socrates90's review
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
annakoski's review
3.0
While I agree with the overall message of the book: you do not need to forgive those who hurt you and society has an unhealthy obsession with forgiveness and irs causing physical illnesses or ailments. It wasnt written the greatest. The text had a very disjointed feel to it, a lot of what was said seemed to be forced together in a way that did not fit. Added to that, there wasnt anything entire groundbreaking or new to the thesis of this book.
bloodonsnow's review
1.0
The idea that harmful experiences as a child can inhibit someone as an adult is nothing new, nor is the idea that it can exacerbate illness. (Felitti et. al's study "Relationship of Childhood Abuse and Household Dysfunction to Many of the Leading Causes of Death in Adults: The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study" is hallmark and fantastic in examining some of the ways childhood harm perpetuates through adulthood. It doesn't just talk about abusive childhoods and addresses trauma from poverty, racism, and external trauma such as death of a loved one.) However, some of the language in this book makes it seem that if people knew about their childhood issues and just tried a little harder, they wouldn't have physical ailments. "But why did he have asthma? He suffered his first severe attack when he was nine. What drove him into this disease? Did he not have a loving mother? Was he able to sense that love, or was he assailed by doubts?" (p. 68). ... um. Maybe he just had asthma. Could it have been made worse by stress? Sure. Was it caused by his mother? Doubtful. Does that sound blamey? It sure as fuck does. The idea that physical and mental ailments will just go away if we resolve issues in our childhood is dangerous on the medical front and the psychological front; we need to treat the body, but also not guilt trip the mind.
It also got a lot self-indulgent at the end with her talking about her own patients. The manner in which she did so made me cringe.
It was an interesting concept that went too far into blame territory for my liking. Do I think that harmful parenting can hurt you later in life? I do! Do I think it's the reason you've got allergies? Nah. And don't go blaming yourself if you do have allergies. Get some Allegra or whatnot and have a cup of tea.
It also got a lot self-indulgent at the end with her talking about her own patients. The manner in which she did so made me cringe.
It was an interesting concept that went too far into blame territory for my liking. Do I think that harmful parenting can hurt you later in life? I do! Do I think it's the reason you've got allergies? Nah. And don't go blaming yourself if you do have allergies. Get some Allegra or whatnot and have a cup of tea.