infertility, Antisemitism, and Racism

The gore is just animal gore, at least as far as I read

lanid's review

emotional reflective

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Outing, Transphobia, Infidelity, and Sexual content

Moderate: Abortion, Adult/minor relationship, Deadnaming, Dysphoria, Body shaming, and Domestic abuse

Minor: Misogyny, Miscarriage, Sexual violence, Suicide attempt, and Pregnancy

hi_its_micah's review

challenging emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Infidelity

Moderate: Outing

Minor: Abortion

aliciae08's review against another edition

emotional hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.75

I just finished Detransition, Baby, and I’m still sussing out my thoughts.

The conclusion I’ve come up with is complicated—as it should be, as the characters are complicated. 

What I loved:

• the exploration of womanhood, motherhood, gender expression and queerness;
• The imperfectness of the characters so that the reader knew that no one person’s identity is monolithic. It is entirely one’s own;
• The idea that we can create our own family
• The exploration of why the characters are the way that they are (especially Ames).  

What I didn’t like:

• Others have mentioned the clumsiness of race within this, and how the inclusion of Katrina being the one major character of color might be a metaphor for how the white trans experience isn’t the only one.  It doesn’t work for me fir so many reasons, but the first one being that whenever she brings race up it feels like someone who hasn’t actually experienced being a minority, and because any attempts at relating with Katrina by Reese/Ames are shut down.  
• Some of the writing, as beautiful as it is, was over the top for me.  I was sometimes waiting to get to the end of a chapter and I hate feeling like that. 

What I found challenging:

• Reese said things about womanhood and the need to feel delicate (particularly when she was with Stanley and the Cowboy) that I wholeheartedly couldn’t relate to, but have to admit that at some point in my own life defined my own perception of what it means to be woman and the need for men to view me as someone worthy of being taken care of/defended etc. I think it’s easy for people (especially those looking for an excuse to hate this book) to use it as a way to accuse people like Reese, at worse, of cosplaying womanhood, when that’s not what’s happening. 
• Ames’, before their transition to Amy, misogyny and further internalized misogyny was hard to read, mostly because I grieved for that character. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Outing, Misogyny, Transphobia, Suicide attempt, Infidelity, Dysphoria, Miscarriage, Suicide, and Pregnancy

sorcha's review against another edition

emotional funny hopeful reflective sad

3.75

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic relationship, Infidelity, Sexual content, and Outing

Moderate: Suicide attempt, Dysphoria, Blood, Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Suicide, Abortion, Death, Injury/Injury detail, Infertility, and Transphobia

megelizabeth's review against another edition

slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character

2.5

The positive thing I have to say about this book is that it's interesting. It's slow and it took me a while to get through, but it contains a lot of great observations, conversations, and themes, and definitely made me think more deeply about a plethora of aspects of the trans experience. Of course, it looks a lot also at the detrans experience, and gives a really compelling insight into what detransition can mean in reality.

However, I did struggle with this book because it's very much character-driven and I really didn't connect to or particularly like any of the main characters. I'm sure they're supposed to be viewed through a critical lens, but that knowledge didn't help me during the many insufferable parts, the plot and the themes not being enough to make me appreciate the characters also. I also can't not mention the fact that this book contains a graphic depiction of underage sex, which there's literally no reason or excuse for; the points being made about the character involved could easily have been done so without including this. To a lesser, but still frustrating, degree, there's also an odd comment about hysterectomies being 'widely available', which again was maybe supposed to be viewed critically, but surely didn't come off that way.

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Miscarriage, Violence, and Transphobia

Moderate: Abortion, Infidelity, Homophobia, Blood, Drug use, and Death

Minor: Racism and Suicide

kyrstin_p1989's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.5

While interesting, I really struggled to get into this book. In part, I think it was the way it was written — the back and forth between characters and time periods made the book feel choppy and disconnected. The entire time I was reading, I never fell into the story. It just felt like I was reading — not experiencing it. The insights about being trans were the highlight for me. I felt deep sorrow for the characters who wanted so deeply to be themselves in ways society or biology would not allow. 

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Car accident, Emotional abuse, Racial slurs, Blood, Medical content, Misogyny, Miscarriage, Sexual content, Transphobia, Body horror, Body shaming, Homophobia, Abandonment, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, Lesbophobia, Toxic relationship, Biphobia, Pregnancy, Death, Suicide, Sexual harassment, Bullying, Outing, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Sexual violence, Abortion, Death of parent, Infidelity, and Sexism

lily_peach's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

---

Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic friendship, Toxic relationship, Infidelity, and Violence

Moderate: Transphobia, Racism, Outing, Homophobia, Sexual content, Suicide, and Suicide attempt

Minor: Body shaming