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carolined314's review
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
A hard story about brainwashing, dependence, privilege, debt.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Confinement, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Torture, Toxic relationship, Gaslighting, Abandonment, and Classism
Moderate: Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicidal thoughts, Forced institutionalization, Medical content, Dementia, Grief, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, and Dysphoria
Minor: Excrement
18soft_green's review
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.25
I’m spilling the beans. I’ll try to hide the spoilers but I think this book could have done better with the trigger warnings. And I think readers should actually get to know exactly what they’re getting into.
Okay, so when I put a hold on this book I knew it was an analogy for how there is no true consent under capitalism. That’s actually why I wanted to read it as I am a leftist. This book challenged me to say the least. It challenged my ethics and my boundaries and view lelfists. But not the way I think the author wanted, I think.
This book is pretty outspoken in that it will contain themes of rape. I wanted to read the story because I recognized that the author is a leftist and generally, of so I thought, leftists are pretty educated and thoughtful about topics like racism, feminism, and sexual assault/harassment. Before listening to this book I, as a writer, had the strong belief that there is no ethical reason for a book to contain a graphic rape scene. Maybe a scene where the sex doesn’t go as planned but when it comes to actual rape, you can tell a story where rape happens and include some details without writing the scene. I am open to being corrected or finding exceptions to the rule always. If you give me a better/more accurate perspective I will change my mind. That’s why I read this.
As a survivor of rape, repeated rape, I am knowledgeable and sensitive to this subject. I have been a support to friends, partners, and family who have suffered sexual assault/harassment and I’ve done a fuck-ton of research and personal healing. And I hate this book.
I put off writing a review for it for months because I was trying to find a more objective view of it. It hasn’t worked. As time passed I’ve only become more upset with it. It makes me angry.
Here’s my perspective: if you, as an author, need to process something personal and you best do that by putting it in a narrative, do it. I do this all the time because I’m a big thinker and sometimes giving my struggle to someone else (fictionally) and watching them process it helps me to see the situation in a new light and have grace for myself. So if this is what the author needed to do, awesome, I’m glad they’re processing their shit instead of keeping it locked up. But they should not have published it. I think a lot of people forget that oversharing isn’t just harmful to the person oversharing. The people that are getting this information they did not ask for are being harmed and not just because it makes them uncomfortable. It’s invasive! It takes energy to process they might have needed for other things. It forces them into a relationship dynamic they did not consent to. But wait, I didn’t have to read this book. I knew it was going to be challenging and could have put it down any time I wanted, right? Yes?
But it wasn’t just the tale that made this book shit. It was the characters, the plot, the way the rape was treated by the author. The author tries sympathizing with Alex, the abuser. I remember listening to Alex’s pov and wondering if the author was trying to convince me that rich abusers are just people doing the best they can. I was listening, and thinking, wait, you don’t think this is legit real do you? Rich people don’t think this way. Rapists don’t think this way. And even if they did, Alex’s actions still caused harm and they aren’t going to be absolved because he regrets it and apologized. He’s still guilty. Elijah, in my opinion, is fucking annoying. I think it’s just his personality that clashed with mine. What happened to him is unforgivable and his emotional response to it makes psychological sense and, I think, is fitting to his personality. What I hate more than anything is how the story is set up like Alex and Elijah are meant to be together. You can’t come back from abuse like that. Ever. You are, for life, changed and your relationship dynamic is completely destroyed. Even with therapy and boundaries and working to become better people. Your love for each other is tainted, you can’t start fresh because that harm changes who you are permanently and affects all of your relationships not to mention the one which gave you that trauma in the first place.
Then there’s the revolution movement and this part containsThe only thing I have to say here is that there were some spies playing dociles and masters and once one of those dociles raped Elijah at a party in front of everyone and when Elijah confronts the bitch he says he’d do it again because he’s so loyal to the movement and idk if the author was pointing out how ruthless some people are or thinking that for fhd revolution you must be prepared to commit any atrocity ✊🏻 It doesn’t help that that character would openly hit on Elijah and they started a fuck buddy arrangement later on. Like, this could speak to how fucking destroyed Elijah’s sense of self and agency is because of his experience with Alex but… it also bothers me that no one helping Elijah actually knew how to help him. Which is weird because we’ve figured out how to do this already. It requires professionals but like, the leftist movement has people from all walks of life in it and those who have been victims of abuse and well educated tend to be leftist so what the hell?!
The story didn’t end with someone, if not Elijah, killing Alex violently. That would have been the only acceptable ending. There is no way for him to redeem himself. I don’t care if he loves Elijah or not, he doesn’t get any more chances. As a rich person he’s already a parasite and thus a danger to society, we don’t need to add in his affects on those within his general facility.
Lastly, it’s not written that well. Like, it’s barebones type writing. Academic essay type writing. I was bored while also being triggered (which is partially my fault for not respecting my own boundary). There is no justifiable reason to include a graphic rape scene. Not even for the leftist cause. Yes there is no consent under capitalism and rape is a good metaphor. You don’t need to write the rape to use that analogy. And you most definitely don’t need to hand it over to the general public to consume.
1.25/5 stars. Would not recommend to anyone ever. Don’t hurt yourself with this book, it’s not worth it.
Okay, so when I put a hold on this book I knew it was an analogy for how there is no true consent under capitalism. That’s actually why I wanted to read it as I am a leftist. This book challenged me to say the least. It challenged my ethics and my boundaries and view lelfists. But not the way I think the author wanted, I think.
This book is pretty outspoken in that it will contain themes of rape. I wanted to read the story because I recognized that the author is a leftist and generally, of so I thought, leftists are pretty educated and thoughtful about topics like racism, feminism, and sexual assault/harassment. Before listening to this book I, as a writer, had the strong belief that there is no ethical reason for a book to contain a graphic rape scene. Maybe a scene where the sex doesn’t go as planned but when it comes to actual rape, you can tell a story where rape happens and include some details without writing the scene. I am open to being corrected or finding exceptions to the rule always. If you give me a better/more accurate perspective I will change my mind. That’s why I read this.
As a survivor of rape, repeated rape, I am knowledgeable and sensitive to this subject. I have been a support to friends, partners, and family who have suffered sexual assault/harassment and I’ve done a fuck-ton of research and personal healing. And I hate this book.
I put off writing a review for it for months because I was trying to find a more objective view of it. It hasn’t worked. As time passed I’ve only become more upset with it. It makes me angry.
Here’s my perspective: if you, as an author, need to process something personal and you best do that by putting it in a narrative, do it. I do this all the time because I’m a big thinker and sometimes giving my struggle to someone else (fictionally) and watching them process it helps me to see the situation in a new light and have grace for myself. So if this is what the author needed to do, awesome, I’m glad they’re processing their shit instead of keeping it locked up. But they should not have published it. I think a lot of people forget that oversharing isn’t just harmful to the person oversharing. The people that are getting this information they did not ask for are being harmed and not just because it makes them uncomfortable. It’s invasive! It takes energy to process they might have needed for other things. It forces them into a relationship dynamic they did not consent to. But wait, I didn’t have to read this book. I knew it was going to be challenging and could have put it down any time I wanted, right? Yes?
But it wasn’t just the tale that made this book shit. It was the characters, the plot, the way the rape was treated by the author. The author tries sympathizing with Alex, the abuser. I remember listening to Alex’s pov and wondering if the author was trying to convince me that rich abusers are just people doing the best they can. I was listening, and thinking, wait, you don’t think this is legit real do you? Rich people don’t think this way. Rapists don’t think this way. And even if they did, Alex’s actions still caused harm and they aren’t going to be absolved because he regrets it and apologized. He’s still guilty. Elijah, in my opinion, is fucking annoying. I think it’s just his personality that clashed with mine. What happened to him is unforgivable and his emotional response to it makes psychological sense and, I think, is fitting to his personality. What I hate more than anything is how the story is set up like Alex and Elijah are meant to be together. You can’t come back from abuse like that. Ever. You are, for life, changed and your relationship dynamic is completely destroyed. Even with therapy and boundaries and working to become better people. Your love for each other is tainted, you can’t start fresh because that harm changes who you are permanently and affects all of your relationships not to mention the one which gave you that trauma in the first place.
Then there’s the revolution movement and this part contains
The story didn’t end with someone, if not Elijah, killing Alex violently. That would have been the only acceptable ending. There is no way for him to redeem himself. I don’t care if he loves Elijah or not, he doesn’t get any more chances. As a rich person he’s already a parasite and thus a danger to society, we don’t need to add in his affects on those within his general facility.
Lastly, it’s not written that well. Like, it’s barebones type writing. Academic essay type writing. I was bored while also being triggered (which is partially my fault for not respecting my own boundary). There is no justifiable reason to include a graphic rape scene. Not even for the leftist cause. Yes there is no consent under capitalism and rape is a good metaphor. You don’t need to write the rape to use that analogy. And you most definitely don’t need to hand it over to the general public to consume.
1.25/5 stars. Would not recommend to anyone ever. Don’t hurt yourself with this book, it’s not worth it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body horror, Body shaming, Chronic illness, Confinement, Domestic abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Torture, Toxic relationship, Dementia, Suicide attempt, and Classism
Moderate: Death, Eating disorder, Hate crime, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, Sexual content, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Medical content, Gaslighting, Alcohol, Colonisation, and Deportation
Minor: Body shaming, Blood, Vomit, Kidnapping, Stalking, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Colonisation, War, Injury/Injury detail, and Deportation
lamegod's review
dark
emotional
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Confinement, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Slavery, Toxic relationship, Trafficking, and Classism
Moderate: Drug use, Torture, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, and Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Chronic illness, Cursing, Drug use, Suicide, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Medical content, Grief, Medical trauma, Death of parent, Toxic friendship, and Alcohol
yourlocallibrarian's review
challenging
dark
emotional
mysterious
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Confinement, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Suicide attempt, Injury/Injury detail, and Classism
time_travel_tragedy's review
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
This book was very well written I give it that. I absolutely loved how it explores the capitalist aspects of this book. It was very well done. And most of what he wrote in terms of the exploration of healthy relationships and consent were really well done. It was such a compelling read, and it had really strong messaging throughout 90% of the book, which is why I rated it so high. However, of course it falls short.
I think he undermines his entire book with the last chapter. You went through all of that, to throw all of it away for a traditional happy ending??? I feel like he really did break a lot of ground with this book, and he could have had a happy, satisfying ending, but he throws part of the messaging in the trash with the last chapter. I don't know if he was pressured into it or what, but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The main character went through so much to find himself, and then backslides backwards to more than likely lose himself again.
I thought the "sex" scenes were a little to graphic for my taste, but I don't fault the book for that and even some of them aid in telling the story K. M. Szpara is trying to tell, and helps get his message across. That's not why I took off 1.75 stars. It was almost a five star book. But the main character goes through so much. And there are parts where it is flat out stated that a part of what he goes through is rape. But also many where it is almost forgotten? And the ending?? Like if you have no choice, you can't consent. And even in the acknowledgements the author calls them sex scenes. And I'm like sir, I thought part of the thesis of the book is that it's not sex because sex requires consent, which under the circumstances, he couldn't give??
I also just don't know how going through everything he goes through, he can just forgive the guy that has the biggest hand in it aside from the "sex"?? It just doesn't sit right with me. I was really hoping this book wasn't going to play out with the ending of forgiving the abuser, which is essentially what the forgiven party was. Basically the last chapter pretty much goes against everything the rest of the book stands for. I understand that it is a very systemic issue. But that doesn't mean Elisha has to forgive shit. The other guy can work on himself and do better and change to help the rest of society. And that's a great message. The other guy gets to go and make a better man out of himself. Elisha gets to go and figure out who he is and who he wants to be. And gets to be happy outside of his abuser. The message being "Yes, the other guy should be allowed to continue on in society and improve himself and help others. BUT Elisha doesn't and probably shouldn't allow him to stay in his life just because the other guy changed. It's too late the damage is done, and it was damning." Just my two scents.
I think he undermines his entire book with the last chapter. You went through all of that, to throw all of it away for a traditional happy ending??? I feel like he really did break a lot of ground with this book, and he could have had a happy, satisfying ending, but he throws part of the messaging in the trash with the last chapter. I don't know if he was pressured into it or what, but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The main character went through so much to find himself, and then backslides backwards to more than likely lose himself again.
I thought the "sex" scenes were a little to graphic for my taste, but I don't fault the book for that and even some of them aid in telling the story K. M. Szpara is trying to tell, and helps get his message across. That's not why I took off 1.75 stars. It was almost a five star book. But the main character goes through so much. And there are parts where it is flat out stated that a part of what he goes through is rape. But also many where it is almost forgotten? And the ending?? Like if you have no choice, you can't consent. And even in the acknowledgements the author calls them sex scenes. And I'm like sir, I thought part of the thesis of the book is that it's not sex because sex requires consent, which under the circumstances, he couldn't give??
Content Warnings
Graphic: Confinement, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Rape, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, and Suicide attempt
Moderate: Gaslighting
Minor: Classism
shock_adelica's review
dark
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Forced institutionalization, Suicide attempt, and Classism
ohanaaa's review
challenging
dark
mysterious
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
This book is incredibly difficult for me to review. Therefore, this is going to be long...
I found this book in my local library's online catalog, and was interested in the book cover's description of the story. I had concluded it to be a story about what happens when capitalism swallows people in debt and what they may be willing to do to erase said debt, including "selling themselves" off to a high bidder, labeled "disturbingly sexy" and "an intricate exploration of power, privilege, and class dynamics". I was intrigued. Plus, the cover was STUNNING. Without much thought, I checked out this book.
It wasn't until I checked the G.R. (goodreads) reviews afterwards that I learned about the dark themes of this book, alongside the critiques given about this book's non-existent mention of race or history of slavery in America. I will recommend reading other reviews such as this, or others reviews by BIPOC readers for more information/better discussion (since I'm white and want to amplify the proper voices).
But, as you can tell, I sat down and read it. In full transparency of my experience with this book, I binged all of it in the matter of 24 hours. I was hooked right from the beginning of the story. The suspense and tension held me in a chokehold, and I wasn't upset about that. I very quickly felt swallowed up in the storytelling, the language, the character development... it was a feast. From beginning to conclusion, this book felt satisfying in its pacing, twists, and attention to detail. To put it simply, it was addictive and I had an incredibly hard time setting it down. While the only issue I had with this book was the graphic sex scenes (sometimes they were a bit much for me)... overall, in a strange way, it was one of the best books I've read so far this year.
That doesn't mean that the book sits well with me. In a way, I understand that that may be the point. It isn't MEANT to sit well with readers. Within the story alone, there were a lot of dark and triggering themes explored such as: rape (plus dubcon), attempted suicide, torture, trauma, etc. Due to some traumatic experiences of my own, I found myself relating to some of the discussion in this book revolving around consent, respect of boundaries, and also guilt that comes with sometimes enjoying things you know you shouldn't. Part of that, I believe, is why I got even more engrossed within the storyline: connection. Although his experiences are far worse than what I have experienced, I still understand the feeling of guilt and blurred lines. I was luckily able to handle this content, but I HIGHLY stress to check the triggers if you plan to pick this book up.
Would I recommend this book? If you've glanced at the list of warnings and understand the content this book does and does NOT include (I'm very glad I read the reviews on G.R. before diving in), I would recommend it at your own risk. However, I also feel a little stuck and conflicted over giving this book a recommendation due to the nature and lack-of-history. It's complicated.
I found this book in my local library's online catalog, and was interested in the book cover's description of the story. I had concluded it to be a story about what happens when capitalism swallows people in debt and what they may be willing to do to erase said debt, including "selling themselves" off to a high bidder, labeled "disturbingly sexy" and "an intricate exploration of power, privilege, and class dynamics". I was intrigued. Plus, the cover was STUNNING. Without much thought, I checked out this book.
It wasn't until I checked the G.R. (goodreads) reviews afterwards that I learned about the dark themes of this book, alongside the critiques given about this book's non-existent mention of race or history of slavery in America. I will recommend reading other reviews such as this, or others reviews by BIPOC readers for more information/better discussion (since I'm white and want to amplify the proper voices).
But, as you can tell, I sat down and read it. In full transparency of my experience with this book, I binged all of it in the matter of 24 hours. I was hooked right from the beginning of the story. The suspense and tension held me in a chokehold, and I wasn't upset about that. I very quickly felt swallowed up in the storytelling, the language, the character development... it was a feast. From beginning to conclusion, this book felt satisfying in its pacing, twists, and attention to detail. To put it simply, it was addictive and I had an incredibly hard time setting it down. While the only issue I had with this book was the graphic sex scenes (sometimes they were a bit much for me)... overall, in a strange way, it was one of the best books I've read so far this year.
That doesn't mean that the book sits well with me. In a way, I understand that that may be the point. It isn't MEANT to sit well with readers. Within the story alone, there were a lot of dark and triggering themes explored such as: rape (plus dubcon), attempted suicide, torture, trauma, etc. Due to some traumatic experiences of my own, I found myself relating to some of the discussion in this book revolving around consent, respect of boundaries, and also guilt that comes with sometimes enjoying things you know you shouldn't. Part of that, I believe, is why I got even more engrossed within the storyline: connection. Although his experiences are far worse than what I have experienced, I still understand the feeling of guilt and blurred lines. I was luckily able to handle this content, but I HIGHLY stress to check the triggers if you plan to pick this book up.
Would I recommend this book? If you've glanced at the list of warnings and understand the content this book does and does NOT include (I'm very glad I read the reviews on G.R. before diving in), I would recommend it at your own risk. However, I also feel a little stuck and conflicted over giving this book a recommendation due to the nature and lack-of-history. It's complicated.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Slavery, Toxic relationship, and Suicide attempt
Moderate: Confinement, Drug use, Sexual harassment, and Classism
Minor: Forced institutionalization and Blood
soljovis's review against another edition
challenging
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
2.0
It was probably so easy for Alex to brainwash Elisha because he didn’t have a personality to begin with.
Rated 2 stars because at least I wasn’t bored.
Obvious consent issues are obvious so here’s all the rest of my questions: Why set this in Baltimore but ignore all the racial implications. Why name the only prominent black character Onyx and, speaking of Onyx, why did he think it was a good idea to introduce a sexually traumatized man (who he had a hand in sexually traumatizing) to bdsm. Why not at least try therapy first. Why was the second half of this a trial that’s such a fanfic thing to do. Why did they cure the mom so quickly when half their plan was exposing what the drug did to her, and also how did they develop this cure in like a week. Why did they suddenly care at the end whether or not she was mentally capable of signing over her debt this came out of nowhere. Why did Elisha’s dad suck so bad. Why did the ODR lady’s name change to Carol halfway through the book I swear it was Candace at one point. What is the correct content warning tag for making someone kneel on rice.
Rated 2 stars because at least I wasn’t bored.
Obvious consent issues are obvious so here’s all the rest of my questions: Why set this in Baltimore but ignore all the racial implications. Why name the only prominent black character Onyx and, speaking of Onyx, why did he think it was a good idea to introduce a sexually traumatized man (who he had a hand in sexually traumatizing) to bdsm. Why not at least try therapy first. Why was the second half of this a trial that’s such a fanfic thing to do. Why did they cure the mom so quickly when half their plan was exposing what the drug did to her, and also how did they develop this cure in like a week. Why did they suddenly care at the end whether or not she was mentally capable of signing over her debt this came out of nowhere. Why did Elisha’s dad suck so bad. Why did the ODR lady’s name change to Carol halfway through the book I swear it was Candace at one point. What is the correct content warning tag for making someone kneel on rice.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Slavery, Suicide attempt, and Classism
Moderate: Confinement, Physical abuse, and Torture
ktrecs's review against another edition
Content Warnings
Graphic: Confinement, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Slavery, Torture, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Alcohol, Sexual harassment, and Classism
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