Reviews with content warning for Racism - Finding Me: A Memoir

"Every January, we had our Martin Luther King celebration, a variety show [...] it was our rebellion. We were told it would ruin our instrument. Well, our soul was our instrument, too."

I love Annalise MF Keating, but I didn't know too much about Viola Davis. In Finding Me, Viola talks less about her career as an actress and more about the systemic poverty and racism and the coinciding internalized struggles that she had to overcome to be the woman we know today. And she doesn't hold anything back.

She talks a lot about what society deems beautiful, worthy, or correct. During her time at Juiliard, students were discouraged from hosting an MLK Day program or anything that might highlight their differences from their white counterparts. She talks about the typecast roles that she would be cast in or invited to audition for. She talks about what it was like to be called beautiful for the first time. She talks about therapy.

In the end, she talks about finding herself, writing, "I am no longer ashamed of me."

I will never know firsthand what it's like to experience the abject poverty and racism that Viola grew up with. And that's why it's so important to read about. When she talked about being called beautiful for the first time, I started to wonder, when was the last time I told somebody they were pretty? When was the last time I told a woman of color that she was beautiful? When was the last time I supported a black-owned café instead of just picking up a latte at my local Tim Hortons? When did I last show kindness to a stranger?

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mattylovesbooks's review

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dark emotional inspiring sad tense medium-paced

4.5

“Memories are immortal. They’re deathless and precise. They have the power of giving you joy and perspective in hard times. Or, they can strangle you. Define you in a way that’s based more in other people’s fucked-up perceptions than truth.”

Amazing story. It was sad, heartbreaking, and hard to read at times. Everything her mother, her family, she herself went through, it was unfathomable. How can a human survive that level or poverty and abuse? Somehow, Viola and her family did. It was inspiring. To see where she came from shows her resilience, hard work, and dedication. It really makes you take a step back and reevaluate. She's so strong, and I have an abundance of respect and adoration for her. She didn't give up, and look where she is now. She is an amazing woman, a phenomenal actor. Finding Me was eye-opening, and definitely made me want to read more memoirs/autobiographies. There were so many good quotes, but the one above is my favorite.

Would've been a five star if not for the editing. I think this could've been structured better. Some things felt out of place and not cohesive. But all in all, a great read.

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lucyduller's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful inspiring reflective slow-paced

5.0

If you’re fed up of discussions about the royal family and the books coming out recently, please please pick up this one. It is simply fantastic.

*Please check trigger warnings before reading this book*

This is hands down the best audiobook I’ve listened to. I can imagine it was a fantastic book to read, but having it performed to you by an Emmy, Tony and Oscar winning actress, was an unmatchable experience. Viola Davis has such a fantastic voice, and the way she told her story was so moving.

In this book she recounts her life, from growing up in poverty, battling food insecurity and in a household filled with domestic violence of her mother from her father and the sexual abuse she received from her brother. She describes the reality of sexual abuse that she faced as a child, and as an adult and how she was able to overcome some of the behaviours she had accepted.

I was entranced for the whole 9 hours. I usually listen to audiobooks at 1.2x speed, as a lot of the readers are quite slow. But this book I listened to at normal speed and I savoured every minute of it.

Viola Davis recounts her experiences becoming an actress and how her upbringing informed how she went about achieving her dreams, going to Julliard and becoming an award-winning actress. She details the battles she faced in finding roles that were deemed suitable for a dark-skinned black woman, often those being best friend characters or addict mothers.

Most poignant was her discussions about her relationship with herself, the way from the age of 8 years old she thought she was worth nothing. She resented being black and this she carried with her into her adulthood. But after years of therapy and life experience, she learnt how to embrace herself, at 8 years old and at 57.

It was incredibly moving and one of the best books I’ve read, instant 5 stars.

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askard's review

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challenging emotional inspiring reflective medium-paced

4.0

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apoppyinthewind's review against another edition

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dark emotional inspiring reflective medium-paced

5.0

If you are going to read this book I highly recommend checking out the audiobook version which is read by Viola Davis because it adds so much to the experience. I tend to rate autobiographies high on principle because I think it's brave to share parts of one's life with readers and this book certainly deserves that rating. It's heartbreaking in the beginning chapters and brutally honest so be warned that this book deals heavily with the trauma of abuse, neglect, and poverty. There's also hope though and the latter chapters cover a mix of Davis' personal and professional life, her experiences and her thoughts about those experiences now.

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francica's review

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emotional inspiring fast-paced

5.0

No words....

I rarely read memoirs, but Viola Davis is one of those actresses that I have always admired and boy oh boy did she have a story to tell. I am glad I listened to the audiobook because it was narrated by her. What an experience I had listening. I laughed, I cried, I even reflected on my own experiences.

What is amazing is learning about how many obstacles Viola had to overcome in her life; poverty, abuse, domestic violence, neglect, everything imaginable. Sometimes we feel as if we could never rise above our problems, we whine and complain about everything. Viola is a great example of a woman with immense strength, someone who kept pushing even though many doors were shut in her face.

What I liked too is the fact that she stressed that becoming an actor should not be about the fame, that it should be an outlet to express oneself, it should be about the art. I really admired her advice for young actors. This book really is going down as one of my favourites for 2022.

I recommend this one to everyone. It is a really good memoir

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